You fiddle with the station selector for a while:

"Crazy Erek's Used Weapons Sales. More blast for your buck!"

"The New Plasma Rifle model IRX#3. Convert your adversaries
 to their base elements! Now available at Crazy Erek's Used
 Weapons Sales."

"Magik Missile. Blast your enemies before they blast you!
 avail and Melfred's Magik. and other fine stores."

"Melfred's Magik. Buy the best spells at the best prices.
 Located in Llenerva"

"Today in the news. The information dep. of Magi Inc. has recently
 discovered a new plane. The elemental plane of NERF they say,
 proves that there are in deed five elements. Earth, Air, fire,
 water, and now NERF..."

"Sureshot Weapons, from Lugers to AK-47s if it goes BANG its
 a Sureshot. Located in Riverdell."

"Be all that you can be in the Church of the Mushroom Cloud."
                paid for by the Cult of the Cloud

"The savior wore blue suede shoes! Join the Church of Elvis!"

"A God is still alive and well today. Find him at the shrine!"
                paid for by the Cult of TeCC

"Come visit beautiful Goblin Town... We'll be really neighborly!"

"Amiture Jewelers. Custom Jewelry. Necklaces of Wizardry now 0.00001% off!
 Ask about our special on necklaces of strangulation."

"CauseWay weapons guild. Enchanted weapons for less!"

"7 Dwarves Carpentry. Hostel sales our specialty. <Ask about our
 monsters.... Whole sale!>"

"People's of earth. This is Voltar of the planet Dweb, and you
are now my slaves... what... ya... oh sorry peoples of Earth
this is the wrong game."
