This is a story, a story about a gerbil, a happy gerbil, a stupid
gerbil, a gerbil with a cause.  This gerbil's name was bitch.  Bitch was a
very sad gerbil, this is because during recess at happy gerbil school, all
the other gerbils would say "hey bitch, wanna play ball?".  All the other
gerbils started laughing when they compared him to a female dog... which he
wasnt, he was a male gerbil, not a female dog.  Bitch then aproached one of
the happy gerbils named ernest, and said to him "dont make fun of my name,
ernest"  so earnest replied in a sexxee gerbil voice,"no".
bitch then said, "yes".
and ernest said, "no".
then bitch replied, "yes".
ernest answered him with, "no".
bitch then said "yes".
then ernest said, "yes".
and then bitch, being the stupid bitch gerbil that he is, replied "no".
ernest said "haaa haaaaa... fooled you"

bitch then realized how stupid of a bitch he was, and started to cry.  this
of course was noticed by bitch's teacher, mrs. butteranus,  who threw bitch
out of the happy gerbil school for not being happy any more...

bitch then went to the sad gerbils with fucked up names school where he
could fit in with all the other sad gerbils with fucked up names.

bitch was then very happy to see that there were other gerbils like him,
and he fit in... this made him very happy.  but he couldnt smile, for if
his teacher mr. clorox caught him being happy, then he would make him go to
the happy gerbil school where he would be sad, and then they would make him
go back to the sad gerbil school.  and bitch couldnt afford a bus trip to
the happy gerbil school and back to the sad school because he spent all his
money from prostituting himself on a new tube of greese  with extra
lubrication and free johnny "ribbed for your pleasure" carson 78th
anniversy limited edition dildos with real whoopie cushion action.
anyways... bitch was very happy, but he had to disguise himself, so he got
one of those plastic eye glasses  and mustache and nose combo
thingamibobbers, and when he was happy, he'd put it on and pretend to be
somebody else so that his teacher wouldnt send him back to the happy gerbil
school.  the teacher saw him being happy once though.. and he promptly put
on the disguise.  it fooled the teacher, and he thought bitch was another
student... he still sent bitch to the happy gerbil school though, because
he was happy.

    this time, in the happy gerbil school, bitch saw a happy girl gerbil
there... her name was clitoris.  clitoris was a very pretty happy gerbil,
for she had something all the other gerbils didnt have... a penis...this
made her the envy of all the other happy girl gerbils and the dream girl
off all the happy boy gerbils.

    bitch had to have her, so he went to her, and said, "hi, im  bitch, do
you wanna go to the monster truck rally with me?"
clitty (as her friends called her) replied, "with you?  no".
bitch, being very learned in these kind of arguments, told her "yes".
clitty replied "no".
then bitch said "yes".
clitty said "no".
then bitch said "no".
clitty, being too busy admiring her penis said "yes"

bitch jumped for joy, and said "OH BOY!  YOU'LL GO OUT WITH ME?"
and before clitty could stop, he was saying how he bought a new dress, and
wanted clitty to meat his parents, and shop with him for lubricants.

clitty was a stupid, happy, and umm... a stupid gerbil, so she thought "oh,
one date cant hurt".  so clitty went with bitch to the monster truck rally.





 you finish the story, bitch... no.. not the gerbil, bitch, you bitch,
 umm... fuck you all... i dont feel like finishing it... so finish it,
 bitch... not bitch, but you, bitch... fuck you... what are you looking at?







                        - canteen boy