Subject: Firesign Theatre: Lexicon

Date: 23 Jul 1993 23:17:13 GMT

Organization: Jet Propulsion Labs

Lines: 784

Summary: This posting contains a lexicon of terms and concepts
        which appear in Firesign Theatre plays and productions.

Last-modified: 1993/07/23

Version:       1.3

Changes:

  1. Modified: {ANCHOVIES}, {BOTTLES}
  2. New: {CONFIDENCE IN THE SYSTEM} {SUGAR}, {BEAR WHIZ BEER}, {SEEKER}
  3. First posting to actually appear in "answers"!

  Side 4) The Firesign Theatre: Lexicon and Concordance File
  ==========================================================


[A]
---

ALVARADO: {PICO}'s sidekick, as in "It's Pico and Alvarado". From the 
streets Pico and Alvarado in Los Angeles. PICO and ALVARADO are both 
{BEANERS}. They are featured in the plays {BOZOS},{DWARF}, as well as 
others. {NICK DANGER} had to swim down Alvarado to his convertable
during a severe rain storm. Pico and Alvarado sometimes like to
yell, "{PARK} it and Lock it! Not Responsible!"

ANCHOVIES: Small fish with beady little eyes. We first encounter
anchovies in {DWARF}, when George Tirebiter calls a pizza parlor
(note the name of the pizza joint he calls):

   GEORGE [mumbling]: Let's see...Ocelots. Paupers. Pipe-nipples,
          Polombras, Pizzas! Armenian Gardens...Hank's Juggernaut...
          New Leviathan...Nick's Swell...
   SOUND: HE PICKS UP THE PHONE AND DIALS. THE NEWSCAST GOES ON.
   < Broadcast deleted>
   GEORGE [phoning]: Uh, this is George Tirebiter, Camden N 200 R.
          [pause] Uh, I want to order a pizza to go, and no anchovies.
          [pause] What ? [clicks phone] Oh, man! Nobody will come
          up here at all!

Apparently, Tirebiter mistakenly called {NICK DANGER}, in the
episode, "Cut 'Em Off at the Past". On that album, we hear the
same conversation, but from the other side of the phone:

   ANNOUNCER: He walks in! He's ready for mystery...he's ready for
              excitement! He's ready for anything...he's...
   SOUND:     TELEPHONE PICKED UP
   NICK:      Nick Danger, Third Eye!
   GEORGE:    (ON FILTER) Uh-I wanna order a pizza to go, and no 
              anchovies.
   NICK:      No anchovies? You've got the wrong man. I spell
              my name...Danger!   [click]
   GEORGE:    (FILTER) What?
   MUSIC:     "NICK DANGER" THEME IN AND UNDER.

Note: This is a direct quote from the "Big Mystery" Joke book, and
so the attribution of "GEORGE" to the guy on the other side of the
phone is the FT's, not an inference (some people thought it was
the voice of the teenage Porgie that called Nick).

In another episode of Nick Danger, "The case of the Missing Yolks"
(Video), and the "Three faces of Al" (album), Rocky {ROCOCO} calls
up Nick at the start of the play, and turns everything around:

  ROCKY: I want to order an anchovy to go, and hold the pizza.
  NICK:  Anchovies?
  ROCKY: Yeah, those little black things, with eyes!
  NICK:  You've got the wrong man. I spell my name
         (LOOKS BACK AT THE DOOR) ...REGNAD.


ARTIE CHOKE: A {HOLOGRAM} in the FT's {BOZO} play. Artie, the Lonesome 
Beet and the Whisperin' Squash were all once intended to be characters 
in an FT western radio show, featuring an all-vegetable cast.

AUSTIN: Philip Austin, one of the FT members. 

[B]
---

BABE: The name of {EVERYMAN} in the FT's play {TWO PLACES}.

BBOP: Not Bee-bop, but the FT's "Big Book of Plays".

BEAR WHIZ BEER: A popular beverage in FT plays, heard in both
{EYKIW} and in {YOLKS}. "It's in the water! that's why it's yellow!"

BERGMAN: Peter Bergman, one of the FT members.

BOB BUNNY: A fifteen year-old kid, who is the side-kick of {MARK TIME} 
of the Circum-Solar Federation. He is also a fan of {YOUNG GUY}, Motor 
Detective, and asks him the {PORRIDGE BIRD} question.

BOTTLES: {MUDHEAD}'s crazy hopped-up girlfriend, in Porgie {TIREBITER}
movies. She is played by Barbara Bobo.

BOZOS: A Bozo likes to {CLONE} and be with other Bozos. One of the 
{FIVE LIFESTYLES OF MAN}, according to the FT. Honk! Honk! See also 
{BEANERS}, {BOOGIES}, {ZIPS} and {BERZERKERS}. Featured in the FT 
play,"I Think Were All Bozos's on this Bus".

BEANERS: A non-offensive term derived from the ethnically offensive 
one, referring to the lifestyle rather than the race. One of the {FIVE 
LIFESTYLES OF MAN}, according to the FT.

BEATLES: A 60's Rock-and-Roll group (I can't believe I actually would
have to explain this, but I do). Many FT terms are Beatles references:

In {NICK DANGER}:

  Rocky Rococo: A play on "Rocky Raccoon" 
  Catherwood:  says "Goo-goo-goo-joob" (ref: "I am the Walrus"),
     and then says "I'm so tired, I haven't slept a wink"
  Nick: says his story has more holes in it than the Albert Hall.

In {HEMLOCK STONES}, they also sing "Get Back" at the end.

One of the kids in "Le Trent Huit Cunegonde" was named "Malcom X.
John Lennon"

BERZERKERS: One of the {FIVE LIFESTYLES OF MAN}, according to the FT.

BMJB: The FT's "Big Mystery Joke Book", containing the transcripts
of {HEMLOCK STONES} Sumatran Rat play, {NICK DANGER}'s "Cut 'Em Off
at the Past" play, "Temporarily Humboldt County", "{MARK TIME}" from
the "Dear Friends" album, "{YOUNG GUY}", motor detective, and others.

BOOGIES:A non-offensive term derived from the ethnically offensive one, 
referring to the lifestyle rather than the race. One of the {FIVE 
LIFESTYLES OF MAN}, according to the FT.

BRADSHAW: Lieutenant Alvin Bradshaw, in the FT police forces. Loosely 
based on the Officer Bradshaw from the old Highway Patrol episodes, 
Bradshaw is constantly pestering the private investigators {NICK 
DANGER} and his Javanese counterpart {YOUNG GUY}, Motor Detective. 
{YOUNG GUY} once discovered that "BRAD" stands for "Bernard", 
indicating that Bradshaw is actually "George Bernard Shaw, famous 
author and riterary smart-guy".

[C]
---

CELLOPHANE: An {SFX} tool, used to simulate fire on radio. In {NICK
DANGER}, Catherwood asks if he Nick wants to pull his "cues" out
of the cellophane before they scorch. See also {CORNSTARCH}.

CHEESE: Many types of CHEESE appear in FT skits: {GORGONZOLA} the 
Cheese-monster, Cheese-Logs, Cheese-Log-Throws, not to mention {RATS}. 

CLEM: The {EVERYMAN} of the FT play {BOZOS}. Also known as "UhClem" to 
the main computer in the {FUTURE FAIR}.

CLONE: To either replicate yourself into a {HOLOGRAM}, or to act like 
all the other {BOZO}S.

CONFIDENCE IN THE SYSTEM: A timely drug. Here's an advertisement for it 
by the FT on Ben Bland's All Day Matinee on the "Just Folks" album.  :

You know, this is the midst of the disillusionment and heartbreak season 
and,with the recent outbreak of that suicidal strain of despair up in 
Boston,well, you'd better keep a close watch on your emotions.  So 
remember the seven danger signals of depression; that's a general and 
lasting feeling of hope-lessness, inability to concentrate, loss of 
self-esteem, fear of rejection, feelings of guilt, misdirected anger, 
and extreme dependency on others.  At the first sign of these symptoms, 
friends, follow these simple rules:  keep working, drink as much as 
possible, and... take your television's advice. And y'know more TV's 
recommend an amazing new psychic breakthrough than any other, and 
that's... Confidence in the System.  Fast, safe, and guaranteed through 
constant Federal control, Confidence in the System will keep THEM in 
power longer, longer, longer, and tend to calm and obscure the miseries 
of disillusionment and despair.  In easy-to-swallow Propaganda form or  
new fast-acting Thought Control, that's Confidence in the System. So 
have some... today.


CORNSTARCH: Used to simulate snow in {NICK DANGER}. Catherwood asks
Nick to come in out of the Cornstarch and dry his mucklucks by the
fire.

[D]
---

DCTDHMTP: Don't Crush That {DWARF}, Hand Me the Pliers!.

DOCTOR MEMORY: The big computer that runs everything in the {FUTURE 
FAIR}, described in the FT's {BOZO} play. The Doctor was also mentioned 
in a poem on the "Dear Friends" album. He is based on an old SAILON 
LISP program written for the PDP-10 running the TOPS-10 operating 
system.

DWARF: "Don't Crush That Dwarf, Hand Me The Pliers": An FT play about 
the life of the {EVERYMAN} George {TIREBITER}. The title appears to be 
a marijuana reference.  "Dwarf" is slang for a marijuana cigarette 
which has been almost completely consumed (ie, "roach") and the 
"pliers" are pliers or any other device which can be used to hold the 
dwarf by the very end in order to consume the rest of the cigarette 
("roach clip").  Hence, "don't crush that nearly-consumed marijuana 
cigarette, hand me a pair of pliers (so that I can smoke the rest)."
This could also be tied in to Hal Roach, the famous producer of old 
silent comedies, who only recently died at the age of 100+. He is given 
a brief mention at the end of "Dwarf", when {TIREBITER}'S secretary 
indicates that Mr. Roach had left a message, along with Laurel & Hardy, 
Harpo Marx ("Honk! Honk!- he would leave his name..") The FT sometimes 
refer to a "Hot Roach Studios", which they presumably ran.

{ROCKY ROCOCO}, the nemesis of {NICK DANGER}, is a dwarf:

  CATHER: "Nancy, who's that ugly dwarf with his hand in your mouth?" 
  ROCKY:  "Rocky Rococo, at your cervix!"

There were also dwarf maples at the {SAMEOLD PLACE}

[E]
---

EAT FLAMING DEATH: From the Jargon Lexicon of the Hacker's Dictionary:

eat flaming death: imp. A construction popularized among hackers by
   the infamous CPU Wars comic; supposed to derive from a famously
   turgid line in a WWII-era anti-Nazi propaganda comic that ran
   "Eat flaming death, non-Aryan mongrels!" or something of the sort
   (however, it is also reported that the Firesign Theater's
   1975 album "In The Next World, You're On Your Own" included the
   phrase "Eat flaming death, fascist media pigs"; this may have been
   an influence).  Used in humorously overblown expressions of
   hostility. "Eat flaming death, EBCDIC users!"

ELECTRICIAN: "Waiting for the Electrician, or Someone like Him".Another 
FT play, featured on the album of the same name. The first of the cycle 
of plays following the life of {EVERYMAN},named P, in this case.

The Electrician was also a mysterious character that appeared in the 
{HEMLOCK STONES} play "The Giant Rat of Sumatra", and persued the great 
{ZEPELLIN TUBE} that was stolen by Jonas ACME. Little did Jonas
realize that the Electrician was in fact, his own ward and heir, 
young Frank Acne, Jr.!



EVERYMAN: While technically not a commonly-used term in FT discussion, 
EVERYMAN is a useful term to describe the often nameless heroes of the 
FT plays. The FT's {BBOP} book.describes how the hero transmutes from 
one play into the next(summarized here):

"Waiting for the {ELECTRICIAN} or Someone like Him":  The{EVERYMAN} is 
named "P" (after Phil, and in homage to Kafka's K).The play ends with 
"P" escaping from the country Enroute...

...and winding up on Ventura Blvd, in the process of buying a new car. 
{EVERYMAN}'s name is now Babe, and his story is told in "How Can You Be 
in {TWO PLACES} At Once, when you're not Anywhere At All". Babe drifts 
through many adventures, and with the help of {RALPH SPOILSPORT}, falls 
asleep to a hemp-laced version of James Joyce's Molly Bloom soliloquy 
from Ulysses...

...and wakes up at 4AM, now named George Leroy {TIREBITER}! His story 
is now told by the {DWARF} play, as the {EVERYMAN} sees his life played 
out on various channels of the television, where he is, by turns, an 
old movie director, a political candidate,a child star, a high-school 
kid, an adult actor, an Army Officer,and a quiz-show MC. Eventually, he 
"sells out", wakes up from the TV world, regains his youth, and runs 
out to get an ice-cream bar from the truck...

...Hunger satisfied, and with nothing else to do on a beautiful Fall 
morning, George-now transmogrified into a young man named Clem -- is 
amused and intrigued by the arrival of the {FUTURE FAIR}Tour Bus, as 
described in the {BOZO}S play (note that when Barney,the {BOZO}, 
reminds Clem to inflate his shoes, Clem replies that he no longer wears 
shoes -- as Porgie {TIREBITER} in {DWARF} did).As he wanders through 
the Fair, he asks both the {PRESIDENT}and{DOCTOR MEMORY} a question 
about the PORRIDGE BIRD, which brings down the whole show. The fair and 
all its creations vanish, leaving only the fireworks of the departure. 
And now, the story changes,and the Future is Past, (coming full circle 
?) ...


EYKIW: Everything You Know Is Wrong! An FT play satirizing {SEEKERS}.

[F]
---

FALL OVER: A common phrase occurring throughout FT plays is "(s)He's no 
fun, (s)he fell right over". This is tied indirectly to {FUDD'S LAW}: 
If you push something hard enough it will fall over. 

Lots of people fall over in FT plays, presumably in obedience to{FUDD'S 
LAW}. Among them, {BABE} in the {TWO PLACES} play,{NANCY} fell over in 
an episode of {NICK DANGER}, Third-eye,and Edmund's Nuncle fell over in 
the play "Waiting for the Count of Monte Cristo (or someone like Him" 
in the {NOT INSANE} album ("What,what,Dead drunk ... NAY DEAD!").

The Nick Danger reference is particularly dizzying, as the following
transcript shows:

  NANCY: [DIZZY] The whole world is spinning!
  NICK: That's lucky for us! If it were flat, all the Chinese would
        fall off!

  [SOUND OF NANCY FALLING]

  NICK: She's no fun, she fell right over. Wait a minute...didn't I
  say that on the other side of the record. Where am I? I better
  check...

  [PORTION OF OTHER SIDE OF RECORD PLAYED BACKWARDS]

  NICK: Oh, it's OK, they're speaking Chinese..

-- Note: the "Chinese" are on the other side of a *flat* vinyl record,
   which is spinning!

This phrase was quoted recently by the character Dr. Venckman on the 
cartoon version of "The Real Ghostbusters", in the episode titled,
'My Uncle Harold'.

In {BOZO} we hear,  "Animals without backbones hid from each other, 
or fell down."


FIVE LIFESTYLES OF MAN: {BOZO}S, {BOOGIES}, {BEANERS}, {ZIPS} and 
{BERZERKERS}. The FT's {BBOP} book describes them all as follows:

<quote>

The five lifestyles of man in the future are, starting from top to 
bottom, though it's circular:

First the {BERZERKER}. Clue to a Berserker: Anybody who's got a 
gun.Anybody in a lime-green car with eight-foot tires, called Demon or 
Barracuda. Any Army officer, anybody in uniform. A Bobby is not a 
Berserker. But maybe he is because he carries his job, his badge. Most 
people who have jobs. There's a Berserker aspect to all of us. You can 
play softball with a Berserker. A Berserker doesn't always have to 
kill, but in the back of his mind, it's not a bad idea.

Under the Berserkers are the {ZIPS}. The archetypal Zip is the 1930's 
guy with the thin moustache. Zips have always been concerned with hair. 
We're exhibiting Zip tendencies in having rather fancily cut 
moustaches. We're all prone to these various aspects. There's a Zip in 
everyone's kip, is the World War One English expression. Zips love new 
products. Zips are often found inside new headphones. They've got zip, 
pep. Zzzzzip! Zip me up! Most actors are Zips. There's a category 
called Hip Zip, which David invented yesterday.

{BOZO} is the brotherhood of Zips and Others. Bozos are people who band 
together for fun and  profit. They have no jobs. Anybody who goes on a 
tour is a Bozo. Why does a Bozo cross the street? Because there's a 
Bozo on the other side. It comes from the phrase *vos otros*, meaning 
others. They're the huge, fat, middle waist. The archetype is an Irish 
drunk clown with red hair and nose, and pale skin. Fields, William 
Bendix. Everybody tends to drift towards Bozoness. It has Oz in it. 
They mean well. They're straight-looking except they've got inflatable 
shoes. They like their comforts. The Bozos have learned to enjoy their 
free time, which is all the time.

["*vos otros*" is a multilevel pun on the spanish noun, *bosotros*, 
meaning clowns, "the 'b' and the 'v' being the same" -- ed.]

Now, the {BOOGIES}. You see a bunch of Boogies around you. That's our 
lifestyle. There are more spades in this class than any other. But the 
world is changing. There are now getting to be a lot of spade Zips. And 
spade Bozos. Boogies don't differentiate between grass and alcohol. 
People who work in post offices are generally Boogies. They take it 
easy. They don't Zip. They're not Bozos because they don't clone. They 
boogie around rather than hanging around one another. They Boogie.

The other class is the {BEANERS}. The Beaners live outside the Law of 
Gravity. They have more color television sets than anybody in the 
world. They're always appearing either on or with you color TV. They 
watch themselves on color TV. Beaners are very concerned with their own 
refuse, which they leave piled up around their house, but always in 
use. They're always going to use it. Hundreds of old pickup trucks. All 
Indians are Beaners. They don't care. Why should they? Beaners can't 
tell lies. They fear no one. "Don't point your finger at me Daddy-o, I 
cut it off!" Pico and Alvarado are Beaners. We love the Beaners.

Most youth is Bozo-like now [early 70's]. That's why people get so 
upset when Berzerkers come into a Bozo gathering. 'Cause Bozos never do 
anything to anybody. Bozos keep having rock festivals. They create 
marijuana free-areas. Grass has moved into Bozodom.

The Berserkers and Zips run things now. Why does a Zip pay taxes? 
Because he likes to fill out the forms. Berserkers run things by 
telling you the Beaners are going to get you. Those desperate Beaners 
may strike at any time! All politicians are Berserkers.

<unquote>

Update for the 90's:

During the late 70's the youth began drifting into {ZIP}ness, with the 
disco-era, and the general populace, in definite {BERZERKER} mode,began 
the Reagan years....

The use by former {PRESIDENT} George Bush, referring to some other 
politicians as "Bozos" may not have been influenced by the FT, but it 
might as well have been. Bush himself, like most politicians,was a 
{BERZERKER}.

Clinton has been showing definite {BOZO} tendencies in the way that he 
{CLONES}, {BOOGIE}ness with his non-inhaling experiments,{ZIP}ness with 
Cristophe, but to date only a few {BERZERKER} tendencies...

But remember: it's all cyclical!



FLOTSAM JETSAM: The sidekick of {HEMLOCK STONES}.

FOUR OR FIVE CRAZY GUYS: The Firesign Theatre.

FUDD'S LAW: "If You Push Something Hard Enough, It Will Fall Over". A 
Law Enunciated by the FT in the {WALL OF SCIENCE} segment of 
{ITWABOTB}. The full name is "Fudd's First Law of Opposition".

See also {TESLACLE'S DEVIANT}, and {FALL OVER}.

FT: The Firesign Theatre.

FUTURE FAIR(E): From {BOZOS} -- Possibly motivated by the past-looking 
Renaissance Faire, the FUTURE FAIR looked fondly back to the future. 
(The movie title "Back to the Future" may have been influence by this). 
"A fair for all and no fare for anybody!"

FTAEBGB: (Faster,Further) Than Anyone's Ever Been Gone Before!
Lots of people are always breaking the limits in FT plays. 

In {HEMLOCK STONES} Sumatran {RAT} episode, after installing the 
{ZEPPELIN TUBE} into their yacht, Violet Dudley, says, "Whoo! that's 
faster than anyone's ever been gone before!

For example, in {NICK DANGER}, "Cut 'Em Off At the Past" episode, we 
hear:

 CATHERWOOD:  "I'll be gone for thousand years!"
 NANCY:       "Gee, that's longer than anyone's ever been gone before."
 CATHERWOOD:  "But to you it will seem only a moment.  Very well,
              my dear:  Forward Into The Past!"  <fading>
 NANCY:       "I hope he gets back before all this dry ice melts."



[G]
---

GEORGE TIREBITER: See {TIREBITER}.

GORGONZOLA: A fearsome cheese-monster! Mentioned by {BRADSHAW} on a 
{YOUNG GUY} Motor-Detective radio show, and elsewhere. See also 
{CHEESE}.

[H]
---

HEMLOCK STONES: Yet another FT detective, loosely based on Sherlock 
Holmes. Known as "Hemlock Stones, the Great Defective". His sidekick is 
{FLOTSAM JETSAM}.

HIDEO GUMP: A Japanese business man, whose son Hideo Gump, Jr.played 
the role of {YOUNG GUY}, Motor Detective!

HOLOGRAM: A 3D cybernetic {CLONE} of someone, made popular in the play 
{ITWABOTB}.



[I]
---

ITWABOTB: I Think We're All {BOZO}S On This Bus. One of the 
cornerstones of FT philosophy and viewpoints, and the fourth in the 
FT's {EVERYMAN} cycle of plays.

INSANE: See {NOT INSANE}.

[J]
---

[K]
---

[L]
---

LEPRECHAUNS: Posed the {PORRIDGE BIRD} question to {EVERYMAN}. And just 
look at the havok THAT recked!

LOOSTNERS: Caster-oil flakes. One of {NICK DANGER}'s sponsors. "With
real glycerin vibra-fome!"

[M]
---

MARK TIME: A space-adventurer serialized by the FT in their "Dear 
Friends" album, and also a ride in the {FUTURE FAIR}.

MEMORY: See {DOCTOR MEMORY}!

[N]
---

NANCY: Also known as Melanie Haber, Audrey Farber, Susan 
Underhill,and... Betty Jo Bialowsky! {NICK DANGER}'s old college beau, 
in "Cut 'em off at the Past!"

NICK DANGER: A private-eye, made popular in the FT play,"Nick Danger, 
Third Eye", on the {TWO PLACES} album, and in the video episode, "The 
Case 0f the Missing {YOLKS}". His Japanese counterpart is {YOUNG GUY}, 
Motor Detective! He is tied to George {TIREBITER} via {ANCHOVIES},
which George doesn't like on his pizzas.

NOT INSANE: The reason you should have voted for {PAPOON}, rather than 
those other {BERZERKERS} and {BOZO}S. He's not insane! Refers also to 
the FT's album of the same name. Crazy {ROCKY} also said, "I'm not
insane!" in the {YOLKS} video.



[O]
---

OSSMAN: David Ossman, one of the FT members.

OXNARD: A real place on the California coast, home of the {YOLK}s. 
{ROCKY ROCOCO} is thought to be responsible for everything bad that 
happens there. (In the FT video, "The case of the missing {YOLK}s").

OZ: The land of {BOZOS}. Refers to Radio Free Oz, on Pacifica-sponsored 
KPFK radio in Los Angeles, where the FT used to broadcast their show. 
David Ossman is also referred to sometimes as Oz.



[P]
---

PAPOON: An FT character who ran for {PRESIDENT}. He's {NOT INSANE}!

PARK: "Park and Lock it! Not Responsible" A common yell in FT plays. 
{PICO} and {ALVARADO} yell it a lot. According to the {BBOP} book,
when Peter Bergman was young, he and a kid named Bruce Berger
opened up a parking lot one night in an empty lot across from an
Emporium show in the Midwest. As Peter put it, "We made $50 wearing
Cleveland Indians baseball caps, yelling, "*Park and Lock It! Not
Responsible!"

PICO: {ALVARADO}'s friend, as in "It's Pico and Alvarado". Another
street in Los Angeles.

PICKLES: Lots of pickles in FT. {ROCKY ROCOCO} is always carrying
some around in a brown paper bag, and often wears Pickle on a Rope
perfume. "Pickles down the rat-hole!", says {HEMLOCK STONES}.

PLAYER: Another {EVERYMAN}, in the record "Eat or Be Eaten", who, like 
{BABE}, has his adventures in a car.

POOP: A character in many FT plays, who gives speeches with numerous 
spoonerisms and Freudian slips, eg. "In the words of the Foundry, er.. 
Founder, Ukaipa Heep,". Appears as Principal Poop in {DWARF}.

PORRIDGE BIRD: A (mythical?) bird which lays its eggs in the air. Why? 
See {WDTPBLIEINA}.

PRESIDENT: A popular ride in the {FUTURE FAIR}. You get to ask a 
question of the computer-operated President, and get a free simulfax 
copy of your question, together with his answer. {CLEM} broke the 
President by asking him about {PORRIDGE BIRD}s.

  ...{PAPOON} also ran for President!

PROCTOR: Philip Proctor, one of the FT members.

[Q]
---

[R]
---

RALPH SPOILSPORT: A used-car salesman, based on Ralph William's ads in 
Los Angeles. Also refers to a kind of mantra, which when recited sounds 
like a used-car ad: "Hiya friend, Ralph Spoilsport, Ralph Spoilsport 
motors, the largest new-used and used-new dealership..."

RATS: Rats are featured prominently in FT plays, notably, in {HEMLOCK 
STONES} "Tale of the Giant Rat of Sumatra", in the song "Rat in a Box" 
(in the {NICK DANGER} video, {YOLKS}), and in their play "The Year of 
the Rat".

REGNAD KCIN: See {NICK DANGER}, the other way around. See also
{ANCHOVIES}.

RESPONSIBLE: See {PARK}.

ROACH: See {DWARF}.

ROCKY ROCOCO: {NICK DANGER'S} nemesis. Rococo is an extended impression 
of Peter Lorre playing Joel Cairo in the film "The Maltese Falcon. His 
name is an apparent play on the Beatle's "Rocky Racoon".

Rocky Rococo is known to be a {DWARF}, wear terrible perfumes, like 
"pyramid patchuli", and "pickle on a rope". He is also thought to be 
responsible for everything bad that happens in {OXNARD}. His main 
offensive tactic appears to be to put people on installment plans, and 
then pressure them when they can't keep up the payments.

His Japanese counterpart may be Rocky Rocomoto, whose TV series,
"Million-Dollar Monster Crasic" (on the {NOT INSANE}  album), featured
the Shake-a-speare play "Anythinge you want to", in addition to
{YOUNG GUY}, Motor Detective.

[S]
---
SAME OLD PLACE: The Old Same Place, in Santa Barbara, where {NANCY} and 
Catherwood, her butler/husband lived.
See also {NICK DANGER}.

SEPULVEEDA: A mis-pronounced street in Los Angeles in {NICK DANGER}.
The actual street is Sepulveda. See also {PICO}, {ALVARADO},
{TAJUNGA}.

SEEKER: There's a seeker born every minute!

SFX: A standard radio term for "Sound Effects" man. {ROCKY ROCOCO}
had to split his "half-a-key" with the SFX man. The tools used in
SFX are often mixed up in FT plays with the real things they're
supposed to imitate: see, eg, {CELLOPHANE}, {CORNSTARCH}.

There are often SFX-reference jokes in FT, For example:

  NICK: [MUFFLED VOICE] Rocky Rococo, that sleazy weazle, how did
  he get in here? And... How do I make my voice do this?

or:

  NANCY: [SLAPPING NOISE] Oh Nicky, Nick, Nick, Nick! Are you all
        right?
  NICK: [Coming To] Uhhh..Yes.
  NANCY: Then stop slapping me!


SHOES: Shoes are ubiquitous in FT plays. "Shoes for industry!" "Don't 
take off your shoes!" (Porgie {TIREBITER} did), or if you're a {BOZO} 
you can inflate them.

SUGAR: A popular phrase in FT is "More Sugar!". We hear a voice yelling
"More Sugar!" during Pastor Flashes' Hour of Reckoning, in the {DWARF}
play, and mention is made of the "More Sugar Foundation" in the
"Not Insane" album.

[T]
---

TAJUNGA: Yet another mis-pronounced LA street name in {NICK DANGER}.
Tujunga canyon is a bit north of Pasadena.

TESLACLE'S DEVIANT: "Who goes in, must come out". This is a corollary 
to {FUDD'S LAW}, and is referred to in the {BOZO} play,and also in 
{HEMLOCK STONES}, Giant {RAT} of Sumatra play, where Stones chases the 
{ELECTRICIAN} into the bathroom, and continues to search, claiming, 
"what goes in must come out! Fudd's Law!"

TIREBITER: The last name of George Leroy Tirebiter, anonther 
incarnation of P, the {EVERYMAN} in the FT's play {DWARF}. Also the 
name of the {YOLK}'S neighbors in the {NICK DANGER} video. The original
George Tirebiter was believed to be a dog, the mascot of a university
somewhere (I used to have a newsclip of the dog). George also went by 
the name Porgie, in the FT teen-movies, Porgie and Mudhead, a verbal 
play on "Archie and Jughead".

TORTURING: "Not to be Torturing Me!" Said by HIDEO {GUMP}, Jr., who 
played {YOUNG GUY}, Motor Detective. He was being tortured because 
"decision-making factor absent from brain", following a terrible brain-
washing session in radio prison, at the hands of {BRADSHAW} !

TWO PLACES: "How Can You Be in Two Places At Once, when you're not 
Anywhere At All?" The record album containg the {EVERYMAN} story of 
{BABE}, and also the {NICK DANGER} episode, "Cut Em Off at the Past!"

[U]
---

UNDERHILL: Susan Underhill -- Another of {NANCY}'s last names.

[V]
---

VIOLET DUDLEY: An American ingenue in {HEMLOCK STONES}.

[W]
---

WALL OF SCIENCE: Another ride in the {FUTURE FAIR}, describing the 
evolution of the universe. "Man, woman, child, ALL are up against the 
WALL OF SCIENCE".

Joes Hanes writes:

..an incisive parody of the 60's high school science films.  The 
recounting of the history of life makes many allusions to real 
paleontology, e.g,

 "... sand dollar, which shrank to almost nothing at the bottom of the 
pool" refers to the fossil ancestors of all present day sand dollars, 
which apparently escaped a mass extinction by virtue of their extremely 
small size.

 " ... in the late Devouring period, fish became obnoxious" In the real 
late Devonian, fish became ubiquitous.


WDTPBLHEINA: Why Does The Porridge Bird Lay His Eggs In The Air? This 
question was asked by the character P in {ITWABOTB}, first directly to 
the {PRESIDENT}, who broke, and then to {DOCTOR MEMORY},who became 
confused, and shut down the whole {FUTURE FAIR}. Dr. Memory kept 
getting the question wrong, for example: 

"White dust 'n' perished birds leaves its hex in the air?" Nooo.
"Wise doves 'n' parish bards lazy leg in the Eire?" Nooo.
"Wise-ass the poor-rich Barney laser's edge in the fair?"

This question was posed to {EVERYMAN} by the Leprechauns, although {BOB 
BUNNY} reported that he found it written on the Great Wall of Mars.
{BOB BUNNY} asked this question of {HIDEO GUMP}, Jr, during a segment 
of {YOUNG GUY}, Motor Detective. Young Guy promised to answer the 
question tomorrow!

Reports also indicate that in the record "Eat or Be Eaten", Laura asks 
{PLAYER} the question at the end of the record, to which Player 
replies, "Aw, that's the old Leprechaun scam... that's EASY!"

An FT fan writes:

This is definitely a classical reference, which I've been racking my 
brains for, but can't remember.  It seems to me that some Greek or 
Roman historian (Herodotus?) describes a bird which does indeed lay its 
eggs in the air, with the obvious unfortunate result...

[X]
---

[Y]
---

YOLK: The poorest people in the country, depicted in {NICK DANGER} and 
the Case of the Missing Yolks.

YOUNG GUY: Another FT private detective. "Young Guy, Motor Detective", 
played by {HIDEO GUMP}, Jr.

[Z]
---

ZEPELLIN TUBE: A source of immense power, possessed by the Sumatran 
{RAT}s in an adventure of {HEMLOCK STONES}.

ZENO'S PARADOX: A paradox devised by the Greek philosopher Zeno,
which seems to prove that motion as such is impossible; Reason:
Consider an arrow flying towards a target. Before it gets to the
target it must first get halfway there, but before it gets to that
point it must first get 1/4 the way there, but before that (etc..)
Since an infinite number of things must be done first, the arrow
could never get *anywhere*; ergo, motion is impossible.

This paradox is referred to indirectly in the {TWO PLACES} album,
where {BABE} falls asleep in his car, while the talking freeway
signs read off:

      "Antelope Freeway, one mile"
      "Antelope Freeway, one half mile"
      "Antelope Freeway, one quarter mile"
      "Antelope Freeway, one eighth mile"
      "Antelope Freeway, one sixteenth mile"
      "Antelope Freeway, one thirtysecondth mile"
      "Antelope Freeway, one sixty-fourth mile"
      "Antelope Freeway, one one-hundred-and-twenty-eighth mile"
      ...

ZIPS: As in "I'm hip like a zip, let's take a trip". One of the {FIVE 
LIFESTYLES OF MAN} according to the FT.

------------------- End of Side 4 of 4 --------------------------------
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