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         Doodah Humor Magazine     Volume 3, Number 12
                                            July, 1991
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Editorial Offices:

Charlie Radd, Editor and publisher
Paul Forrester, supervisory editor

plus a staff of K's submitting articles under various aliases
and/or real names.

The editor can be reached through the Politics Conference on the
ILink  network found  on PCBoard.  No guarantee is made that you
will receive  a reply.  We read the  mail, but we may or may not
answer it.
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                           CONTENTS THIS ISSUE:

                     Tra-la-la, Our Christmas Issue!
                    Gaiety, Jocularity, and Frivolity
                         Computer News and Humour
                            Sarcasm and Parody
                               Naughty Bits
________________________________________________________________________

                         BOY, ARE OUR FACES RED!

      Last issue, Number 311, SHOULD have been dated November, 1836.
                  Instead, the year was listed as 1985!
      Our proofreader has been summarily whipped by our front-office
                       secretary, Mistress Nicole.
______________________________________________________________________

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Sirs:

    I  am at a loss to explain how one gets the name Ed Itor.  I can only 
assume  that  your parents are of Greek extraction with a surname that is 
so  totally  unpronouncable  and  unwritable that the immigration officer 
decided  to use the diminutive form "Itor" to simplify things.  I further 
assume  that  once ensconced in the 'Estados Unidos' your parents decided 
to  Anglicize  you  with  the  Christian name of 'Ed'; perhaps it was the 
name of some famous actor or World Leader at the time?

    I  do not normally procure your particular publication.  My workmates 
and  I  regularly  purchase  similar  and  competing  journals out of the 
profits  of  the  unit coffee swindle and take it in turns to acquire our 
favorite  publications.   However,  in  recent  months, the publication I 
usually  peruse has deteriorated in both its philosophical ideals and the 
quality  of  items  therein,  somewhat  akin  to  the fate of 'The Times' 
newspaper  after  one  Rupert  Murdoch,  Esq.  got  his  claws  into  its 
editorial.   Thank  you,  God,  for  'The  Independent'.  I must say your 
sense of timing remains as impeccable as always.

    Anyway,  as  the  Universe continued to evolve I began to think of an 
alternative  purchase.   As  the  contents  of  your June issue looked so 
inviting,  I  decided to dip into this pool of alternative knowledge.  My 
newsagent  viewed  this  change  with an open display of alarm; defecting 
from  'The Times' was one thing, getting NutWorks as a change to my usual 
diet   of   intellectual   stimulation  was  something  altogether  quite 
different.

    On  arriving  at  my  place of work, management unreasonably insisted 
that  I  labor on a project of theirs until lunch time.  At the appointed 
hour  I  sat  down  with a few colleagues and, sandwiches to the left and 
NutWorks  to  the  fore,  I  began  to  scan the contents prior to a good 
read.   On  arriving  at  line  383,  I  suffered  a seizure which lasted 
several hours.

    Now  this is true.  The cause of all this trembling inactivity can be 
attributed  to  the  stress  caused  by  the use of the directional arrow 
keys.   According  to the persons present, I sat motionless for about ten 
minutes,  slightly  shaking  with  a  half-eaten  salmon  sandwich firmly 
grasped  in  my left hand (lest some peasant try to steal it), transfixed 
by the wisdom imparted on that line.

    It  was  only  when I was physically agitated by a friend that I came 
out  of  this  deep  reverie.   I  tried  to  explain  why  I had been so 
affected, but found it impossible to do so.

    I  pondered  my reaction for several days afterwards.  Following deep 
philosophical  analysis  of  this  occurrence  I  can  only  describe the 
experience  in a quasi-mystical form.  The best I can describe this as is 
the  exact  opposite  of  castration anxiety.  The lads I work with think 
I'm bonkers.  I think I'm bonkers.

    I  have  seen women with lumps and bumps at least equal to, or better 
than,   the  lumps  and  bumps  to  be  observed  on  the  person  of  my 
infatuation.   What  makes  her so appealing is that the whole is so much 
greater  that  the  sum  of  all  the individual parts.  Philosophers and 
psychologists have a word to describe such phenomena:  Gestalt.

    I  now  come  to the point in my diatribe where I wish to complain on 
two points 曚

-------  SYSTEM ERROR:  CODE 1402 -- SEVERE LINE NOISE -- CONTACT BROKEN

---------------

Sirs:

    Why  on  Earth  does  a  publication  of your stature have to make up 
letters?   I  would  have thought you would be overwhelmed (maybe you are 
just  whelmed?)  by  the  genuine article -- if only letters of complaint  
about  the  vapid,  unfunny  garbage  which  you  dash  off to insult our 
intelligence.

Name Withheld
Long Island, NY


Editor's Reply:

    Well,  Mr.  Withheld,  we  do indeed get stacks of letters.  Some are 
not  suitable  for  publication as they praise its high quality.  This is 
always  nice  for  the  editors  to  read,  but  it doesn't make exciting 
reading  for the customer.  Anyway, no one ever believes letters praising 
NutWorks can be genuine.

    The  other  sort  are from readers who were particularly impressed by 
the  sensual meanderings of a girl in a particular issue.  Typically they 
go  on  for  page  after page about this lovely creature.  The trouble is 
the  reader  has  usually  obtained  WeirdHouse from  a computer bulletin
board,  which,  allowing for  national dispersal,  and the  fact that the
reader has taken  a  month or so  to write, added to our three-month lead
time, means a letters column full of comments on issues six to ten months
old which few readers could be expected to remember anyway!

    Again  useful  for  us,  because we have the master copies and can go 
back  over  the  referenced  issues  and  make  use  of the criticism and 
comment.  But dull for you.

    Another  typical  letter  is  so revoltingly filthy that you can hear 
the  heavy  breathing  before  you  open  the  envelope.   These  are the 
products  of  another  man's lust, written late at night in the full heat 
of  desire.  But like many things done and said in the bedroom, they look 
pretty silly by the clear light of day.

    We   don't   publish  many  like  this  unless  they're  particularly 
amusing.   And,  to  be  honest,  we  think  most of the writers would be 
highly embarassed to see them in cold print.

    Another  type of letter is from the religious nut who dumps off on us 
in  a fit of self-righteous pique and never explains quite how he came to 
be reading us in the first place.

    The   rest:    the   witty,   pithy,  funny,  outrageous,  sexy,  and 
intelligent ones, those are the ones we publish.

    As you can see, we are a bit short of them this month.

    So  the  answer  is  simple:   If  you  don't like the vapid, unfunny 
garbage I write, put pen to paper.

    I  could quite easily be in the nearest establishment bearing a label 
reading  "Ye  Olde  Pubbehouse", you know!  I wouldn't mind being put out 
of the vapid, unfunny, garbage-writing job.  Not one little bit.

---------------

And  now  the  computer  stuff,  seeing as how we've rambled on for three 
pages  without  anything  of  substance  coming of it.  We now present in 
four  Parts,  much like a fine symphony or an episode of "Barnaby Jones", 
a  piece  entitled  "The Hacker's Dictionary".  Each of the four parts is 
some  20K  in length, so we've broken it up into manageable sections.  It 
is  our  Merry  Christmas  present to you.  Of course, it we get tired of 
typing  and  thinking  up  witty  things,  we may present the next two or 
three parts all at once.


                 "The Hacker's Dictionary" - Part 1 of 4

/*=================================================================*/

        Compiled by Guy L. Steele Jr., Raphael Finkel, Donald
        Woods,  Geoff  Goodfellow  and  Mark  Crispin,   with
        assistance from the MIT  and Stanford AI  communities
        and   Worcester    Polytechnic    Institute.     Some
        contributions were  submitted  via the  ARPAnet  from
        miscellaneous sites.

Verb  doubling:  a  standard  construction is to double a verb and use it   
as   a  comment  on  what  the  implied  subject  does.   Often  used  to   
terminate  a  conversation.   Typical examples involve WIN, LOSE,   HACK, 
FLAME, BARF, CHOMP:
        "The disk heads just crashed."  "Lose, lose."
        "Mostly he just talked about his --- crock.  Flame, flame."
        "Boy, what a bagbiter!  Chomp, chomp!"

Soundalike  slang:  similar  to  Cockney rhyming slang.  Often made up on   
the  spur  of  the  moment  (sometimes  called  the sperm of the moment).  
Standard examples:
        Boston Globe => Boston Glob
        Herald American => Horrid (Harried) American
        New York Times => New York Slime
        historical reasons => hysterical raisins
        government property - do not duplicate (seen on keys)
                => government duplicity - do not propagate
   Often the substitution will be made in such a way as to slip in
   a standard jargon word:
        Dr. Dobb's Journal => Dr. Frob's Journal
        creeping featurism => feeping creaturism
        Margaret Jacks Hall => Marginal Hacks Hall

The  -P  convention:  turning  a  word  into  a question by appending the   
syllable  "P";  from  the  LISP convention of appending the letter "P" to 
denote  a  predicate  (a  Boolean-values  function).  The question should 
expect a yes/no answer, though it needn't.  (See T and NIL.)
     At dinnertime: "Foodp?"  "Yeah, I'm pretty hungry." or "T!"
     "State-of-the-world-P?"  (Straight) "I'm about to go home."
                              (Humorous) "Yes, the world has a state."
[One  of  the  best  of  these is a Gosperism (i.e., due to Bill Gosper).  
When  we  were at a Chinese restaurant, he wanted to know whether someone 
would  like  to  share  with  him  a  two-person-sized bowl of soup.  His 
inquiry was: "Split-p soup?" --GLS]

Peculiar nouns: MIT AI hackers love to take various words and add the
   wrong endings to them to make nouns and verbs, often by extending a
   standard rule to nonuniform cases.  Examples:
                porous => porosity
                generous => generosity
        Ergo:   mysterious => mysteriosity
                ferrous => ferocity
   Other examples:  winnitude, disgustitude, hackification.

Spoken  inarticulations:   Words  such  as  "mumble", "sigh", and "groan"   
are  spoken  in  places  where  their  referent  might  more naturally be   
used.    It   has  been  suggested  that  this  usage  derives  from  the   
impossibility  of  representing  such  noises  in  a  com  link.  Another   
expression sometimes heard is "complain!"

/*=================================================================*/

ANGLE BRACKETS (primarily MIT) n. Either of the characters "<" and
   ">".  See BROKET.

AOS (aus (East coast) ay-ahs (West coast)) [based on a PDP-10
   increment instruction] v. To increase the amount of something.
   "Aos the campfire."  Usage: considered silly.  See SOS.

ARG n. Abbreviation for "argument" (to a function), used so often as
   to have become a new word.

AUTOMAGICALLY adv. Automatically, but in a way which, for some reason
   (typically because it is too complicated, or too ugly, or perhaps
   even too trivial), I don't feel like explaining to you.  See MAGIC.
   Example: Some programs which produce XGP output files spool them
   automagically.

BAGBITER 1. n. Equipment or program that fails, usually
   intermittently.  2. BAGBITING: adj. Failing hardware or software.
   "This bagbiting system won't let me get out of spacewar."  Usage:
   verges on obscenity.  Grammatically separable; one may speak of
   "biting the bag".  Synonyms: LOSER, LOSING, CRETINOUS, BLETCHEROUS,
   BARFUCIOUS, CHOMPER, CHOMPING.

BANG n. Common alternate name for EXCL (q.v.), especially at CMU.  See
   SHRIEK.

BAR 1. The second metasyntactic variable, after FOO.  "Suppose we have
   two functions FOO and BAR.  FOO calls BAR..."  2. Often appended to
   FOO to produce FOOBAR.

BARF [from the "layman" slang, meaning "vomit"] 1. ib42rj. Term of
   disgust.  See BLETCH.  2. v. Choke, as on input.  May mean to give
   an error message.  "The function `=' compares two fixnums or two
   flonums, and barfs on anything else."  3. BARFULOUS, BARFUCIOUS:
   adj. Said of something which would make anyone barf, if only for
   aesthetic reasons.

BELLS AND WHISTLES n. Unnecessary but useful (or amusing) features of
   a program.  "Now that we've got the basic program working, let's go
   back and add some bells and whistles."  Nobody seems to know what
   distinguishes a bell from a whistle.

BIGNUMS [from Macsyma] n. 1. In backgammon, large numbers on the dice.
   2. Multiple-precision (sometimes infinitely extendable) integers
   and, through analogy, any very large numbers.  3. EL CAMINO BIGNUM:
   El Camino Real, a street through the San Francisco peninsula that
   originally extended (and still appears in places) all the way to
   Mexico City.  It was termed "El Camino Double Precision" when
   someone noted it was a very long street, and then "El Camino
   Bignum" when it was pointed out that it was hundreds of miles long.

BIN [short for BINARY; used as a second file name on ITS] 1. n.
   BINARY.  2. BIN FILE: A file containing the BIN for a program.
   Usage: used at MIT, which runs on ITS.  The equivalent term at
   Stanford is DMP (pronounced "dump") FILE.  Other names used include
   SAV ("save") FILE (DEC and Tenex), SHR ("share") and LOW FILES
   (DEC), and EXE ("ex'ee") FILE (DEC and Twenex).  Also in this
   category are the input files to the various flavors of linking
   loaders (LOADER, LINK-10, STINK), called REL FILES.

BINARY n. The object code for a program.

BIT n. 1. The unit of information; the amount of information obtained
   by asking a yes-or-no question.  "Bits" is often used simply to
   mean information, as in "Give me bits about DPL replicators".  2.
   [By extension from "interrupt bits" on a computer] A reminder that
   something should be done or talked about eventually.  Upon seeing
   someone that you haven't talked to for a while, it's common for one
   or both to say, "I have a bit set for you."

BITBLT (bit'blit) 1. v. To perform a complex operation on a large
   block of bits, usually involving the bits being displayed on a
   bitmapped raster screen.  See BLT.  2. n. The operation itself.

BIT BUCKET n. 1. A receptacle used to hold the runoff from the
   computer's shift registers.  2. Mythical destination of deleted
   files, GC'ed memory, and other no-longer-accessible data.  3. The
   physical device associated with "NUL:".

BLETCH [from German "brechen", to vomit (?)] 1. interj. Term of
   disgust.  2. BLETCHEROUS: adj. Disgusting in design or function.
   "This keyboard is bletcherous!"  Usage: slightly comic.

BLT (blit, very rarely belt) [based on the PDP-10 block transfer
   instruction; confusing to users of the PDP-11] 1. v. To transfer a
   large contiguous package of information from one place to another.
   2. THE BIG BLT: n. Shuffling operation on the PDP-10 under some
   operating systems that consumes a significant amount of computer
   time.  3. (usually pronounced B-L-T) n. Sandwich containing bacon,
   lettuce, and tomato.

BOGOSITY n. The degree to which something is BOGUS (q.v.).  At CMU,
   bogosity is measured with a bogometer; typical use: in a seminar,
   when a speaker says something bogus, a listener might raise his
   hand and say, "My bogometer just triggered."  The agreed-upon unit
   of bogosity is the microLenat (uL).

BOGUS (WPI, Yale, Stanford) adj. 1. Non-functional.  "Your patches are
   bogus."  2. Useless.  "OPCON is a bogus program."  3. False.  "Your
   arguments are bogus."  4. Incorrect.  "That algorithm is bogus."
   5. Silly.  "Stop writing those bogus sagas."  (This word seems to
   have some, but not all, of the connotations of RANDOM.)
   [Etymological note from Lehman/Reid at CMU:  "Bogus" was originally
   used (in this sense) at Princeton, in the late 60's.  It was used
   not particularly in the CS department, but all over campus.  It
   came to Yale, where one of us (Lehman) was an undergraduate, and
   (we assume) elsewhere through the efforts of Princeton alumni who
   brought the word with them from their alma mater.  In the Yale
   case, the alumnus is Michael Shamos, who was a graduate student at
   Yale and is now a faculty member here.  A glossary of bogus words
   was compiled at Yale when the word was first popularized (e.g.,
   autobogophobia: the fear of becoming bogotified).]

BOUNCE (Stanford) v. To play volleyball.  "Bounce, bounce!  Stop
   wasting time on the computer and get out to the court!"

BRAIN-DAMAGED [generalization of "Honeywell Brain Damage" (HBD), a
   theoretical disease invented to explain certain utter cretinisms in
   Multics] adj. Obviously wrong; cretinous; demented.  There is an
   implication that the person responsible must have suffered brain
   damage, because he should have known better.  Calling something
   brain-damaged is really bad; it also implies it is unusable.

BREAK v. 1. To cause to be broken (in any sense).  "Your latest patch
   to the system broke the TELNET server."  2. (of a program) To stop
   temporarily, so that it may be examined for debugging purposes.
   The place where it stops is a BREAKPOINT.

BROKEN adj. 1. Not working properly (of programs).  2. Behaving
   strangely; especially (of people), exhibiting extreme depression.

BROKET [by analogy with "bracket": a "broken bracket"] (primarily
   Stanford) n. Either of the characters "<" and ">".  (At MIT, and
   apparently in The Real World (q.v.) as well, these are usually
   called ANGLE BRACKETS.)

BUCKY BITS (primarily Stanford) n. The bits produced by the CTRL and
   META shift keys on a Stanford (or Knight) keyboard.  Rumor has it
   that the idea for extra bits for characters came from Niklaus
   Wirth, and that his nickname was `Bucky'.
   DOUBLE BUCKY: adj. Using both the CTRL and META keys.  "The command
   to burn all LEDs is double bucky F."

BUG [from telephone terminology, "bugs in a telephone cable", blamed
   for noisy lines; however, Jean Sammet has repeatedly been heard to
   claim that the use of the term in CS comes from a story concerning
   actual bugs found wedged in an early malfunctioning computer] n. An
   unwanted and unintended property of a program.  (People can have
   bugs too (even winners) as in "PHW is a super winner, but he has
   some bugs.")  See FEATURE.

BUM 1. v. To make highly efficient, either in time or space, often at
   the expense of clarity.  The object of the verb is usually what was
   removed ("I managed to bum three more instructions.") but can be
   the program being changed ("I bummed the inner loop down to seven
   microseconds.")  2. n. A small change to an algorithm to make it
   more efficient.

BUZZ v. To run in a very tight loop, perhaps without guarantee of
   getting out.

CANONICAL adj. The usual or standard state or manner of something.
   A true story:  One Bob Sjoberg, new at the MIT AI Lab, expressed
   some annoyance at the use of jargon.  Over his loud objections, we
   made a point of using jargon as much as possible in his presence,
   and eventually it began to sink in.  Finally, in one conversation,
   he used the word "canonical" in jargon-like fashion without
   thinking.
   Steele: "Aha!  We've finally got you talking jargon too!"
   Stallman: "What did he say?"
   Steele: "He just used `canonical' in the canonical way."

CATATONIA (kat-uh-toe'nee-uh) n. A condition of suspended animation in
   which the system is in a wedged (CATATONIC) state.

CDR (ku'der) [from LISP] v. With "down", to trace down a list of
   elements.  "Shall we cdr down the agenda?"  Usage: silly.

CHINE NUAL n. The Lisp Machine Manual, so called because the title is
   wrapped around the cover so only those letters show.

CHOMP v. To lose; to chew on something of which more was bitten off
   than one can.  Probably related to gnashing of teeth.  See
   BAGBITER.  A hand gesture commonly accompanies this, consisting of
   the four fingers held together as if in a mitten or hand puppet,
   and the fingers and thumb open and close rapidly to illustrate a
   biting action.  The gesture alone means CHOMP CHOMP (see Verb
   Doubling).

CLOSE n. Abbreviation for "close (or right) parenthesis", used when
   necessary to eliminate oral ambiguity.  See OPEN.

COKEBOTTLE n. Any very unusual character.  MIT people complain about
   the "control-meta-cokebottle" commands at SAIL, and SAIL people
   complain about the "altmode-altmode-cokebottle" commands at MIT.

COM MODE (variant: COMM MODE) [from the ITS feature for linking two or
   more terminals together so that text typed on any is echoed on all,
   providing a means of conversation among hackers] n. The state a
   terminal is in when linked to another in this way.  Com mode has a
   special set of jargon words, used to save typing, which are not
   used orally:
        BCNU    Be seeing you.
        BTW     By the way...
        BYE?    Are you ready to unlink?  (This is the standard way to
                end a com mode conversation; the other person types
                BYE to confirm, or else continues the conversation.)
        CUL     See you later.
        FOO?    A greeting, also meaning R U THERE?  Often used in the
                case of unexpected links, meaning also "Sorry if I
                butted in" (linker) or "What's up?" (linkee).
        FYI     For your information...
        GA      Go ahead (used when two people have tried to type
                simultaneously; this cedes the right to type to
                the other).
        HELLOP  A greeting, also meaning R U THERE?  (An instance
                of the "-P" convention.)
        MtFBWY  May the Force be with you.  (From Star Wars.)
        NIL     No (see the main entry for NIL).
        OBTW    Oh, by the way...
        ROFL    Rolling On Floor Laughing (pronounced Roffle, like the
                                           Hamburglar says it)
        R U THERE?      Are you there?
        SEC     Wait a second (sometimes written SEC...).
        T       Yes (see the main entry for T).
        TTFN    Ta Ta For Now
        TNX     Thanks.
        TNX 1.0E6       Thanks a million (humorous).
        <double CRLF>  When the typing party has finished, he types
                two CRLF's to signal that he is done; this leaves a
                blank line between individual "speeches" in the
                conversation, making it easier to re-read the
                preceding text.
        <name>: When three or more terminals are linked, each speech
                is preceded by the typist's login name and a colon (or
                a hyphen) to indicate who is typing.  The login name
                often is shortened to a unique prefix (possibly a
                single letter) during a very long conversation.
        /\/\/\  The equivalent of a giggle.
   At Stanford, where the link feature is implemented by "talk loops",
   the term TALK MODE is used in place of COM MODE.  Most of the above
   "sub-jargon" is used at both Stanford and MIT.

CONNECTOR CONSPIRACY [probably came into prominence with the
   appearance of the KL-10, none of whose connectors match anything
   else] n. The tendency of manufacturers (or, by extension,
   programmers or purveyors of anything) to come up with new products
   which don't fit together with the old stuff, thereby making you buy
   either all new stuff or expensive interface devices.

CONS [from LISP] 1. v. To add a new element to a list.  2. CONS UP:
   v. To synthesize from smaller pieces: "to cons up an example".

CRASH 1. n. A sudden, usually drastic failure.  Most often said of the
   system (q.v., definition #1), sometimes of magnetic disk drives.
   "Three lusers lost their files in last night's disk crash."  A disk
   crash which entails the read/write heads dropping onto the surface
   of the disks and scraping off the oxide may also be referred to as
   a "head crash".  2. v. To fail suddenly.  "Has the system just
   crashed?"  Also used transitively to indicate the cause of the
   crash (usually a person or a program, or both).  "Those idiots
   playing spacewar crashed the system."  Sometimes said of people.
   See GRONK OUT.

CRETIN 1. n. Congenital loser (q.v.).  2. CRETINOUS: adj. See
   BLETCHEROUS and BAGBITING.  Usage: somewhat ad hominem.

CRLF (cur'lif, sometimes crul'lif) n. A carriage return (CR) followed
   by a line feed (LF).  See TERPRI.

CROCK [probably from "layman" slang, which in turn may be derived from
   "crock of shit"] n. An awkward feature or programming technique
   that ought to be made cleaner.  Example: Using small integers to
   represent error codes without the program interpreting them to the
   user is a crock.  Also, a technique that works acceptably but which
   is quite prone to failure if disturbed in the least, for example
   depending on the machine opcodes having particular bit patterns so
   that you can use instructions as data words too; a tightly woven,
   almost completely unmodifiable structure.

CRUFTY [from "cruddy"] adj. 1. Poorly built, possibly overly complex.
   "This is standard old crufty DEC software".  Hence CRUFT, n. shoddy
   construction.  Also CRUFT, v. [from hand cruft, pun on hand craft]
   to write assembler code for something normally (and better) done by
   a compiler.  2. Unpleasant, especially to the touch, often with
   encrusted junk.  Like spilled coffee smeared with peanut butter and
   catsup.  Hence CRUFT, n. disgusting mess.  3. Generally unpleasant.
   CRUFTY or CRUFTIE n. A small crufty object (see FROB); often one
   which doesn't fit well into the scheme of things.  "A LISP property
   list is a good place to store crufties (or, random cruft)."
   [Note:  Does CRUFT have anything to do with the Cruft Lab at
   Harvard?  I don't know, though I was a Harvard student. - GLS]

CRUNCH v. 1. To process, usually in a time-consuming or complicated
   way.  Connotes an essentially trivial operation which is
   nonetheless painful to perform.  The pain may be due to the
   triviality being imbedded in a loop from 1 to 1000000000.  "FORTRAN
   programs do mostly number crunching."  2. To reduce the size of a
   file by a complicated scheme that produces bit configurations
   completely unrelated to the original data, such as by a Huffman
   code.  (The file ends up looking like a paper document would if
   somebody crunched the paper into a wad.)  Since such compression
   usually takes more computations than simpler methods such as
   counting repeated characters (such as spaces) the term is doubly
   appropriate.  (This meaning is usually used in the construction
   "file crunch(ing)" to distinguish it from "number crunch(ing)".)
   3. n. The character "#".  Usage: used at Xerox and CMU, among other
   places.  Other names for "#" include SHARP, NUMBER, HASH, PIG-PEN,
   POUND-SIGN, and MESH.  GLS adds: I recall reading somewhere that
   most of these are names for the # symbol IN CONTEXT.  The name for
   the sign itself is "octothorp".

CTY (city) n. The terminal physically associated with a computer's
   operating console.

CUSPY [from the DEC acronym CUSP, for Commonly Used System Program,
   i.e., a utility program used by many people] (WPI) adj. 1. (of a
   program) Well-written.  2. Functionally excellent.  A program which
   performs well and interfaces well to users is cuspy.  See RUDE.

DAEMON (day'mun, dee'mun) [archaic form of "demon", which has slightly
   different connotations (q.v.)] n. A program which is not invoked
   explicitly, but which lays dormant waiting for some condition(s) to
   occur.  The idea is that the perpetrator of the condition need not
   be aware that a daemon is lurking (though often a program will
   commit an action only because it knows that it will implicitly
   invoke a daemon).  For example, writing a file on the lpt spooler's
   directory will invoke the spooling daemon, which prints the file.
   The advantage is that programs which want (in this example) files
   printed need not compete for access to the lpt.  They simply enter
   their implicit requests and let the daemon decide what to do with
   them.  Daemons are usually spawned automatically by the system, and
   may either live forever or be regenerated at intervals.  Usage:
   DAEMON and DEMON (q.v.) are often used interchangeably, but seem to
   have distinct connotations.  DAEMON was introduced to computing by
   CTSS people (who pronounced it dee'mon) and used it to refer to
   what is now called a DRAGON or PHANTOM (q.v.).  The meaning and
   pronunciation have drifted, and we think this glossary reflects
   current usage.

DAY MODE  See PHASE (of people).

DEADLOCK n. A situation wherein two or more processes are unable to
   proceed because each is waiting for another to do something.  A
   common example is a program communicating to a PTY or STY, which
   may find itself waiting for output from the PTY/STY before sending
   anything more to it, while the PTY/STY is similarly waiting for
   more input from the controlling program before outputting anything.
   (This particular flavor of deadlock is called "starvation".
   Another common flavor is "constipation", where each process is
   trying to send stuff to the other, but all buffers are full because
   nobody is reading anything.)  See DEADLY EMBRACE.

DEADLY EMBRACE n. Same as DEADLOCK (q.v.), though usually used only
   when exactly two processes are involved.  DEADLY EMBRACE is the
   more popular term in Europe; DEADLOCK in the United States.

       *****  End of "The Hacker's Dictionary", part 1 of 4  *****
              Part two will be found in NutWorks Number 401
                Coming to a BBS near you in January 1989!

______________________________________________________________________
Notes on updating this file:

This file is maintained at three locations.   It is  AIWORD.RF[UP,DOC]
at SAIL, and GLS;JARGON >  at MIT-MC and at MIT-AI.   If you make  any
changes, please FTP the new file to the other location.   (NOTE:   Use
ASCII mode in FTP to avoid screwing up the tilde char!)   It is also a
good idea to compare this file  against the copy on the other  machine
before FTP'ing and to merge any  changes found there,  in case someone
else forgot to do the FTP.    Also, please  let us know  (see list  of
names below) about your changes so that we can double-check them.

Try to conform to the format already being used--70 character lines,
3-character indentations, pronunciations in parentheses, etymologies
in brackets, single-space after def'n numbers and word classes, etc.

Stick to the standard ASCII character set.

If you'd rather not mung the file yourself, send your definitions to
DON @ SAIL, GLS @ MIT-AI, and/or MRC @ SAIL.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

                In our Happy New Year edition of NutWorks:

                         More Hacker's Dictionary
                        More Letters to the Editor
                     Sleazy parody of Edgar Allan Poe

                     Hits the modems in mid-December!
                                NutWorks!
