Shit Types: Ghost Shit: The kind where you feel the shit come out, but there is no shit in the bowl.
Shit Types: CLEAN SHIT: The kind where you shit it out, see it in the bowl, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
Shit Types: WET SHIT: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't stain them.
Shit Types: SECOND WAVE SHIT: This happens when you're done shitting and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and then you realize that you have to shit some more.
Shit Types: POP-A-VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD SHIT: The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.
Shit Types: LINCOLN LOG SHIT: This kind of shit is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.
Shit Types: GASSEY SHIT: It's so noisy, everyone within earshot is giggling.
Shit Types: DRINKER SHIT: The kind of shit you have in the morning after a good night of drinking.  Its most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.
Shit Types: GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-SHIT SHIT: The kind where you want to shit and all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.
Shit Types: SPINAL TAP SHIT: That's when it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.
Shit Types: THE SURPRISE SHIT: You're not even at the toilet because you are thinking you're about to fart, but OOPS!
Shit Types: CORN SHIT: (self-explanatory)
Shit Types: LIQUID SHIT: The kind where yellow-brown liquid shoots out and splashes all over the toilet bowl.
Shit Types: WET CHEEKS SHIT (THE POWER DUMP): The kind that comes out so fast, your butt gets splashed with water.
Shit Types: THE DANGLING SHIT: This shit refuses to drop into the toilet although you know you are done shitting it.  You just pray that a shake or two will cut it loose.
Quotes: "I want to make sure everybody who has a job wants a job." --George Bush, during his first Presidential campaign
Quotes: "This is a great day for France!" --Richard Nixon, while attending Charles De Gaulle's (former president of france) funeral
Quotes: "Now, like, I'm President. It would be pretty hard for some drug guy to come into the White House and start offering it up, you know? ... I bet if they did, I hope I would say, 'Hey, get lost. We don't want any of that.'" --George Bush, talking about drug abuse to a group of students
Quotes: "For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex ... uh... setbacks. --George Bush
Quotes: "I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy. But that could change." --Dan Quayle
Quotes: "Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here." --Dan Quayle during a visit to Hawaii in 1989
Quotes: "What a waste it is to lose one's mind--or not to have a mind. How true that is." --Dan Quayle addressing the United Negro College Fund
Quotes: "I am honored today to begin my first term as the Governor of Baltimore -- that is, Maryland." --William Donald Schaefer, first inaugural address
Quotes: "The caribou love it. They rub against it and they have babies. There are more caribou in Alaska than you can shake a stick at." --George Bush, on the Alaska pipeline
Quotes: "I hope I stand for anti-bigotry, anti-Semitism, anti-racism. This is what drives me." --George Bush
Quotes: "If I listened to Michael Dukakis long enough I would be convinced that we're in an economic downturn and people are homeless and going without food and medical attention and that we've got to do something about the unemployed." --Ronald Reagan
Quotes: "My fellow Americans, I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes." --Ronald Reagan, about to go on the air for a radio broadcast, unaware that the microphone was already on
Quotes: "Mars is essentially in the same orbit. Mars is somewhat the same distance from the sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe." --Dan Quayle
Quotes: "Now we are trying to get unemployment to go up and I think we're going to succeed." --Ronald Reagan
Quotes: (Debate) Walter Mondale: George Bush doesn't have the manhood to apologize. Bush: Well, on the manhood thing, I'll put mine up against his any time.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: It can be up or down.  It's more fun when it's up, but it makes it hard to get any real work done.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: In the long-distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information considered vital to the survival of the species.  Some people still think that's the only thing it should be used for, but most folks today use it for fun most of the time.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: It has no conscience and no memory.  Left to its own devices, it will just do the same damn dumb things it did before.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: It provides a way to interact with other people.  Some people take this interaction very seriously, others treat it as a lark.  Sometimes it's hard to tell what kind of person you're dealing with until it's too late.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: If you don't apply the appropriate protective measures, it can spread viruses.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: It has no brain of its own.  Instead, it uses yours.  If you use it too much, you'll find it becomes more and more difficult to think coherently.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual size and influence warrant.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: If you're not careful what you do with it, it can get you in big trouble.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: It has its own agenda.  Somehow, no matter how good your intentions, it will warp your behavior.  Later you may ask yourself "why on earth did I do that?"
Why the Internet is like a penis...: Some folks have it, some don't.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: Those who have it would be devastated if it were ever cut off.  They think that those who don't have it are somehow inferior.  They think it gives them power.  They are wrong.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: Those who don't have it may agree that it's a nifty toy, but think it's not worth the fuss that those who do have it make about it.  Still, many of those who don't have it would like to try it.
Why the Internet is like a penis...: Once you've started playing with it, it's hard to stop.  Some people would just play with it all day if they didn't have work to do.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: At dinner, guard your plate with fork and steak knife, so as to give the impression that you'll stab anyone, including the waiter, who reaches for it.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Collect the salt shakers from all of the tables in the restaurant, and balance them in a tower on your table.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Wipe your nose on your date's sleeve. Twice.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Make funny faces at other patrons, then sneer at their reactions.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Repeat every third third word you say say.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Give your claim to fame as being voted "Most Festerous" for your high school yearbook.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Read a newspaper or book during the meal. Ignore your date.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Stare at your date's neck, and grind your teeth audibly.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Twitch spastically. If asked about it, pretend you don't know what they are talking about.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Stand up every five minutes, circle your table with your arms outstretched, and make airplane sounds.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Order a bucket of lard.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Ask for crayons to color the placemat. This works very well in fancier venues that use linen tablecloths.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Howl and whistle at womens' legs, especially if you are female.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Recite your dating history. Improvise. Include pets.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Pull out a harmonica and play blues songs when your date begins talking about themselves.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Sacrifice french fries to the great deity, Pomme.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: When ordering, inquire whether the restaurant has any live food.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Without asking, eat off your date's plate. Eat more from their plate than they do.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Drool.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Chew with your mouth open, talk with your mouth full and spray crumbs.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Eat everything on your plate within 30 seconds of it being placed in front of you.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Excuse yourself to use the restroom. Go back to the head waiter/hostess and ask for another table in a different part of the restaurant. Order another meal. When your date finally finds you, ask him/her "What in the hell took you so long in the restroom?!?"
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Recite graphic limericks to the people at the table next to you.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Ask the people at the neighboring table for food from their plates.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Beg your date to tattoo your name on their derriere. Keep bringing the subject up.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Ask your date how much money they have with them. 
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Order for your date. Order something nasty.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Communicate in mime the entire evening.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Upon entering the restaurant, ask for a seat away from the windows, where you have a you have a good view of all exits, and where you can keep your back to the wall. Act nervous.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Lick your plate. Offer to lick theirs.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Hum. Loudly. In monotone.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Fill your pockets with sugar packets, as well as salt and pepper shakers, silverware, floral arrangements... i.e anything on the table that isn't bolted down.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Hold a debate. Take both sides.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Undress your date verbally. Use a bullhorn.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Auction your date off for silverware.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Slide under the table. Take your plate with you.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Order a baked potato for a side dish. When the waiter brings your food, hide the potato, wait a few minutes, and ask the waiter for the potato you "never got". When the waiter returns with another potato for you, have the first one back up on the plate. Repeat later in the meal.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Order beef tongue. Make lewd comparisons or comments.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Get your date drunk. Talk about their philosophy. Get it on tape, and use good judgement in editing to twist their words around.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Discuss boils and lesions, as if from personal experience.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Speak in pig latin throughout the meal (Or ubber-dubber language, or just nonsense).
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Take a break, and go into the restroom. When you return to the table, throw a spare pair of underwear on the back of one of the chairs. Insist that they just need airing out. 
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: If they are paying, order the most expensive thing on the menu. Take one bite.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Bring 20 or so candles with you, and during the meal get up and arrange them around the table in a circle. Chant.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Save the bones from your meal, and explain that you're taking them home to your invalid, senile old mother, because it's a lot cheaper than actually feeding her.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Order your food by colors and textures. Sculpt.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Take a thermos along, and hide it under the table. Order coffee, and fill the thermos one cup at a time, taking advantage of the free refills.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Insist that the waiter cuts your food into little pieces. In a simliar vein, insist that he take a bite of everything on the plate, to make sure no one poisoned it.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Accuse your date of espionage.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Make odd allusions to dangerous religious cults.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Don't use any verbs during the entire meal.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Pass the hat in the restaurant. Use the proceeds (if any) to pay the bill.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Break wind loudly. Add color commentary. Bow.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Feed imaginary friends, or toy dolls you've brought along.
Ways to get rid of blind dates...: Bring a bucket along. Explain that you frequently get ill.
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Tell the widow that the deceased's last wish was that she make love with you. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Tell the undertaker that he can't close the coffin until you find your contact lens. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Punch the body and tell people that he hit you first. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Tell the widow that you're the deceasd's gay lover. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Ask someone to take a snapshot of you shaking hands with the deceased. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : At the cemetery, play taps on a kazoo. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Walk around telling people that you've seen the will and they're not in it.
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Ask the widow to give you a kiss. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Drive behind the widow's limo and keep honking your horn. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Tell the undertaker that your dog just died and ask if he can sneak him into the coffin. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Put a hard-boiled egg in the mouth of the deceased. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Slip a whoopee cushion under the widow. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Leave some phony dog poop on top of the deceased. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Tell the widow that you have to leave early and ask if the will can be read    before the funeral is over. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Urge the widow to give the deceased's wooden leg to someone poor who can't afford firewood. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Walk around telling people that the deceased didn't like them. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Use the deceased's tongue to lick a stamp. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Ask the widow for money which the deceased owes you. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Take up a collection to pay off the deceased' gambling debts. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Ask the widow if you can have the body to practice tattooing on. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Put Krazy Glue on the deceased's lips just before the widow's last kiss. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Show up at the funeral services in a clown suit. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : If the widow cries, blow a trumpet every time she wipes her nose. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : When no-one's looking, slip plastic vampire-teeth into the deceased's mouth.
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Toss a handful of cooked rice on the deceased and scream "MAGGOTS! MAGGOTS!" and pretend to faint. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : At the cemetary take bets on how long it takes a body to decompose. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Goose the widow as she bends over to throw dirt on the coffin. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Circulate a petition to have the body stuffed instead of buried. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Tell everyone you're from the IRS and you're confiscating the coffin for back-taxes. 
Ways to be offensive at a  funeral : Promise the minister a hundred dollars if he doesn't keep a straight face while praising the deceased.
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Wax the ceiling 
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Contemplate a cockroach
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Get a dog to chase your car... Let him catch it
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Investigate the Czar
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Form a political party
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Climb a sidewalk
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Have a political party
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Get diagonal...with a good friend
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Ride a loaf of bread
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Sharpen a carrot
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Interrogate a gerbil
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Annoy yourself
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Get mad at yourself
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Stop speaking to yourself
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Be a side effect
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Ride a bicycle...up Mt. McKinley
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Duck
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Redecorate...your garage
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Develop a complex
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Join the Army...be someone simple
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Try harder
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Hit the deck
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Put legwarmers on your furniture
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Cut the deck
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: See how long you can stare at a flourescent light...try green
Things to do when your bored, drunk or stoned...: Bronze your sister's turtle... See how long it takes for her to noticeSee what she does when she notices... Bronze your sister
Random Joke: What's the similarity between getting a blowjob from an 80 year old woman, and walking a tight rope? ------ In both cases, you don't really wanna look down.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who goes to man's apartment for snack, gets titbit. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who lay woman on ground, get peace on earth. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding the bag. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who kisses girl's behind, gets crack in face. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Passionate kiss like spider web--lead to undoing of fly. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man with holes in pocket, feels cocky all day. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Virginity like balloon--one prick, all gone. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Girls who rides bicycle, peddles ass all over town. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who farts in church, sits in own pew. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Baseball all wrong--man with four balls can't walk. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who live in glass house, dress in basement. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man with penis in peanut butter is fucking nuts. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who drop watch in toilet, bound to have shitty time. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who take lady on camping trip, have one intent. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who go to bed with sex on mind wake up with solution in hand 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who goes to mans apartment for snack, gets titbit. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who lay woman on ground, get peace on earth. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding the bag. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who go to bed with sex on mind, wake up with solution in hand 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who take lady on camping trip, have one intent. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Virginity like balloon, one prick, all gone. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Passionate kiss like spider web, lead to undoing of fly. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who fart in church, sit in own pew. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Baseball very funny game--man with 4 balls no can walk!! 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who fly plane upside down have crackup. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Secretary not permanent, till screwed on desk. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have! 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who argue with wife all day get no peace at night.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who run behind car get exhausted. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission grow up to be shiftless bastard. 11,1Confuscious Say...: Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man with athletic finger make broad jump. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss balloons. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who lose key to apartment not get new key. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Wash your face in the morning, neck at night. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet many moons. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Elevator smell different to midget. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who lay woman on ground have piece on earth 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Virgin like balloon . . . one prick, all gone.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Baseball wrong . . . man with four balls cannot walk!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Work to become, not to acquire.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Baby conceived in automatic car shiftless bastard.
11,1Confuscious Say...: A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Find old man in dark, not hard!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who smoke pot choke on handle.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Ok for shit to happen . . . will decompose.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who put head on Rail Road track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Sailor who gets discharged from navy leave buddies behind.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Secretary becomes permanent fixture when screwed on desk.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Don't drink and park, accidents cause people.
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double crosser.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who tell one to many light bulb jokes soon burn out!
11,1Confuscious Say...: It takes many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Never raise hands to angry child, it leave groin exposed.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who cooks carrots and peas in same pot is unsanitary.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who fart in church sit in his own pew!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who eat many prunes, sit on toilet many moons.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Confucius say too God damn much!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Those who quote me are fools.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who drive like hell bound to get there!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who keep feet firmly on ground have trouble putting on pants!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who stand on toilet is high on pot!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who sit on tack get point!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who runs behind car gets exhausted!
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who jump off cliff jump to conclusion!
11,1Confuscious Say...: War not determine who's right, war determines who's left.
11,1Confuscious Say...: Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission grow up to be a shiftless bastard. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who lay girl on hill not on level. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Wife who put man in dog house find him in cat house. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who farts in church sits alone in pew. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who cooks carrots and peas in same pot very unsanitary. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to feel low down. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man with athletic finger make broad jump. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Seven days on honeymoon make one hole weak. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Modern house without toilet uncanny. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who springs on inner-spring this spring, gets off-spring next spring 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Nail on board is not good as screw on bench. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Short man who dance with tall woman get bust in mouth. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who lay woman on ground has peace on earth. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who sleep on railroad tracks wake up with split personality. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Baseball very strange game. How can man with 4 balls walk? 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who go to man's apartment for snack may get tit bit. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who kisses girl's behind, gets crack in face. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who spends much time on bedspring, may have offspring. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Passionate kiss like spider web: lead to undoing of fly. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man and mouse alike, both end up in pussy. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who get kicked in testicles left holding bag. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who sucks nipples make clean breast of things. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who fights with wife all day, gets no peace at night. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who snatches kisses when young, kisses snatches when old. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Wife who slides down bannister makes monkey shine. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Virginity like balloon, one prick and it is all gone. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Girl who douches with vinegar walk around with sour puss. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Woman who flies upside-down have crack up. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who sneezes without a handkerchief takes matters into his own hands. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who have head up ass, have shitty outlook on life. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who have hand in pocket not just jingling change. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: A streaker is someone who is unsuited for his work. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who make oral love to epileptic woman may get tongue-tied. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: He who make love to exhaust pipe of car have hot rod. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Eplileptic woman who give blow-job may bite big one. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Sleepy man who stand behind car get exhausted. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Sleepy man who stand in front of car get tired. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who go to bed with itchy ass, wakes up with smelly fingaz. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who stand on toilet, must be high on pot. 
11,1Confuscious Say...: Man who have hand in pockets, not crazy, just feeling nuts.