


     Tools & Me

                                             By Gary Bryant





          I've got lots of tools.  Small tools and big tools.  
     Cheap tools and even a few expensive tools.  Admittedly 
     the cheap tools outnumber the expensive tools by eight 
     to one.  
      
          I like scrounging for tools at garage sales. They can 
     usually be found displayed in a respectable location on an 
     old folding table.  And unlike the other household merchandise 
     placed  haphazardly around the driveway, the tool table is in  
     the garage, in the shade, out of the sun.  Reluctantly, the 
     garage door has been left open.

          It's true, a lot of women today use tools.  I'm glad.  
     That means less  tool using for me.  But it hasn't always 
     been this way.

          Tools used to belong to men. Men have collected a lot  
     of old sayings about tools.  You might hear these old  gems 
     at garage sales as you ponder the purchase of a  pair of 
     pliers. 
       
          "You never know when you need a  good pair of pliers!" 
     The  man  says.

          "Mmmmm," you  reply.    
          
           "Tools can come in handy you know!" The man  adds 
     with a flourish.

          "Uh huh." you say.   
          
          "You need a  good tool to do a good job!" 
    
          "Right!" I agreed. 

          "You can judge a man by the quality of his tools!" he  adds.

          "Fifty cents!" I respond.

          "Deal!" He smiles. Pocketing the change, he hands you  
     the pair  of  pliers. "If you need curtains, see my wife  
     at the  picnic table, she's got curtains." 


