PLA036

Phone Losers of America Issue #036

Released on October 25, 1995

Recently an unnamed person awoke around noon and began his day in the usual manner by picking up the phone and dialing the number of a local person that he had been annoying for a few months. Our friend was startled, however, when instead of hearing the normal weary "hello" he heard a computer carrier. He jumped out of bed, turned on Q-Modem and called it again.

To make a long story short, it turned out that the victim had gone somewhere and left his computer on and his terminal program in the host mode. With a bit of nosing around, he was able to get a dos prompt and look at everything on the C: drive. The first thing that caught our friend's attention was a file in the Windows directory named DIARY.CAL and so he downloaded it.

Among everything found on the drive, including several gigs of adult and child porn gifs, personal letters to family and friends, Telix .FON directories with login and passwords included, his DIARY.CAL file proved to be the most interesting file there. The victim, who's name was James Heggie, was keeping a daily diary for almost a year and it contained detailed entries of all the days he was harrassed by our friend. Our friend decided that there could be only one thing to do with a gem like this...mail it to RedBoxChiliPepper so he could publish Jame's humiliation in the next issue of PLA. And so he did.

Sunday, March 30, 1995 Dear Diary,

Today after church I noticed I had several messages on my answering machine concerning my pet parakeets I have for sale. The funny thing is that I would NEVER consider selling Buffy and Polly. I guess the newspaper must have made some sort of mistake. I'll have to call them in the morning and have this taken care of because I've been getting a lot of calls today. Other than that it was a very cheerful day and I had a great time at church.

Monday, April 1, 1995 Dear Diary,

Hecktik day, I must admit. My phone has been ringing non-stop with calls concerning just about everything you can think of, mostly items I have for sale or apartments I have for rent. I called the newspaper to take care of the problem and was astonished to find that the ads were placed using my name and address. Obviously this has been the work of someone playing a very childish prank on me so I removed the ads and that should be the end of it. I only hope that the kids who were responsible will find the lord soon and accept him into their hearts. For now I'll have to leave my phone off the hook.

Tuesday, April 2, 1995 Dear Diary,

Maybe this is all some kind of April Fool's joke that someone is really trying to run into the ground. Still my phone is ringing constantly and I can't even call anybody because when I pick up the phone, there's always somebody on it wanting to buy something from me. I canceled the ads in two of the local papers but who knows how many other papers are carrying the ads. A few people appear to be calling from North Dakota. I asked one woman what number she dialed to reach me and she gave me a number in the (xxx) area code. I dialed the number she gave me and sure enough my call waiting clicked so somehow when people dial that number, they're reaching me instead. I hope the phone companies can correct this problem and I really hope I'm not paying for the long distance. Good-night, dear diary and god bless.

Wednesday, April 3, 1995 Dear Diary,

Extremely rough day at work today. The ads in the newspaper are now giving out my work number at K-Mart as a number to reach me at so I've gotten a million calls there about the ads. This has got to stop but I don't know what to do. My manager is really upset and if I weren't such a good friend to him, he probably would have fired me today for this. A new notice went up on the employee bulletin board stating that personal phone calls were no longer allowed. When I got home I found my boss's mail in my mail box with mail forwarding labels on them all, some from his home and some from work. It's too late to call the post office and take care of this. I'm wondering if I should bring the mail to him in the morning or just throw it away as if I never got it. I suppose I'll have to give him the mail because that's the christian thing to do. I just hope he isn't too angry about it.

Thursday, April 4, 1995 Dear Diary,

I went to the post office to take care of my problems today and discovered that my own mail was being forwarded to Brussells, Belgium which would explain my electricity being shut off last week because of non-payment of my bill. (I never got the bill!!) Hopefully things will settle down now and I can have my peaceful life back the way it was. I must remember to call mom in the morning and tell her about my awful week. She always knows how to make everything all right!

Friday, April 5, 1995 Dear Diary,

Today was a very peaceful day. I didn't get too many calls at work and me and the guys went out after work to prepare for our bible study on Sunday. Saw Dave & Susan there. Had a wonderful time. Life just can't get any better!!

Saturday, April 6, 1995 Dear Diary,

Today has been the worst day of my entire life. Around noon I actually said a swear word!! I was doing a bit of gardening on the side of the house when I noticed a few trucks pull in the driveway at about ten o'clock. I asked them who they were and one said he was there to measure my house so he could give me estimates for my new guttering and the other said he was there to fix my plumbing. I told them both that they were mistaken. Then the pizza cars arrived right behind the taxis and the limousine. The next thing I knew, my street was beginning to fill up with just about every service truck you could imagine. Police cars, tow trucks, roofing repair, cement trucks, painters, lawn care, delivery services, singing telegrams, electricians and a hundred others that I can't even remember. The worse part of it was the newspaper and television reporters. They all claimed that they were contacted on Friday and told that something really amazing was going to happen here at 10:00 today and they kept asking me questions. Most of the service and repair men wanted some sort of compensation for driving all the way to my house but the police said I didn't have to pay anything since I didn't call. Traffic was backed up for an eight block radius for a few hours, all of them wanting to talk to me and after the whole thing was over, I had to go to the police station to fill out a report. Luckily, no charges were filed against me.

Sunday, April 7, 1995 Dear Diary,

Quite an embarrassing day at church. Several members brought newspapers with them asking me about my rather large story on the front page and I had no other choice but to remind everyone that we were there to worship God and not talk about my personal problems. Then, while at church, a delivery man arrived and asked for my signature for a delivery of 30 port-o-potties. Reverend Colwell gave me dirty looks for the rest of the service.

Monday, April 8, 1995 Dear Diary,

After all that's happened to me I decided to call in sick to work today. It's probably best that I did because my boss called this morning yelling that somebody had faxed him 100 pages of nothing but my name. I'm starting to think that maybe I should start looking for some new employment. Other than that it's been sort of a peaceful day. I had to leave the phone off the hook, of course, and everytime somebody knocked at the door or honked their horn out- side it was either a pizza delivery man, a taxi or a limousine. I suppose that I'll just have to get used to this sort of thing. Ah, almost forgot, something seems to be wrong with my America On-Line account. I logged in and had 200 pieces of mail but I know that can't be right because they were all blank.

Tuesday, April 9, 1995 Dear Diary,

Who is Roy? Every time they prank me I hear them saying weird things about some guy named Roy. Who are these people and why do they hate me?? What did I do? Well, I think their fun is about to end because I called Pacific Bell this morning and their giving me a new and unlisted number and they're password protecting my phone account.

Wednesday, April 10, 1995 Dear Diary,

I guess I showed them. I haven't recieved one phone call today and the only thing bad that's happened is that they keep sending pizzas to my house. Now how childish are these people, sending pizzas to me?? Like that's really going to have any effect on me.

Thursday, April 11, 1995 Dear Diary,

Well, my unlisted number solution didn't last too long. Already a new ad has appeared in the paper, listing my computer for sale for $200 and my phone has been ringing all day. At work, the new schedule came out and my hours have been cut by about 20 hours this week. When I got home, I couldn't get in either door because both had peices of metal shoved into the locks. I had to call the land lord at midnight to come over, then he made me call the police. As a last resort we had to bust open the kitchen window. The locksmith won't be here until tomorrow afternoon. I still haven't figured out who's responsible for all of this. Perhaps a local bbser? I don't remember making enemies with anyone.

Friday, April 12, 1995 Dear Diary,

Quite a normal day today. When I woke up there were Hustler centerfolds taped on every one of my windows, facing inwards so whatever window I looked out of I saw Miss January. I have to admit, out of all their pranks, this one turned me on the most. I left them up until afternoon and just stared out the windows all day and touched myself. It was great.

Saturday, April 13, 1995 Dear Diary,

Quit my job at K-Mart. Me & the boss got in a fight over another one of their pranks. Seems one of them must have hacked into a demolition service's computer and changed a few orders around and half of K-Mart was torn down early this morning. I don't know why the boss is so mad at ME, I didn't do it. They also had orders to tear down my own house but luckily the wrecking crew got that order mixed up (or maybe it was a type-o?) and knocked down the guy's house across the street from me which is actually a pretty good deal for me because they were always playing that loud satanic music all the time late at night and they never listened to me when I went over there to preach to them.

Sunday, April 14, 1995 Dear Diary,

Good sermon today. I locked alot of the sunday school children in the basement while everyone was upstairs and as far as I know, the parents are still looking for them. I keep hearing all these weird voices in my head and I think it's God talking to me but I'm not sure. Why does God want me to go to all the pet stores in town and buy gerbils?? Earlier this evening, my car got towed out of my driveway. I don't know why, but it did. I just sat at the window and watched the man tow it while I drooled on myself. I also got an e-mail message from those guys harrassing me and they gave me their e-mail address. It's one of those weird addresses that aren't on the AOL service and the address is president@whitehouse.gov, so obiously this guy is the president of some company. I e-mailed him back and told him exactly what I think of him and what I'm going to do to him when I get my hands on him.

Monday, April 15, 1995 Dear Diary,

Time went by so slowly today becuase I have nothing to do since I lost my job. Several delivery companies came today and gave me things that I didn't order, including 18 dozen roses. How do these people afford these things? My phone stopped working again and my power went off around noon. I also recieved my phone bill and the total on it is $3813.23 so I guess they made some kind of mistake on my bill. I'm thinking about moving and starting life over.

Tuesday, April 16, 1995 Dear Diary,

Mom called. She says that she would have called sooner but her phone was shut off along with her electricity, gas and water and someone had boarded up all the windows and wedged the doors shut and she had finally escaped by going in the basement and digging a tunnel into the next door neighbors basement.

[The rest of the diary was just too gruesome to publish. No wait, that's not it, the rest of it all got wiped out in a freak hard drive accident. No, that's not it either, I just don't feel like making anymore of it up. Yeah, that's the reason. But if you'd like to get the real James Heggie's comments on this story, you can give him a ring by dialing 403-340-2267. He's sitting by the phone, afraid to leave the house...]

Annoying The Hell Out Of Operators - RBCP

OPER: U.S. West, how may I help you?
RBCP: Yes, is there any way you can op divert a toll free number for me so that
      the long distance company doesn't get my ANI and I can make fraudulent
      calls with my stolen calling card numbers?
OPER: What?
RBCP: Could you dial a toll free number for me?
OPER: Sure, what's the number?
RBCP: 1-800-673-7286 (1-800-OPERATOR)
OPER: Okay. (Puts the call through) Thank you for calling with U.S.West.
RBCP: Yeah, well it's not as if I had a whole lot of choice here, now is it?
      Who else did you expect me to call with? U.S.West is the only company
      out there for me to op divert my calls. What's WITH you??
OPER: Thank you. (Call goes through)
AT&T: AT&T, could I have the number that you're calling from?
RBCP: You don't have the number I'm calling from?
AT&T: No, the computer didn't pick that up.
RBCP: That's crazy, I wonder why it didn't pick it up.
AT&T: I'm not sure could I have the number you're calling from?
RBCP: So if you don't have my number I could give you someone else's number
      and then when I use stolen fraudulent calling cards it wouldn't get
      traced back to me but to the number I gave you, right?
AT&T: I have no idea, sir.
RBCP: Or I could tell you a number closer to the number I'm calling and that
      way I'd get a cheaper long distance rate, right?
AT&T: Sir, do you need to make a phone call or not?
RBCP: I'm calling from 512-703-89 uh, oh...let's say 57.
AT&T: Okay, could I have the number you're calling?
RBCP: Yes, I'm making a harrassing phone call to 403-340-2267.
AT&T: Did you say harrassing?
RBCP: No.
AT&T: And your billing?
RBCP: The calling card that I ordered in someone else's name and I'm using for
      fraudulent purposes is 616-xxx-xxxx-xxxx.
AT&T: (Puts my call through without even saying thank you.)


 OCI: OCI, can I help you?
RBCP: LET ME TALK TO YOUR FUCKING SUPERVISOR RIGHT NOW!
 OCI: One minute please...
      This is the Rolonda, may I help you?
RBCP: Hi, Rolonda.
 OCI: Operator leaving line.
RBCP: Why?
 OCI: Because you're the same person that was doing this all day yesterday.


Conversation with a Sprint operator using their 102520 code...
SPRT: This is Sprint, can I help you?
RBCP: I just needed to find out how the weather is in Wynonna, Minnesota today.
SPRT: Excuse me?
RBCP: I didn't say anything.
SPRT: You need a weather report? Where are you?
RBCP: I'm in Texas and you're in Wynonna, Minnesota, right?
SPRT: I'm not allowed to give out that information.
RBCP: Well, you saying that only proves that I'm right. If I was wrong, you'd
      say, "No, I'm not in Minnesota" but you didn't, therefore I'm right.
SPRT: How do you know we're in Minnesota?
RBCP: Because you're sitting in a building on Third & Johnson Commercial
      Court. And you drive a blue car.
SPRT: I don't drive a blue car. (Goes and gets her supervisor...)
SUPR: This is Dan, can I help you?
RBCP: Are you or are you not on Third Street in Wynonna, Minnesota??
SUPR: Who are you calling?
RBCP: I'm calling the Sprint office in Wynonna, Minnesota, Dan.
SUPR: Well, do you need to place a call or not?
RBCP: No, not really, I just wanted to annoy you people.
SUPR: How are you doing there in Corpus Christi, Texas?
RBCP: Ooooooo, you've got my city but do you have my number? I have yours and
      it's 507-454-8366. Let's see you top that one, Dan.
SUPR: We know exactly who you are and if you don't stop calling here we're
      going to send the police over.
RBCP: And?
                (I get hung up on)
Try using OCI who doesn't use ANI and scientific studies have shown that they hire the lamest, stupidest operators in the world. You can be as mean as you want to them and they won't hang up, they'll just throw insults right back at you. Best of all, they'll believe anything you tell them. Dial 1-800-288-2880. When you hear the dial tone, hit 0 a couple of times until you get a live operator. Have a good time.

Deeply Disturbed Tells His Story

A TWAT Production - by SPiNALBOB

[The following is a file that I'm reprinting without permission taken from the TWAT zine and written on June 19, 1994. If you haven't heard of TWAT then call Whombat Communications and download a copy today. -RedBoxChiliPepper]

Well... this is SPiNALB0B of [FaT]. And I would like to say a couple lines before the interview. Deeply Disturbed is a troubled boy, and needs to be helped. If you could help by donating money, to pay for his upcoming therapy, it would be greatly appreciated. I failed to get the address to send the money to in my haste to leave after the interview (I had to catch a plane). If you could contact Deeply Disturbed, than you can probably get the address from him. Deeply Disturbed can be reached on IRC as deeply_d on the k00l chanel #ANSI or #NATiON whichever one is more 31337. He could have been reached via k0deline, but...

 SB: Testing...  Testing...  One...  Two...  Three...  Alright, let's see.
     This is SPiNALB0B interviewing Deeply Disturbed on June 15, 1994.  OK,
     Are you ready?
 DD: Yeah, I think.
 SB: OK, Deeply Disturbed, can I call you Deeply?
 DD: No.
 SB: Allright...  Uhh....  Now for my first question.
 DD: Fire away.
 SB: How did you get into the ANSi Scene?
 DD: It all started two years ago in WWiVNet.  I was CoSysOp on a WWiV board
     called THE K-K00L WAREZ PALACE, Ottowa's only 2400 baud WWiV WaReZ board,
     and I was looking through the message basses, which I usually don't do.
 SB: And why was that.
 DD: I only had a 2400 baud modem, and I spent all my time downloading WaReZ.
     I was CoSysOp because I was the only person who called except for a
     friend of mine, who's handle was Lord Chester.  Anyway, I had downloaded
     all the warez that were on his BBS at the time, and decided to just call
     and see what the board was really like.  I discoverd WWiVNet.  It was
     amazing.  So many neat and interesting people were on there.  I was in
     total awe of one sub in particular: THE ANSI BIN.  I was mystified by
     the neat blocks on the screen.  I decided then and there to get a VGA
     monitor.  I only had a monochrome then.  The next day I had my friend
     Lord Chester walk up to the guy in Radio Shack and ask him to show him
     the new CD players.
 SB: Yes, this is all very interesting.  Go on...
 DD: And while he was, I grabbed a VGA monitor and card, and ran out of the
     store.  I had my Bart Halloween mask on, so nobody would know it was me.
 SB: And what did you do then?
 DD: I took it home and set it up. I unzipped my registered copy of THEDRAW,
     which I had never used, but I had gotten because it was a ware.  I then
     started to draw.  I got so much into it, that I stayed up four days
     straight drawing ANSi.  My first picture was of my dog, Peaty.  It was
     cool.  I showed it to Chester, and he got so excited he got an erection.
     He was so happy, because he had never gotten an erection before.  Neither
     had I, but that's another story.
 SB: Uhh... yes... good.
 DD: Anyway, I spread it on the other local boards, and the SysOps of the
     local boards liked it.  I started doing ads for Remote Access boards. In
     a couple months I was up to WIldcat and Spitfire Logon Screens.  I had
     been saving up my lunch money for a while, and when I got enough, I went
     and bought a 14.4 modem.  I was so excited!  I got home, and was shaking
     so hard, I had to get my mom to install it.
 SB: Yes, and then?
 DD: Well...  A couple months later I joined a local ANSi group called [MaTH].
 SB: What does [MaTH] stand for?
 DD: I don't know.  I never asked.  I just thought it was cool.  Ayyway, I
     drew for them for a while, and then moved on to another group, [KKAP]
     which stands for K-Kool Ansi People.  After that I moved from group to
     group until I finally joined ACiD.  It was so amazing.  I got to meet
     really awesome people that had no lives just like me.  My friend Lord
     Chester now draws for iCE.  He started a couple weeks after I did,
     because he wanted to do some menus for his new GT Power board.  His
     current handle is Dark Wolf.
 SB: You mean the artist of that Excellent Suicidal Shrimp ANSi?
 DD: I think so.  I don't know.  All I remember is his ANSi of two guys doing
     the "horizontal polka."  That one is my favorite ANSi ever made.
 SB: Uhhhh...  OK...
 DD: Anyway... I now draw for NATiON.  It's really keen.  I love it there.
     I like talking to my fellow members like Maestro, Sociopath, and Mr.
     Sinister.  They are all always on the Boards like me, so they're cool.
 SB: Shure.  I have another question.
 DD: Hold up, I think my mom is coming...  ALLRIGHT MOM!!!!  I PROMISE NOT
     TO WEAR YOUR CLOTHES ANYMORE!!!!  I CAN'T COME NOW!!!  I'M TALKING TO MY
     FRIEND!!!  NO, HE'S NOT GAY!!!  THAT'S MY OTHER FRIENDS!!!  Anyway, fire
     away.
 SB: Uhhh...  Ok, when do you draw ANSi's?
 DD: I usually stay on my computer all day.  I quit school to draw ANSI, so
     I have alot of time to draw.
 SB: Do you do speed or anything to stay awake?
 DD: Speed?  What's that?  Is that that new movie?  I read about it in the
     FedNet music sub.  No, I usually stick a stick up my ass, which keeps
     me awake, and makes me feel real happy at the same time.
 SB: Do you ever regret being an ANSi dude.
 DD: NEVER!
 SB: You swear?
 DD: Uhhh...  Sometimes I think about running away, getting married to
     Chester, and moving to San Francisco, so I don't have to worry about
     ANSi anymore, but when I start to draw, it just all goes away, and I
     become one with the screen.
 SB: What do your parents think of this?
 DD: They hate it, but then, I hate my parents.  My mom hates it when I put
     on her clothes, and my dad has hated me since he caught me screwing Peaty
     in my closet one day.  But that all is gone when I draw ANSi, and all I
     have to worry about is if my ANSi makes the next pack in time, or if
     I'll get accepted to the new ANSi boards, or how long my k0dez will last.
 SB: Well...

Phone Losers of America Headline News

Halting Harassment - taken from the Belleville News-Democrat, Sept. 7, 1995

The information superhighway has plenty of bumps on it, as seven metro-east families know all too well. They've been targeted for phone harrassment by a computer hackers group. Since their names and phone numbers were added to a "hit list" on computer bulletin boards, they've received pizzas they didn't order, bills for phone calls they didn't make and harrassing and obscene phone calls. It's the technological equivalent of someone writing a name and number on a restroom wall, only with a much larger audience. The harassment has come from as far away as Sweden.

A lot of people no doubt see this as another reason why computer networks ought to be regulated by the federal government. But we don't need bureaucrats policing cyberspace. Enforcement would be difficult if not impossible, and there's the issue of freedom of speech.

That doesn't mean that people should have to put up with harassment. It says right in the front of the phone book that it's a criminal offense for anyone to make obscene or harassing phone calls. And obviously it's illegal to charge food and phone calls and other items in someone else's name. Why aren't the police and the phone companies doing more to catch the culprits?

The phone companies' biggest piece of advice is for people to not give out their phone number to strangers. That suggestion is weak. One of the families paid $50 to switch to an unpublished number, and the hackers had it within a week.

How did the hackers get the number? Most of them are in their teens and early 20s. Has a group of kids outsmarted the phone company and all the technology at its disposal? The phone companies need to beat the hackers at their own game and track them down. Then the police

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