From: Mykel Board/Seidboard <70253.1774@CompuServe.COM>
These are zines and stuff Mykel has.  Mykel publishes "Nothing But
Record Reviews" and keeps that promise.
Posted 1 August, 1992.  All reviews by Mykel Board.  This document is
Shareright 1992.  You may reproduce and distribute this information
freely as long as others may do so.  Printing this Shareright notice and
creditting Mykel will make you a mensch.


ARCHIE MCPHEE Catalog

PO Box 30852
Seattle WA  98103
Format:  8 1/4 x 10 3/4 newsprint 64 pgs
This  is the place to go for all your rubber chicken needs.  From
keychains to full size, they got 'em all.  plus fake noses, lunch
boxes from the  fifties,  collectors  salt  and  pepper  shakers,
rubber  ants.   The  catalog  is  camp for heteros.  Funny little
drawings, and cute insets.  Lots of paperweights.  My  faves  are
the  plastic  finger  nuns,  but  the  "eyeballman"  runs a close
second.  $1

BLUE RYDER

PO Box 587
Olean NY  14760
Format:  4pg newspaper
An eclectic combinatio of zine reviews, think pieces  (eg.  "What
is  freedom?")  reprints,  and  some  of  the weirdest ads you're
likely  to  see.   (How  about  ordering   the   book   "Celibacy
Guaranteed"  the  shows  how priests and other clergymen can keep
themselves pure through  castration?)   Free,  but  send  $1  for
postage.

CRYPTIC TYMES

23 Nelson St #3
Kingston ON  K7L 3W6
Format:  8 1/2 x 11 93pgs
Somebody's  got a friend at the printshop!  Wow, a big thick zine
with not all that many  ads.   Editor  Alan  Wright   focuses  on
psychedelic  bands  from  the  present  to  the  past, especially
Canadian ones.  He's not a purist though,  and  takes  others  to
task for having too limited tastes.
Fun graphics, a report on the Olympia Pop convention, with plenty
of  interviews  and  reviews.   No  price listed, but it's easily
worth $5.

DREGS
                                                   PO Box 110
c/o Duncan Dregs
Liverpool L69 8DP
Format:  A4
The true love issue.  Plenty  of  bands  (including,  of  course,
NIRVANA).   Discharge  interview,  Also loves stories, a guide to
hitching in England,  Mykel Board's "My  Life  As  A  Girl"  true
story  and  ACADEMY 23's (formerly THE APOSTELS) "friendship is a
myth" think piece. Plenty of zine and comic reviews too.  $2

Predictions & Prescriptions

2060 Broadway,(460)
Boulder CO  80302
Format:  8 1/2 x 11 2 color, 12 pgs
Published by the INTERNATIONAL PROFESSIONAL TRAINERS  GUILD  this
newsletter is aimed at "Managers, Leaders and Key Personnel."  It
has  tips on managing people and organizations.  Articles include
tips on how to listen and how to minimise your time in jail under
the new Federal Corporate Sentencing guidlines.  There  are  tips
on  how  to  be a winner and a "checklist for change."  There are
lots of little boxes with quotes in them.  My  favorite:   "Rules
are  made  when  brains  run  out."  Sample on request.  Reg cost
$60/year.

PSYCHOTRONIC
                                                   Dept. PV
151 First Ave
New York NY  10003
Format:  7 3/4 x 10 1/2 72pgs
Started by the mainman of  the  PSYCHOTRONIC  film  encyclopedia,
this  zine  covers all aspects of weird movies.  Concentrating on
B-movies, they have reviews, film, video and record reviews (This
issue has Russ Meyer's Tura Satana.), obits (Fred MacMurray, Bert
Parks, Freddie Mercury & others more obscure), and  a  continuing
literary  spar  between  David  Carradine  and  one of his former
directors.

TFP Newsletter

PO Box 121
Pleasantville NY  10570
Format:  8 1/4 x 11
>From  the  city  that  brings  you  READER'S  DIGEST  comes  this
newsleter  from  the  society  for the preservation of TRADITION,
FAMILY and PROPERTY.  They still believe  communism's  a  threat,
and they talk a lot about God and the Catholic church.  Suffering
is  good,  they  say,  especially  for  other  people.  Under the
heading "Forgotten Truths" is  "Inequality  is  a  condition  for
social harmony."  Free for the asking.

The Independent Music Producers Society Journal

70 Route 202 N
Peterborough NH  03458
Format:  tabloid, 8 pgs
The  subheading  on  this  one  is "Mission: To increase sales of
Independent Music."  It's a nuts and bolts how-to paper for indie
labels.  This one is filled with "Start-up" stories  including  a
long  one by Terry Tolken of No. 6 Records.  A lot of the news is
depressing, considering the current state of  indie-ness,  that's
understandable.   The  paper  is  filled with info, including the
latest dope on  a  new  copy-protection  scheme  SCMS  (pronounce
SCAMS!).


Black Ink, White Paper
11 x 14 folded

c/o Brian
 619 Elmwood
 Wave (2)
Buffalo NY 14222
A Punk-with-a-capital-P zine,  half hand written/drawn,
half typed all in caps.  Xeroxed on dads toner-needing
office copier, staples over the words.  Interviews with
Tesco Vee and a bunch bands nobody every heard of.  A
revolt against anything that smacks of desk-top.

ELNA UPDATE
4 pg 8 1/2 x 11
c/o Esperanto League for North America
 Box 1129
El Cerrito CA 94530
This is probably free for the asking, although a $1
contribution wouldn't hurt.  Inside is an ad for an
Esperanto book and some language news from around the
world.  There's a reprint of an article about how English
speakers don't learn other languages.  There's another
article on the unfairness of English-Only Sceintific
conferences.  (And how that leans to lack of information
exchange.)
  Their attitude is commendable, except for a stupid push
toward English spelling reform.  Yes, it's tough to learn
the way it is, but our spelling makes a deeper sense.  You
might say that the "g" in "sign" is "unnecessary."  But it
pops out in the word "signature," and is necessary if you
want to relate those words.
     The esperanto folks do well in pushing for an
easy-to-learn universal second language.  They should leave
the first languages alone.

Font & Function
10" x 15"

c/o Adobe Systems Inc.
 1585 Charleston Rd.
Mountain View CA 94039-7900
This is kind of a promozine for Adobe computer typefaces,
but it's more than a catalog.  There are hundreds of
examples of all kinds of typefaces as well as an article or
two.  This issue, for example, explains the history of the
ampersand.  (You know, &.)  If you're involved with any
kind of publishing or printing, this is worth a look, and
you probably can scam one for free if you write a nice
letter to the company.

Psychiatric Petting Zoo
11 x 14 folded

c/o Bob Conrad
 PO Box 9382
Reno NV 89507
This is somewhere between a zine and a prose chapbook. It's
got heavy paper outside with photos and inside there are
poems, newsclippings and personal reports.  It's about
Bob's life at the University in Reno and it doesn't sound
like a fun place to be.  My favorite, though is a reprint
about a huge purple furnace left on campus that kept
repeating FUCK!  in a loud taped voice.


THE VOLUNTEER
8 1/2 x 11 15 pgs

c/o GMHC
 129 West 20 ST
New York NY 10011
This is the paper put out by the GAY MEN'S HEALTH CRISIS in
New York.  That's a support group and organizing force for
gay men with AIDS in NYC.  This issue focuses on an AIDS
rally to march to the Democratic Convention in New York.
There's also a section on "Living With AIDS" and AIDS in
Puerto Rico. Its a good information source with outreach
and coverage of more groups than Gay Men in New York.

Trans Tabloid

c/o CKCU FM, 517 Unicentre
 Carleton University
Ottawa ON K1S 5B6
This is the college radio station program guide with
concert reviews, editorials and ads.  The focus is local
with a Rheos interview and a story on the Ottawa Jazz
Festival.  Also stories on THE WEDDING PRESENT and SKINNY
PUPPY.

We Are The Weird
8 1/2 x 11 16pgs

PO Box 2002
Dallas TX 75221
The newletter put out by drive-in king Joe Bob Briggs.
Besides expected sleaze movie reviews, this issue has the
best analysis, & solution to the LA riots I've read.
(Mercy for all sides, the cops and the rioters!)  Plus the
Hubie awards and plenty of news and views.  From this issue
alone I've added CLASS OF 1999, NEW JACK CITY, and NIGHTIE
NIGHTMARE to my must-see list.



THIS WAS YOUR LIFE (Chick Publication, PO Box 662, Chino CA
91708-0662): Jack Chick is a true Christian.  This comic tells
the life of a pretty well-to-do guy who dies and finds he's
condemned to hell.  It seems he told a couple of dirty stories
when he was a kid. He looked lustfully at a woman.  He disobeyed
his parents.  For that God sends him into an eternal pit of fire.
Nice God you Christians have-- I'm glad I'm not one of you.

ACTION & DEFENCE: This History of the I.M.W.U. First Five Years
1986-1991 From [IMWU 4072 East 22 Street (306) Tucson AZ  85711]
That's the address listed inside this zine, although the head-
quarters have since moved to San Francisco.  This is a record of
the activities of the International Music Workers Union, and a
statement of philosophy.  My favorite part, Autumn 1990, Mykel
Board's ridiculous comments in DEC. MRR challenged by IMWU Intl.
Board apologizes, prints follow up in Mar. 91 MRR.  John Crawford
(Baboon Dooly Cartoonist) write IMWU about this.  He says Board
is a stoolie for Tim Yo. editor/MRR.

UNDER THE VOLCANO Vol 1 No.2 [PO Box 236, Nesconset NY 11767]
Mostly indy music reviews, letters, poems, a think piece, a Dear
Abby parody that vies with Dear Dotty for snottiness-- and $5
classifieds.

THE BEE-KO BULLETIN [7 East 47 Street, NYC 10017] Tips for the
artist (eg. soak and dry your watercolor papers before you paint
on them.  The colors'll be brighter.) There are also ads and
promos for items carried by the BEEKO art supplies store.

COMPUSERVE MAGAZINE: New User Edition [Compuserve Inc. 5000
Arlington Centre Blvd., Columbus OH  43220] The introductory
edition of the magazine for users of the Compuserve electronic
information system.  This lets you know some of the stuff you can
spend your money on.  There are some useful tips here about the
20 cent a minute service.  BTW, COMPUSERVE has it all over
PRODIGY-- a new graphics based service that charges a flat
monthly fee and gives you just about nothing for your money.
Unless you have a supercomputer, the PRODIGY graphics are as slow
as an erection on an alcoholic.  (Compuserve is text based and
fast.)  Besides, blind or visually impaired users are unable to
use PRODIGY with speech synthesis.  If you have money to spend
over the phone go COMPUSERVE.

PUNKS WITH PONYTAILS #5 [c/o Dave!, 1891 Valley View Rd.,
Hollister CA 95023]Punk, parody punk and anti-poetry poetry mates
with fake interviews, layout from drug hell, fake show reviews,
fake think pieces by fake REAL people.  This is was punk was when
punk was punk.  My favorite part, from the interview with Dave:
Mykel Board owes me money! (hand jobs are $7 now, due to
inflation.)  He wasn't drunk, just giddy (like a schoolgirl.)  I
didn't contract the clap from him, but I did steal his watch.  He
told me to call him "Alice."

LOOMPANICS UNLIMITED 1991 MAIN CATALOG [Loompanics, PO Box 1197,
Port Townsend WA 98368] The subtitle of this amazing catalog is
"The Best Book Catalog In The World."  Here we've got a case of
hyperbole matching reality.  Loompanics believes in No More
Secrets, No More Excuses, No More Limits.  They believe that
there's no information that the government should have that you
shouldn't.  So you can buy a multi-volume series on How to Kill,
a book on How to Beat The Credit Bureaus, manuals for body
guards, and those who want to defeat them.  There's also plenty
of libertarian theoretical books as well as books on how to get
your own ideas out (media manipulation, printing your own
fanzine, etc.)  The 250+ page catalog costs five bucks.  It's
worth more.

BLACK GOLD INFORMER [Rt2 Box 121, Elmore City OK  73035] This is
the newsletter published by the Black Gold Llama ranch.  I'm not
making this up.  You can find out everything you need to know
about how Black Gold raises llamas in the US.  There's a "Meet
The Sires" section with equal time to "The Black Gold Girls."  If
you're interested in buying a llama, or want ideas for going into
business for yourself-- this is where to check it out.

WEEKLY WORLD NEWS 8/13/91 [PO Box 11286, Des Moines IA  50340-
1286] This newspaper is one of the many reasons I love America.
One in a series, this headline reads, Elvis Photo Taken Just Days
Ago and it sure looks like him on the cover, right there at the
ticket window buying entrance to SILENCE OF THE LAMBS.  Inside is
the usual mix of gossip, sensationalized real news, and total
fiction that make this newspaper great.  My favorite is about
some African archeologist who discover a rare dinosaur egg.
During the night, however, their native guides cook and eat it.

NEW SENSE BULLETIN 5/91 [PO Box 42211, Los Angeles CA  90042]
This is science with a taste of new age.  They write about faith
healing, homeopathy and other non-traditional medicine.  They're
not spacey though, and they seem willing to report on both sides
of a believability controversy.  Most interesting here is an
analysis of "professional skeptics" who seem to require more
evidence than regular chemists and physicists.

DOWNTOWN EXPRESS 8/1/91 [c/o Enlightenment Press Crop, 56 West 22
St. New York NY]  This is the local paper for the Lower Manhattan
area.  The headline's about a neighborhood fight against a
proposed botanical garden.  (Will it lower the property values?)
There's the usual classifieds, dining out and movie review
sections.  They also list movie ratings by other papers and Ebert
& whatsisname.  Seems the NY Times is the only one I agree with.
Something must be wrong with me.

INCREDIBLE INQUIRY CATALOG [c/o Fry's Inc. Inq., HC 76, Box 2207,
Garden Valley ID  83622]  If you want to find out about reading
folk's personality from their face, or maybe rent a video on UFOs
or the coming cataclysm, this is the place to shop.  How about
the truth about God?  (He's really the Prince of Darkness.)  You
want to order a book that'll change your life giving you
"abilities most persons only dream about?"  This (unfortunately
poorly printed) catalog is weirder than Loompanics-- and far less
violent.  Still, like it's thinker cousin, you can leave it
around with the surety that your visitors will depart that much
sooner.

