@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@ @# h0W t0 LauGh Y0ur AsS 0Ff: @# @# ----------- #@ #@ pHuN tHinGs to d0 whEn borEd0m rEarS iT's uGly hEAd #@ #@ #@ #@***********************************************************************@# @# aNoTher pHIne pHiLe ph0r y0ur rEaDing pLeasure #@ #@ fRom the tWistEd mInd of: @# #@ The Madman @# @#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@ NOW IF YOU ARE LIKE ME.....YOU LOVE TO LAUGH...LAUGHTER IS...WELL.. FUNNY. WELL HERE IS SOME OF THE REALY PHUNNY THINGS I LIKE TO DO WHEN I GET BORED OR NEED A GOOD LAUGH: #1. GO TO RADIO SHACK AND SET ALL OF THERE AUTO-TIMER ALARMS TO GO OFF IN 60 MINUTES. BE CREATIVE, HIDE SOME IN THE STORE IN SEVERAL PLACES. THEN LEAVE AND COME BACK LATER AND WATCH THE PHUN, ACT SURPRISED... #2. GO TO ONE OF THE LARGER DEPARTMENT STORES SUCH AS KMART..ETC. AND PICK OUT ONE OF THE BIGGEST STEREO SYSTEMS YOU CAN FIND, NOW, TURN THE POWER OFF THEN TURN THE VOLUME A-L-L THE WAY UP. NOW WHEN SOME POOR SHMUCK COMES TO TRY IT OUT, HE WILL NOT ONLY BE A SLIGHTLY DEAF, HE WILL LOOK LIKE A TOTAL IDIOT. MOST PEOPLE DONT LOOK AT THE VOLUME SETTING WHEN THEY FIRST TURN ONE ON. #3. GO TO ONE OF THE LOCAL MALLS AND ACT LIKE YOU ARE USING THE FONE, THEN SMEAR A GOB OF VASELINE ALL OVER THE EARPIECE, THEN SIT SOMEWHERE CLOSE AND WATCH THE FONE, SOMEONE WILL COME TO USE IT AND -UHG- WILL THEY BE IN FOR A SURPRISE, TRY MIXING IN SOME RED FOOD COLORING FOR VARIETY, BELIEVE ME, THEY WONT KNOW WHAT IN THE HELL THEY GOT INTO. #4. BUY A CHEAP SET OF WALKIE TALKIES AND HIDE ONE IN LIKE THE SHRUBS OR SOMTHING IN THE ENTRANCE TO A MALL OR STORE. THEN SIT IT YOUR CAR WITH THE OTHER WALKIE TALKIE, AND WAIT FOR AN UNSUSPECTING MARK TO COME ALONG YOU CAN REALY EXPRESS YOUR CREATIVITY ON THIS ONE. THE POSSIBILATIES ARE ENDLESS...LIKE..."HEY, NIGGER!! DONT YOU BE STARIN' AT NO WHITE WOMEN...ETC...ETC.. #5. THIS ONE IS ONE OF MY FAVORITES, I THOUGHT OF THIS WHILE BEING BORED ON ONE OF THE LOCAL TELETHONS, YOU KNOW THE ONES, WHERE THEY HAVE LIKE LOCAL PEOPLE AND LOCAL NUMBERS. YOU LOOK FOR SOMEONE SITTING THERE THAT LOOKS LIKE A REAL GEEK AND THEN YOU CALL HIS/HER NUMBER AND IN A -whispered- VOICE YOU SAY "listen, I just wanted to tell you that you have a booger hanging out of your nose." THEN JUST WATCH THE REACTION. IMAGINE IT IF IT WHERE YOU!! YOU CAN REALY MILK THIS ONE, CALL RIGHT BACK, (AFTER THEY WHIPE THEIR NOSE) AND SAY: "ITS ME AGAIN, LISTEN, IT IS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF YOUR NOSE." TALK ABOUT GIVING SOMEONE A COMPLEX.. I DID THIS AND ME AND MY WIFE ROLLED ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING, IT WAS THE PHUNNIEST THING I EVER DID... YOU COULD EVEN USE YOUR VCR AND RECORD THE MEMORIES.. 旼컴커 旼컴컴컴컴커 � � 읕컴� 旼컴� � 컨왯컴커� � � 납 납 � � � 납 납 � 읕캐 냅컴켸읕켸 읕켸 05/28/94 �he M꼋꾬