                 Pirating Cable Premium Channels

    This  is for all of you that have cable but don't have  those 
premium  channels  like HBO, Cinemax, and  Playboy  because  your 
parents  are  too  cheap to get them or they  think  that  you'll 
become  a stupid moron if you get them. Well, this will tell  you 
how  you can get all those premium channels as a  perfect,  clear 
picture at absolutely no charge.

    First  of all, you have to have one of those real  old  cable 
boxes that don't have a remote control but the ones that have the 
little  buttons  that you have to push (I don't  know  about  the 
other kind, but you can go ahead and try.)

    What  you  do is open up your cable box with  a  small  screw 
driver or a thin knife. Inside you'll see some copper thingies (I 
forgot  what they're called) but anyways, they're thin and  long. 
Each  one  of these represents a channel. You'll also  see  these 
little  triangular things, which usually touch one of the  copper 
things. Well, if you haven't figured out already, when the copper 
things  are  being touched by the triangular things,  this  means 
that  you're getting that channel on the channel number that  the 
Dtriangular  thing  (from now on I'll call the  triangular  things
"triangles" and the copper things "coppers") represents.

    The  thing that you have to do is find all the  coppers  that 
aren't  being  touched by any triangles. These  are  the  premium 
channels!  Now, find a triangle that isn't touching a copper  and 
turn it so it touches the copper. That's all!! Now you have  your 
premium channels, at no charge. Just make sure that you set  them 
back if you ever turn your cable box in so that the cable company 
doesn't find out what you've been doing.
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