			  The Hacker Syndrome
			     By Tad Deriso
 
 
 
  There is some impelling force in all Hackers that seems to draw them to
their computers every day. How they get up at 4am to use the modem, and
how they can rack up a 300 dollar phone bill is beyond me.
  Most computer areas, at their home or  office, tend to be messy.
They try to keep it clean, but it is truly impossible. Whether it be
empty Coke cans lying all around, soldering devices, electric diodes,
computer parts, or Integrated circuts. Not only is it a pain for their
mother to look at, but a prime Russian ICBM missile target as well.
  There is much detail needed to explain a Hacker. For instance, instead
of organizing his clothes by color, best ones, or style, he organizes his
by pile. Also, he likes to sing songs such as, "Let's get Digital", "We
all live in a yellow subroutine", and "Somewhere over the RAMbow".
  Most Hackers do well in school. The reason is, not to impress their
teachers, not to get money from their parents, and not to be educated, but
they do it so they can hopefully get a scholarship to MIT. You can't blame
them  if they are looking out into space. It might be because they
are worried that MCI traced the call that they sent to NORAD.
  All Hackers, big or small love computers. Whether it be Trash-80's, or
an IBM 360/VM workstation. When they get on one, it's mighty hard to get
them off of it.
  There are 2 types of Hackers. One who likes to crash local BBS's, and
the one who writes programs in Assembly Language. The Hacker who crashes
systems is the one that most people think that a Hacker is. A typical
example of one is John Fredrickson (A.K.A. The Phone Man) He loves to
crash computers, and break into illegal systems. Some that he has
gotten in to are MCI, CitiBank, School systems, IBM, Southern Bell, and
Georgia Tech, not to mention all the ones in between.
  The second type of Hacker is the programmer. He writes games, utilities,
and anything else that he can think of. Take for example, John Harris, a
freelance software writer for On-Line Software Co. John had a brainstorm
one day, and decided to write Frogger for the Apple. He thought that it
would take about 3 weeks to complete. He started on Frogger a week late,
because of the complicated music set that he had to write. After two
months, he was almost done. He decided to take a break and go to the
Software Expo. He decided to take his nearly completed Frogger, and show
it to the consumers at the show. He also took with him, the only back-up
copy, in case the main disk did not boot.
   While at the fair, he was talking to the Manager on getting a booth. He
had his disks with him. Then when he got a booth reserved, he reached down
to get his disks, and they were gone! All his hard work, including the
MultiLevel character generator, music lines, disk subroutines, assembly
routines, debugging programs, etc. All gone.
   After that tragedy, John was in a deep depression. He finally started
working on it again in 3 months. He completed it in 4 months, and 3 days.
 
 
  Part Two:
   Hackers always take time off. There is always one way to notice a true
Hacker. At a party, the true Hacker is the one in the corner talking about
operating system security and how to get around it. At the beach, the True
Hacker is the one drawing flow charts in the sand. At a football game, the
true Hacker is the one comparing the football plays against a simulation
printed on 11 by 14 fanfold paper.
   Most Hackers work for the U.S. Government - mainly the Department of
Defense. you can see the best Hackers at the Jet Propulsion Labratory in
California.
   What sort of enviroment does a Hacker function best in? No, not a
heated room with a clean table and disks orgainzed neatly, but they do
best in rooms that have line-printed Snoopy calendars from the year 1969.
They do not know how to cook, so they survive on Twinkies and coffee.
Instead of wasting electricity for a heater, they spend it on
air-conditioners to cool of their computer system in mid-January when the
temperatures are below freezing. They wear layers and layers of clothing
to keep the body heat in. When you see one of these people, instead of a
Hacker coming into your mind, you think that he is about to go on a Polar
expedition somewhere in the North Pole.
   Hackers also like to hang around arcades. (This is also true for kids,
little old ladies, and fighter pilots.) There, secluded in their own
enviroment, Hackers can talk freely on computer hints and short cuts while
playing Pac-Man, or Joust.
   All Hackers like Graphics. They like low-resolution, but prefer
high-resolution the best. These graphics, such as Sine waves, rotating 3-D
boxes, and little ballons, are confined to the limits of a systems
capability. The older more experienced Hackers are the ones who are lucky
enough to get to work on a CRAY-1 SuperComputer, and maybe even a VAX
system. If they use these, they have only the limits of their imigination
to stop them.
   Most Middle School Hackers between the ages of 10 through 14, like to
use computers to do reports on, and play games. Some of these younger
generation Hackers have gotten into BASIC programming.
   Some people, like to impress real Hackers by making them think that
they know everything. There is a certain name for this kind of person. He
is Sub-Hacker.(Intillectious dumbfoundeth) For instance, you come up to
them one day, and say,"Hey so-and-so what does BASIC stand for?" and you
could sit there for days, and he would act like the answer was on the tip
of his tongue, when it was probablly in his toes. It is people like this
that give Hackers a bad name.
 
  Part Three:
   All Hackers have certain rules that they go by. One is to never call
long distance on Monday, because of the high phone charge. Another is If
builders built buildings they way programmers wrote programs, the first
woodpecker that comes along would destroy civilization. Another is, if the
computer accepts a program on the first run without any errors, either
there is a malfunction, or it must be a dream.
   Hackers are a unique breed. Combining intillegence, personality, and a
morale sense of good taste. A Hacker enjoys the enviroment that appeals to
him the most. Such as, the computer room, the arcade, science lab, or the
Atari downstairs. They like to be alone. Secluded in their own thoughts,
thinking of what the password could be to log on to General Electric.
Hackers are the people who are going to make our future brighter, and more
exciting in the field of electronics, data processing, artificial
intillegence, and programming. We need to support these people in all the
ways that we can, so we will be insured of a more happier future in the
world of technological advacements.
 
					    Tad Deriso
 
   (This Document was entered in the Cobb County Writing Fair.
    any unauthorized duplication is strictly prohibited.)
 
	       (1st Place winner in Kalediscope)
