The Haloween Surprise

Characters : 
             Dog :  the rebellious dog who doth repent for his sins

             Blenda : the abusive owner who shouldest receive swacks upon
                      her unmaidenly face thrice

{all of this is written in ye old language}
{may not be suitable for younger audiences}

Narrator : So, once again, the poor dog hath been thrashed by the infamous
Blenda in her fit of anger.  Dog hath sworn most truely that she would
be avenged, arrrr!  Today, is a special day, a day where many a young un
walk upon the streets of danger to beg for sweets from complete strangers.
Dog, being a rebellious dog, and who hath want for alms, will attempt to 
kill two birds with one stone, she will escape from the villain and accept
the candy.  What an evil and malicious plan. Arrrr!  The mood is set.
        Many an hour hath passed, before the first begger cometh to yonder
door.  "Trick or treat!!"  shout the ruthless beggers.  Lo and behold, they
hold sweets in bags and hold them out to Blenda!!  

Blenda : Thank you kind thieves and beggers who doth walk upon mine home.
        I thank you for such generosity! (a slam of the door)
        
Narrator : Not realizing the strange custom of the strangers, Blenda has 
wrought upon herself great misfortune.
          As I speak, a stream of eggs do fly upon her home, thus creating
great distress for the not so fair Blenda.

Blenda : "Evil doers! Beware.  I shall have my revenge upon thee. I shall
catch thee while thee runneth.  I shall meet thee in thine sleep.  I shall..

Narrator : An egg flies into Blenda's face, causing great rage and fury.

Blenda : I shall waiteth no longer.  Behold, behold the wrath!! (another egg
in her face)  Arrrr!

Narrator : Blenda runs with all her might towards the delinquents (use your
imagination here, for example, imagine her with one bad leg, jumping with
the good and dragging the bad.  Imagine her with her hair flying wildly in
the wind, with a bone chilling cackle in resonance.  Imagine her fall, still
determined to get at the kids, pulling herself towards them with the blades
of grass on her lawn) but when she reaches them, they guffaw at her, and
kick her in the face.  

Various kids : Hahahha! You rampant hag, you think that you could attack us?!
Well we're going to teach you a lesson! 

Blenda : When the moon rises and doth gleam at thine non-pulcritudinous
visages, then, then!, we shall see who has the laugh! Hahahahahah!
Hahahhahaha!

Various kids : We better finish her off before she gets really crazy!

Narrator : Blenda is thrashed soundly for her villainous deeds.  While
Dog sees her master being attacked, helpless, she decides to join in.

Dog : Grrrr! arrrr! areiouererrrr!  (this is for making me watch the mighty
morphin power rangers every weekday from 3:00 to 3:30.)
      Arrrr! aeooiu!  Grrrr! (this is for the time when you had hemorroids
and used me as a pillow)
      Grrrr! Arrrr! Grrrr!.....(various other things that she did to Dog)

Narrator : As the children and Dog are practicing their Kung Fu skills
upon the hapless witch, the moon rises (everyone together now! Oooooooo!, 
scary!!!)

Blenda : Now!, Now! you shall feel the wrath of Blenda, mistress of evil,
Mistress of the dark, mistress of Bon Jovi, mistress of Anthrax, mistress
of ....you get the point.

Various kids and Dog : Shutgrrr! uparrr! 

Narrator : kids continue to demonstrate their Kung Fu skills and Dog continues
to show us just how sharp her teeth really are.
           After Blenda has been beaten to a pulp, she realizes that she 
shouldn't have been so cruel to Dog, she should have been meaner!!!
(Shing Shing, Shing Shing {sound from Friday the # when something bad is 
about to happen)
                                        The DogCatcher