******************

= C =
=====

C: n. 1. The third letter of the English alphabet.  2. ASCII
   1000011.  3. The name of a programming language designed by
   Dennis Ritchie during the early 1970s and immediately used to
   reimplement {{UNIX}}.  So called because many features derived
   from an earlier compiler named `B' in commemoration of
   *its* parent, BCPL; before Bjarne Stroustrup settled the
   question by designing C++, there was a humorous debate over whether
   C's successor should be named `D' or `P'.  C became immensely
   popular outside Bell Labs after about 1980 and is now the dominant
   language in systems and microcomputer applications programming.
   See also {languages of choice}, {indent style}.

   C is often described, with a mixture of fondness and disdain
   varying according to the speaker, as "a language that combines
   all the elegance and power of assembly language with all the
   readability and maintainability of assembly language".

calculator: [Cambridge] n. Syn. for {bitty box}.

can: vt. To abort a job on a time-sharing system.  Used esp. when the
   person doing the deed is an operator, as in "canned from the
   {{console}}".  Frequently used in an imperative sense, as in "Can
   that print job, the LPT just popped a sprocket!"  Synonymous with
   {gun}.  It is said that the ASCII character with mnemonic CAN
   (0011000) was used as a kill-job character on some early OSes.

canonical: [historically, `according to religious law'] adj. The
   usual or standard state or manner of something.  This word has a
   somewhat more technical meaning in mathematics.  Two formulas such
   as 9 + x and x + 9 are said to be equivalent because
   they mean the same thing, but the second one is in `canonical
   form' because it is written in the usual way, with the highest
   power of x first.  Usually there are fixed rules you can use
   to decide whether something is in canonical form.  The jargon
   meaning, a relaxation of the technical meaning, acquired its
   present loading in computer-science culture largely through its
   prominence in Alonzo Church's work in computation theory and
   mathematical logic (see {Knights of the Lambda Calculus}).
   Compare {vanilla}.

   This word has an interesting history.  Non-technical academics do
   not use the adjective `canonical' in any of the senses defined
   above with any regularity; they do however use the nouns `canon' and
   `canonicity' (not *canonicalness or *canonicality). The `canon' of
   a given author is the complete body of authentic works by that
   author (this usage is familiar to Sherlock Holmes fans as well as
   to literary scholars).  `*The* canon' is the body of works in
   a given field (e.g., works of literature, or of art, or of music)
   deemed worthwhile for students to study and for scholars to
   investigate.

   These non-techspeak academic usages derive ultimately from the
   historical meaning, specifically the classification of the books of
   the Bible into two groups by Christian theologians.  The
   `canonical' books were the ones widely accepted as Holy
   Scripture and held to be of primary authority.  The
   `deuterocanonical' books (literally `secondarily canonical';
   also known as the `Apochrypha') were held to be of lesser
   authority --- indeed they have been held in such low esteem that to
   this day they are omitted from most Protestant bibles.

   Hackers invest this term with a playfulness that makes an ironic
   contrast with its historical meaning.  A true story: One Bob
   Sjoberg, new at the MIT AI Lab, expressed some annoyance at the use
   of jargon.  Over his loud objections, GLS and RMS made a point of
   using it as much as possible in his presence, and eventually it
   began to sink in.  Finally, in one conversation, he used the word
   `canonical' in jargon-like fashion without thinking.  Steele:
   "Aha!  We've finally got you talking jargon too!"  Stallman:
   "What did he say?"  Steele: "Bob just used `canonical' in the
   canonical way."

   Of course, canonicality depends on context, but it is implicitly
   defined as the way *hackers* normally expect things to be.
   Thus, a hacker may claim with a straight face that `according to
   religious law' is *not* the canonical meaning of `canonical'.

card: n. 1. An electronic printed-circuit board (see also {tall
   card}, {short card}.  2. obs. Syn. {{punched card}}.

card walloper: n. An EDP programmer who grinds out batch programs
   that do stupid things like print people's paychecks.  Compare
   {code grinder}.  See also {{punched card}}, {eighty-column
   mind}.

careware: /keir'weir/ n. {Shareware} for which either the
   author suggests that some payment be made to a nominated charity
   or a levy directed to charity is included on top of the
   distribution charge.  Syn. {charityware}; compare
   {crippleware}, sense 2.

cargo cult programming: n. A style of (incompetent) programming
   dominated by ritual inclusion of code or program structures that
   serve no real purpose.  A cargo cult programmer will usually
   explain the extra code as a way of working around some bug
   encountered in the past, but usually neither the bug nor the reason
   the code apparently avoided the bug was ever fully understood
   (compare {shotgun debugging}, {voodoo programming}).

   The term `cargo cult' is a reference to aboriginal religions that
   grew up in the South Pacific after World War II.  The practices of
   these cults center on building elaborate mockups of airplanes and
   military style landing strips in the hope of bringing the return of
   the god-like airplanes that brought such marvelous cargo during the
   war.  Hackish usage probably derives from Richard Feynman's
   characterization of certain practices as "cargo cult science" in
   his book `Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman' (W. W. Norton
   & Co, New York 1985, ISBN 0-393-01921-7).

case and paste: [from `cut and paste'] n. 1. The addition of a new
   {feature} to an existing system by selecting the code from an
   existing feature and pasting it in with minor changes.  Common in
   telephony circles because most operations in a telephone switch are
   selected using `case' statements.  Leads to {software bloat}.

   In some circles of EMACS users this is called `programming by
   Meta-W', because Meta-W is the EMACS command for copying a block of
   text to a kill buffer in preparation to pasting it in elsewhere.
   The term is condescending, implying that the programmer is acting
   mindlessly rather than thinking carefully about what is required to
   integrate the code for two similar cases.

casters-up mode: [IBM] n. Yet another synonym for `broken' or
   `down'.

casting the runes: n. What a {guru} does when you ask him or her
   to run a particular program and type at it because it never works
   for anyone else; esp. used when nobody can ever see what the guru
   is doing different from what J. Random Luser does.  Compare
   {incantation}, {runes}, {examining the entrails}; also see
   the AI koan about Tom Knight in appendix A.

cat: [from `catenate' via {{UNIX}} `cat(1)'] vt.
   1. [techspeak] To spew an entire file to the screen or some other
   output sink without pause.  2. By extension, to dump large amounts
   of data at an unprepared target or with no intention of browsing it
   carefully.  Usage: considered silly.  Rare outside UNIX sites.  See
   also {dd}, {BLT}.

   Among UNIX fans, `cat(1)' is considered an excellent example
   of user-interface design, because it outputs the file contents
   without such verbosity as spacing or headers between the files, and
   because it does not require the files to consist of lines of text,
   but works with any sort of data.

   Among UNIX-haters, `cat(1)' is considered the {canonical}
   example of *bad* user-interface design.  This because it is more
   often used to {blast} a file to standard output than to
   concatenate two files.  The name `cat' for the former
   operation is just as unintuitive as, say, LISP's {cdr}.

   Of such oppositions are {holy wars} made....

catatonic: adj. Describes a condition of suspended animation in
   which something is so {wedged} or {hung} that it makes no
   response.  If you are typing on a terminal and suddenly the
   computer doesn't even echo the letters back to the screen as you
   type, let alone do what you're asking it to do, then the computer
   is suffering from catatonia (possibly because it has crashed).
   "There I was in the middle of a winning game of {nethack} and it
   went catatonic on me!  Aaargh!" Compare {buzz}.

cdr: /ku'dr/ or /kuh'dr/ [from LISP] vt. To skip past the
   first item from a list of things (generalized from the LISP
   operation on binary tree structures, which returns a list
   consisting of all but the first element of its argument).  In the
   form `cdr down', to trace down a list of elements:  "Shall we
   cdr down the agenda?"  Usage: silly.  See also {loop through}.

   Historical note: The instruction format of the IBM 7090 that hosted
   the original LISP implementation featured two 15-bit fields called
   the `address' and `decrement' parts.  The term `cdr' was originally
   `Contents of Decrement part of Register'.  Similarly, `car' stood
   for `Contents of Address part of Register'.

   The cdr and car operations have since become bases for
   formation of compound metaphors in non-LISP contexts.  GLS recalls,
   for example, a programming project in which strings were
   represented as linked lists; the get-character and skip-character
   operations were of course called CHAR and CHDR.

chad: /chad/ n. 1. The perforated edge strips on printer paper, after
   they have been separated from the printed portion.  Also called
   {selvage} and {perf}.  2. obs. The confetti-like paper bits punched
   out of cards or paper tape; this was also called `chaff', `computer
   confetti', and `keypunch droppings'.

   Historical note: One correspondent believes `chad' (sense 2)
   derives from the Chadless keypunch (named for its inventor), which
   cut little u-shaped tabs in the card to make a hole when the tab
   folded back, rather than punching out a circle/rectangle; it was
   clear that if the Chadless keypunch didn't make them, then the
   stuff that other keypunches made had to be `chad'.

chad box: n. {Iron Age} card punches contained boxes inside them,
   about the size of a lunchbox (or in some models a large
   wastebasket), that held the {chad} (sense 2).  You had to open
   the covers of the card punch periodically and empty the chad box.
   The {bit bucket} was notionally the equivalent device in the CPU
   enclosure, which was typically across the room in another great
   gray-and-blue box.

chain: [orig. from BASIC's `CHAIN' statement] vi. To hand off
   execution to a child or successor without going through the
   {OS} command interpreter that invoked it.  The state of the
   parent program is lost and there is no returning to it.  Though
   this facility used to be common on memory-limited micros and is
   still widely supported for backward compatibility, the jargon usage
   is semi-obsolescent; in particular, most UNIX programmers will
   think of this as an {exec}.  Oppose the more modern {subshell}.

char: /keir/ or /char/; rarely, /kar/ n. Shorthand for
   `character'.  Esp. used by C programmers, as `char' is
   C's typename for character data.

charityware: /char'it-ee-weir`/ n. Syn. {careware}.

chase pointers: 1. vi. To go through multiple levels of
   indirection, as in traversing a linked list or graph structure.
   Used esp. by programmers in C, where explicit pointers are a very
   common data type.  This is techspeak, but it remains jargon when
   used of human networks.  "I'm chasing pointers.  Bob said you
   could tell me who to talk to about...." See {dangling
   pointer} and {snap}.  2. [Cambridge] `pointer chase' or
   `pointer hunt': The process of going through a dump
   (interactively or on a large piece of paper printed with hex
   {runes}) following dynamic data-structures.  Used only in a
   debugging context.

chemist: [Cambridge] n. Someone who wastes computer time on
   {number-crunching} when you'd far rather the machine were doing
   something more productive, such as working out anagrams of your
   name or printing Snoopy calendars or running {life} patterns.
   May or may not refer to someone who actually studies chemistry.

Chernobyl chicken: n. See {laser chicken}.

Chernobyl packet: /cher-noh'b*l pak'*t/ n. A network packet that
   induces {network meltdown} (the result of a {broadcast storm}),
   in memory of the 1987 nuclear accident at Chernobyl in the Ukraine.
   The typical case of this is an IP Ethernet datagram that passes
   through a gateway with both source and destination Ether and IP
   address set as the respective broadcast addresses for the
   subnetworks being gated between.  Compare {Christmas tree
   packet}.

chicken head: [Commodore] n. The Commodore Business Machines logo,
   which strongly resembles a poultry part.  Rendered in ASCII as
   `C='.  With the arguable exception of the Amiga (see {amoeba}),
   Commodore's machines are notoriously crocky little {bitty box}es
   (see also {PETSCII}).  Thus, this usage may owe something to
   Philip K.  Dick's novel `Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?'
   (the basis for the movie `Blade Runner'), in which a
   `chickenhead' is a mutant with below-average intelligence.

chiclet keyboard: n. A keyboard with small rectangular or
   lozenge-shaped rubber or plastic keys that look like pieces of
   chewing gum.  (Chiclets is the brand name of a variety of chewing
   gum that does in fact resemble the keys of chiclet keyboards.)
   Used esp. to describe the original IBM PCjr keyboard.  Vendors
   unanimously liked these because they were cheap, and a lot of early
   portable and laptop products got launched using them.  Customers
   rejected the idea with almost equal unanimity, and chiclets are not
   often seen on anything larger than a digital watch any more.

chine nual: /sheen'yu-*l/ [MIT] n.,obs. The Lisp Machine Manual, so
   called because the title was wrapped around the cover so only those
   letters showed on the front.

Chinese Army technique: n. Syn. {Mongolian Hordes technique}.

choke: v. To reject input, often ungracefully.  "Nuls make System
   V's `lpr(1)' choke."  "I tried building an {EMACS} binary to
   use {X}, but `cpp(1)' choked on all those `#define's."
   See {barf}, {gag}, {vi}.

chomp: vi. To {lose}; specifically, to chew on something of
   which more was bitten off than one can.  Probably related to
   gnashing of teeth.  See {bagbiter}.  A hand gesture commonly
   accompanies this.  To perform it, hold the four fingers
   together and place the thumb against their tips.  Now open and
   close your hand rapidly to suggest a biting action (much like what
   Pac-Man does in the classic video game, though this pantomime seems
   to predate that).  The gesture alone means `chomp chomp' (see
   Verb Doubling in the "Jargon Construction" section of the
   Prependices).  The hand may be pointed at the object of complaint,
   and for real emphasis you can use both hands at once.  Doing this
   to a person is equivalent to saying "You chomper!"  If you point
   the gesture at yourself, it is a humble but humorous admission of
   some failure.  You might do this if someone told you that a program
   you had written had failed in some surprising way and you felt dumb
   for not having anticipated it.

chomper: n. Someone or something that is chomping; a loser.  See
   {loser}, {bagbiter}, {chomp}.

Christmas tree: n. A kind of RS-232 line tester or breakout box
   featuring rows of blinking red and green LEDs suggestive of
   Christmas lights.

Christmas tree packet: n. A packet with every single option set for
   whatever protocol is in use.  See {kamikaze packet}, {Chernobyl
   packet}.  (The term doubtless derives from a fanciful image of each
   little option bit being represented by a different-colored light
   bulb, all turned on.)

chrome: [from automotive slang via wargaming] n. Showy features
   added to attract users but contributing little or nothing to
   the power of a system.  "The 3D icons in Motif are just chrome,
   but they certainly are *pretty* chrome!"  Distinguished from
   {bells and whistles} by the fact that the latter are usually
   added to gratify developers' own desires for featurefulness. 
   Often used as a term of contempt.

chug: vi. To run slowly; to {grind} or {grovel}.  "The disk is
   chugging like crazy."

Church of the SubGenius: n. A mutant offshoot of
   {Discordianism} launched in 1981 as a spoof of fundamentalist
   Christianity by the `Reverend' Ivan Stang, a brilliant satirist
   with a gift for promotion.  Popular among hackers as a rich source
   of bizarre imagery and references such as "Bob" the divine
   drilling-equipment salesman, the Benevolent Space Xists, and the
   Stark Fist of Removal.  Much SubGenius theory is concerned with the
   acquisition of the mystical substance or quality of
   `slack'.

Cinderella Book: [CMU] n. `Introduction to Automata Theory,
   Languages, and Computation', by John Hopcroft and Jeffrey Ullman,
   (Addison-Wesley, 1979).  So called because the cover depicts a girl
   (putatively Cinderella) sitting in front of a Rube Goldberg device
   and holding a rope coming out of it.  The back cover depicts the
   girl with the device in shambles after she has pulled on the rope.
   See also {{book titles}}.

CI$: // n. Hackerism for `CIS', CompuServe Information Service.
   The dollar sign refers to CompuServe's rather steep line charges.  Often
   used in {sig block}s just before a CompuServe address.  Syn.
   {Compu$erve}.

Classic C: /klas'ik C/ [a play on `Coke Classic'] n. The
   C programming language as defined in the first edition of {K&R},
   with some small additions.  It is also known as `K&R C'.  The name
   came into use while C was being standardized by the ANSI X3J11
   committee.  Also `C Classic'.  This is sometimes applied
   elsewhere: thus, `X Classic', where X = Star Trek (referring to the
   original TV series) or X = PC (referring to IBM's ISA-bus machines
   as opposed to the PS/2 series).  This construction is especially
   used of product series in which the newer versions are considered
   serious losers relative to the older ones.

clean: 1. adj. Used of hardware or software designs, implies
   `elegance in the small', that is, a design or implementation that
   may not hold any surprises but does things in a way that is
   reasonably intuitive and relatively easy to comprehend from the
   outside.  The antonym is `grungy' or {crufty}.  2. v. To remove
   unneeded or undesired files in a effort to reduce clutter:  "I'm
   cleaning up my account." "I cleaned up the garbage and now have
   100 Meg free on that partition."

CLM: /C-L-M/ [Sun: `Career Limiting Move'] 1. n. An action
   endangering one's future prospects of getting plum projects and
   raises, and possibly one's job:  "His Halloween costume was a
   parody of his manager.  He won the prize for `best CLM'."
   2. adj.  Denotes extreme severity of a bug, discovered by a
   customer and obviously missed earlier because of poor testing:
   "That's a CLM bug!"

clobber: vt. To overwrite, usually unintentionally: "I walked off
   the end of the array and clobbered the stack."  Compare {mung},
   {scribble}, {trash}, and {smash the stack}.

clocks: n. Processor logic cycles, so called because each
   generally corresponds to one clock pulse in the processor's timing.
   The relative execution times of instructions on a machine are
   usually discussed in clocks rather than absolute fractions of a
   second; one good reason for this is that clock speeds for various
   models of the machine may increase as technology improves, and it
   is usually the relative times one is interested in when discussing
   the instruction set.  Compare {cycle}.

clone: n. 1. An exact duplicate: "Our product is a clone of
   their product."  Implies a legal reimplementation from
   documentation or by reverse-engineering.  Also connotes lower
   price.  2. A shoddy, spurious copy: "Their product is a
   clone of our product."  3. A blatant ripoff, most likely violating
   copyright, patent, or trade secret protections: "Your
   product is a clone of my product."  This use implies legal
   action is pending.  4. A `PC clone'; a PC-BUS/ISA or
   EISA-compatible 80x86-based microcomputer (this use is sometimes
   spelled `klone' or `PClone').  These invariably have much
   more bang for the buck than the IBM archetypes they resemble.
   5. In the construction `UNIX clone': An OS designed to deliver
   a UNIX-lookalike environment without UNIX license fees, or with
   additional `mission-critical' features such as support for
   real-time programming.  6. v. To make an exact copy of something.
   "Let me clone that" might mean "I want to borrow that paper so I
   can make a photocopy" or "Let me get a copy of that file before
   you {mung} it".

clover key: [Mac users] n. See {command key}.

clustergeeking: /kluh'st*r-gee`king/ [CMU] n.  Spending more time
   at a computer cluster doing CS homework than most people spend
   breathing.

COBOL: /koh'bol/ [COmmon Business-Oriented Language] n.
   (Synonymous with {evil}.)  A weak, verbose, and flabby language
   used by {card walloper}s to do boring mindless things on
   {dinosaur} mainframes.  Hackers believe all COBOL programmers
   are {suit}s or {code grinder}s, and no self-respecting hacker
   will ever admit to having learned the language.  Its very name is
   seldom uttered without ritual expressions of disgust or horror.
   See also {fear and loathing}, {software rot}.

COBOL fingers: /koh'bol fing'grz/ n. Reported from Sweden, a
   (hypothetical) disease one might get from coding in COBOL.  The
   language requires code verbose beyond all reason; thus it is
   alleged that programming too much in COBOL causes one's fingers to
   wear down to stubs by the endless typing.  "I refuse to type in
   all that source code again; it would give me COBOL fingers!"

code grinder: n. 1. A {suit}-wearing minion of the sort hired in
   legion strength by banks and insurance companies to implement
   payroll packages in RPG and other such unspeakable horrors.  In his
   native habitat, the code grinder often removes the suit jacket to
   reveal an underplumage consisting of button-down shirt (starch
   optional) and a tie.  In times of dire stress, the sleeves (if
   long) may be rolled up and the tie loosened about half an inch.  It
   seldom helps.  The {code grinder}'s milieu is about as far from
   hackerdom as you can get and still touch a computer; the term
   connotes pity.  See {Real World}, {suit}.  2. Used of or to a
   hacker, a really serious slur on the person's creative ability;
   connotes a design style characterized by primitive technique,
   rule-boundedness, {brute force}, and utter lack of imagination.
   Compare {card walloper}; contrast {hacker}, {real
   programmer}.

code police: [by analogy with George Orwell's `thought police'] n.
   A mythical team of Gestapo-like storm troopers that might burst
   into one's office and arrest one for violating programming style
   rules.  May be used either seriously, to underline a claim that a
   particular style violation is dangerous, or ironically, to suggest
   that the practice under discussion is condemned mainly by
   anal-retentive {weenie}s.  "Dike out that goto or the code
   police will get you!"  The ironic usage is perhaps more common.

codewalker: n. A program component that traverses other programs for
   a living.  Compilers have codewalkers in their front ends; so do
   cross-reference generators and some database front ends.  Other
   utility programs that try to do too much with source code may turn
   into codewalkers.  As in "This new `vgrind' feature would require a
   codewalker to implement."

coefficient of X: n. Hackish speech makes rather heavy use of
   pseudo-mathematical metaphors.  Four particularly important ones
   involve the terms `coefficient', `factor', `index', and
   `quotient'.  They are often loosely applied to things you
   cannot really be quantitative about, but there are subtle
   distinctions among them that convey information about the way the
   speaker mentally models whatever he or she is describing.

   `Foo factor' and `foo quotient' tend to describe something for
   which the issue is one of presence or absence.  The canonical
   example is {fudge factor}.  It's not important how much you're
   fudging; the term simply acknowledges that some fudging is needed.
   You might talk of liking a movie for its silliness factor.
   Quotient tends to imply that the property is a ratio of two opposing
   factors: "I would have won except for my luck quotient."  This
   could also be "I would have won except for the luck factor", but
   using *quotient* emphasizes that it was bad luck overpowering
   good luck (or someone else's good luck overpowering your own).

   `Foo index' and `coefficient of foo' both tend to imply
   that foo is, if not strictly measurable, at least something that
   can be larger or smaller.  Thus, you might refer to a paper or
   person as having a `high bogosity index', whereas you would be less
   likely to speak of a `high bogosity factor'.  `Foo index' suggests
   that foo is a condensation of many quantities, as in the mundane
   cost-of-living index; `coefficient of foo' suggests that foo is a
   fundamental quantity, as in a coefficient of friction.  The choice
   between these terms is often one of personal preference; e.g., some
   people might feel that bogosity is a fundamental attribute and thus
   say `coefficient of bogosity', whereas others might feel it is a
   combination of factors and thus say `bogosity index'.

cokebottle: /kohk'bot-l/ n. Any very unusual character,
   particularly one you can't type because it it isn't on your
   keyboard.  MIT people used to complain about the
   `control-meta-cokebottle' commands at SAIL, and SAIL people
   complained right back about the `altmode-altmode-cokebottle'
   commands at MIT.  After the demise of the {space-cadet
   keyboard}, `cokebottle' faded away as serious usage, but was
   often invoked humorously to describe an (unspecified) weird or
   non-intuitive keystroke command.  It may be due for a second
   inning, however.  The OSF/Motif window manager, `mwm(1)', has
   a reserved keystroke for switching to the default set of
   keybindings and behavior.  This keystroke is (believe it or not)
   `control-meta-bang' (see {bang}).  Since the exclamation point
   looks a lot like an upside down Coke bottle, Motif hackers have
   begun referring to this keystroke as `cokebottle'.  See also
   {quadruple bucky}.

cold boot: n. See {boot}.

COME FROM: n. A semi-mythical language construct dual to the `go
   to'; `COME FROM' <label> would cause the referenced label to act as a
   sort of trapdoor, so that if the program ever reached it control
   would quietly and {automagically} be transferred to the statement
   following the `COME FROM'.  `COME FROM' was first proposed in a
   {Datamation} article of December 1973 (reprinted in the April 1984
   issue of `Communications of the ACM') that parodied the
   then-raging `structured programming' {holy wars} (see
   {considered harmful}).  Mythically, some variants are the
   `assigned COME FROM' and the `computed COME FROM'
   (parodying some nasty control constructs in FORTRAN and some
   extended BASICs).  Of course, multi-tasking (or non-determinism)
   could be implemented by having more than one `COME FROM' statement
   coming from the same label.

   In some ways the FORTRAN `DO' looks like a `COME FROM'
   statement.  After the terminating statement number/`CONTINUE'
   is reached, control continues at the statement following the DO.
   Some generous FORTRANs would allow arbitrary statements (other than
   `CONTINUE') for the statement, leading to examples like:

           DO 10 I=1,LIMIT
     C imagine many lines of code here, leaving the
     C original DO statement lost in the spaghetti...
           WRITE(6,10) I,FROB(I)
      10   FORMAT(1X,I5,G10.4)

   in which the trapdoor is just after the statement labeled 10.
   (This is particularly surprising because the label doesn't appear
   to have anything to do with the flow of control at all!)

   While sufficiently astonishing to the unsuspecting reader, this
   form of `COME FROM' statement isn't completely general.  After all,
   control will eventually pass to the following statement.  The
   implementation of the general form was left to Univac FORTRAN,
   ca. 1975.  The statement `AT 100' would perform a `COME
   FROM 100'.  It was intended strictly as a debugging aid, with dire
   consequences promised to anyone so deranged as to use it in
   production code.  More horrible things had already been perpetrated
   in production languages, however; doubters need only contemplate
   the `ALTER' verb in {COBOL}.

   `COME FROM' was supported under its own name for the first
   time 15 years later, in C-INTERCAL (see {INTERCAL},
   {retrocomputing}); knowledgeable observers are still reeling
   from the shock.

comm mode: /kom mohd/ [ITS: from the feature supporting on-line
   chat; the term may spelled with one or two m's] Syn. for {talk
   mode}.

command key: [Mac users] n. The Macintosh key with the cloverleaf
   graphic on its keytop; sometimes referred to as `flower',
   `pretzel', `clover', `propeller', `beanie' (an apparent
   reference to the major feature of a propeller beanie), or
   {splat}.  The Mac's equivalent of an {ALT} key.  The
   proliferation of terms for this creature may illustrate one subtle
   peril of iconic interfaces.

comment out: vt. To surround a section of code with comment
   delimiters or to prefix every line in the section with a comment
   marker; this prevents it from being compiled or interpreted.  Often
   done when the code is redundant or obsolete, but you want to leave
   it in the source to make the intent of the active code clearer;
   also when the code in that section is broken and you want to bypass
   it in order to debug some other part of the code.  Compare
   {condition out}, usually the preferred technique in languages
   (such as {C}) that make it possible.

Commonwealth Hackish:: n. Hacker jargon as spoken outside
   the U.S., esp. in the British Commonwealth.  It is reported that
   Commonwealth speakers are more likely to pronounce truncations like
   `char' and `soc', etc., as spelled (/char/, /sok/), as
   opposed to American /keir/ and /sohsh/.  Dots in {newsgroup}
   names tend to be pronounced more often (so soc.wibble is /sok dot
   wib'l/ rather than /sohsh wib'l/).  The prefix {meta} may be
   pronounced /mee't*/; similarly, Greek letter beta is often
   /bee't*/, zeta is often /zee't*/, and so forth.  Preferred
   metasyntactic variables include `eek', `ook',
   `frodo', and `bilbo'; `wibble', `wobble', and
   in emergencies `wubble'; `banana', `wombat',
   `frog', {fish}, and so on and on (see {foo}, sense 4).

   Alternatives to verb doubling include suffixes `-o-rama',
   `frenzy' (as in feeding frenzy), and `city' (examples: "barf
   city!" "hack-o-rama!" "core dump frenzy!").  Finally, note
   that the American terms `parens', `brackets', and `braces' for (),
   [], and {} are uncommon; Commonwealth hackish prefers
   `brackets', `square brackets', and `curly brackets'.  Also, the
   use of `pling' for {bang} is common outside the United States.

   See also {attoparsec}, {calculator}, {chemist}, {console
   jockey}, {fish}, {go-faster stripes}, {grunge}, {hakspek},
   {heavy metal}, {leaky heap}, {lord high fixer}, {noddy},
   {psychedelicware}, {plingnet}, {raster blaster}, {seggie},
   {terminal junkie}, {tick-list features}, {weeble},
   {weasel}, {YABA}, and notes or definitions under {Bad Thing},
   {barf}, {bogus}, {bum}, {chase pointers}, {cosmic rays},
   {crippleware}, {crunch}, {dodgy}, {gonk}, {hamster},
   {hardwarily}, {mess-dos}, {nybble}, {proglet}, {root},
   {SEX}, {tweak}, and {xyzzy}.

compact: adj. Of a design, describes the valuable property that it
   can all be apprehended at once in one's head.  This generally means
   the thing created from the design can be used with greater facility
   and fewer errors than an equivalent tool that is not compact.
   Compactness does not imply triviality or lack of power; for
   example, C is compact and FORTRAN is not, but C is more powerful
   than FORTRAN.  Designs become non-compact through accreting
   {feature}s and {cruft} that don't merge cleanly into the
   overall design scheme (thus, some fans of {Classic C} maintain
   that ANSI C is no longer compact).

compiler jock: n. See {jock} (sense 2).

compress: [UNIX] vt. When used without a qualifier, generally
   refers to {crunch}ing of a file using a particular
   C implementation of Lempel-Ziv compression by James A. Woods et al. and
   widely circulated via {USENET}.  Use of {crunch} itself in this
   sense is rare among UNIX hackers.

Compu$erve: n. See {CI$}.

computer confetti: n. Syn. {chad}.  Though this term is common,
   this use of the punched-card chad is not a good idea, as the pieces
   are stiff and have sharp corners that could injure the eyes.  GLS
   reports that he once attended a wedding at MIT during which he and
   a few other guests enthusiastically threw chad instead of rice. The
   groom later grumbled that he and his bride had spent most of the
   evening trying to get the stuff out of their hair.

computer geek: n. One who eats (computer) bugs for a living.  One
   who fulfills all the dreariest negative stereotypes about hackers:
   an asocial, malodorous, pasty-faced monomaniac with all the
   personality of a cheese grater.  Cannot be used by outsiders
   without implied insult to all hackers; compare black-on-black usage
   of `nigger'.  A computer geek may be either a fundamentally
   clueless individual or a proto-hacker in {larval stage}.  Also
   called `turbo nerd', `turbo geek'.  See also
   {clustergeeking}, {geek out}, {wannabee}, {terminal
   junkie}.

computron: /kom'pyoo-tron`/ n. 1. A notional unit of computing
   power combining instruction speed and storage capacity, dimensioned
   roughly in instructions-per-second times megabytes-of-main-store
   times megabytes-of-mass-storage.  "That machine can't run GNU
   EMACS, it doesn't have enough computrons!"  This usage is usually
   found in metaphors that treat computing power as a fungible
   commodity good, like a crop yield or diesel horsepower.  See
   {bitty box}, {Get a real computer!}, {toy}, {crank}.
   2. A mythical subatomic particle that bears the unit quantity of
   computation or information, in much the same way that an electron
   bears one unit of electric charge (see also {bogon}).  An
   elaborate pseudo-scientific theory of computrons has been developed
   based on the physical fact that the molecules in a solid object
   move more rapidly as it is heated.  It is argued that an object
   melts because the molecules have lost their information about where
   they are supposed to be (that is, they have emitted computrons).
   This explains why computers get so hot and require air
   conditioning; they use up computrons.  Conversely, it should be
   possible to cool down an object by placing it in the path of a
   computron beam.  It is believed that this may also explain why
   machines that work at the factory fail in the computer room: the
   computrons there have been all used up by the other hardware.
   (This theory probably owes something to the "Warlock" stories
   by Larry Niven, the best known being "What Good is a Glass
   Dagger?", in which magic is fueled by an exhaustible natural
   resource called `mana'.)

condition out: vt. To prevent a section of code from being compiled
   by surrounding it with a conditional-compilation directive whose
   condition is always false.  The {canonical} examples are `#if
   0' (or `#ifdef notdef', though some find this {bletcherous})
   and `#endif' in C.  Compare {comment out}.

condom: n. 1. The protective plastic bag that accompanies 3.5-inch
   microfloppy diskettes.  Rarely, also used of (paper) disk envelopes.
   Unlike the write protect tab, the condom (when left on) not only
   impedes the practice of {SEX} but has also been shown to have a high
   failure rate as drive mechanisms attempt to access the disk --- and
   can even fatally frustrate insertion.  2. The protective cladding
   on a {light pipe}.

connector conspiracy: [probably came into prominence with the
   appearance of the KL-10 (one model of the {PDP-10}), none of
   whose connectors matched anything else] n. The tendency of
   manufacturers (or, by extension, programmers or purveyors of
   anything) to come up with new products that don't fit together
   with the old stuff, thereby making you buy either all new stuff or
   expensive interface devices.  The KL-10 Massbus connector was
   actually *patented* by DEC, which reputedly refused to license
   the design and thus effectively locked third parties out of
   competition for the lucrative Massbus peripherals market.  This is
   a source of never-ending frustration for the diehards who maintain
   older PDP-10 or VAX systems.  Their CPUs work fine, but they are
   stuck with dying, obsolescent disk and tape drives with low
   capacity and high power requirements.

   In these latter days of open-systems computing this term has fallen
   somewhat into disuse, to be replaced by the observation that
   "Standards are great!  There are so *many* of them to choose
   from!"  Compare {backward combatability}.

cons: /konz/ or /kons/ [from LISP] 1. vt. To add a new element
   to a specified list, esp. at the top.  "OK, cons picking a
   replacement for the console TTY onto the agenda."  2. `cons up':
   vt. To synthesize from smaller pieces: "to cons up an example".

   In LISP itself, `cons' is the most fundamental operation for
   building structures.  It takes any two objects and returns a
   `dot-pair' or two-branched tree with one object hanging from each
   branch.  Because the result of a cons is an object, it can be used
   to build binary trees of any shape and complexity.  Hackers think
   of it as a sort of universal constructor, and that is where the
   jargon meanings spring from.

considered harmful: adj. Edsger W. Dijkstra's note in the
   March 1968 `Communications of the ACM', "Goto Statement
   Considered Harmful", fired the first salvo in the structured
   programming wars.  Amusingly, the ACM considered the resulting
   acrimony sufficiently harmful that it will (by policy) no longer
   print an article taking so assertive a position against a coding
   practice.  In the ensuing decades, a large number of both serious
   papers and parodies have borne titles of the form "X
   considered Y".  The structured-programming wars eventually blew
   over with the realization that both sides were wrong, but use of
   such titles has remained as a persistent minor in-joke (the
   `considered silly' found at various places in this lexicon is
   related).

console:: n. 1. The operator's station of a {mainframe}.  In
   times past, this was a privileged location that conveyed godlike
   powers to anyone with fingers on its keys.  Under UNIX and other
   modern timesharing OSes, such privileges are guarded by passwords
   instead, and the console is just the {tty} the system was booted
   from.  Some of the mystique remains, however, and it is traditional
   for sysadmins to post urgent messages to all users from the console
   (on UNIX, /dev/console).  2. On microcomputer UNIX boxes, the main
   screen and keyboard (as opposed to character-only terminals talking
   to a serial port).  Typically only the console can do real graphics
   or run {X}.  See also {CTY}.

console jockey: n. See {terminal junkie}.

content-free: [by analogy with techspeak `context-free'] adj.
   Used of a message that adds nothing to the recipient's knowledge.
   Though this adjective is sometimes applied to {flamage}, it more
   usually connotes derision for communication styles that exalt form
   over substance or are centered on concerns irrelevant to the
   subject ostensibly at hand.  Perhaps most used with reference to
   speeches by company presidents and other professional manipulators.
   "Content-free?  Uh...that's anything printed on glossy
   paper."  See also {four-color glossies}.  "He gave a talk on
   the implications of electronic networks for postmodernism and the
   fin-de-siecle aesthetic.  It was content-free."

control-C: vi. 1. "Stop whatever you are doing."  From the
   interrupt character used on many operating systems to abort a
   running program.  Considered silly.  2. interj. Among BSD UNIX
   hackers, the canonical humorous response to "Give me a break!"

control-O: vi. "Stop talking."  From the character used on some
   operating systems to abort output but allow the program to keep on
   running.  Generally means that you are not interested in hearing
   anything more from that person, at least on that topic; a standard
   response to someone who is flaming.  Considered silly.

control-Q: vi. "Resume."  From the ASCII XON character used to
   undo a previous control-S (in fact it is also pronounced
   XON /X-on/).

control-S: vi. "Stop talking for a second."  From the ASCII XOFF
   character (this is also pronounced XOFF /X-of/).  Control-S
   differs from {control-O} in that the person is asked to stop
   talking (perhaps because you are on the phone) but will be allowed
   to continue when you're ready to listen to him --- as opposed to
   control-O, which has more of the meaning of "Shut up."  Considered
   silly.

Conway's Law: prov. The rule that the organization of the software and
   the organization of the software team will be congruent; originally
   stated as "If you have four groups working on a compiler, you'll
   get a 4-pass compiler".

   This was originally promulgated by Melvin Conway, an early
   proto-hacker who wrote an assembler for the Burroughs 220 called
   SAVE.  The name `SAVE' didn't stand for anything; it was just that
   you lost fewer card decks and listings because they all had SAVE
   written on them.

cookbook: [from amateur electronics and radio] n. A book of small
   code segments that the reader can use to do various {magic}
   things in programs.  One current example is the `PostScript
   Language Tutorial and Cookbook' by Adobe Systems, Inc
   (Addison-Wesley, ISBN 0-201-10179-3) which has recipes for things
   like wrapping text around arbitrary curves and making 3D fonts.
   Cookbooks, slavishly followed, can lead one into {voodoo
   programming}, but are useful for hackers trying to {monkey up}
   small programs in unknown languages.  This is analogous to the role
   of phrasebooks in human languages.

cookie: n. A handle, transaction ID, or other token of agreement
   between cooperating programs.  "I give him a packet, he gives me
   back a cookie."  The claim check you get from a dry-cleaning shop
   is a perfect mundane example of a cookie; the only thing it's
   useful for is to relate a later transaction to this one (so you get
   the same clothes back).  Compare {magic cookie}; see also
   {fortune cookie}.

cookie bear: n. Syn. {cookie monster}.

cookie file: n. A collection of {fortune cookie}s in a format
   that facilitates retrieval by a fortune program.  There are several
   different ones in public distribution, and site admins often
   assemble their own from various sources including this lexicon.

cookie monster: [from "Sesame Street"] n. Any of a family of
   early (1970s) hacks reported on {{TOPS-10}}, {{ITS}}, {{Multics}},
   and elsewhere that would lock up either the victim's terminal (on a
   time-sharing machine) or the {{console}} (on a batch
   {mainframe}), repeatedly demanding "I WANT A COOKIE".  The
   required responses ranged in complexity from "COOKIE" through
   "HAVE A COOKIE" and upward.  See also {wabbit}.

copper: n. Conventional electron-carrying network cable with a
   core conductor of copper --- or aluminum!  Opposed to {light
   pipe} or, say, a short-range microwave link.

copy protection: n. A class of clever methods for preventing
   incompetent pirates from stealing software and legitimate customers
   from using it.  Considered silly.

copybroke: /ko'pee-brohk/ adj. [play on `copyright'] Used to
   describe an instance of a copy-protected program that has been
   `broken'; that is, a copy with the copy-protection scheme disabled.
   Syn.  {copywronged}.

copyleft: /kop'ee-left/ [play on `copyright'] n. 1. The
   copyright notice (`General Public License') carried by {GNU}
   {EMACS} and other Free Software Foundation software, granting reuse
   and reproduction rights to all comers (but see also {General
   Public Virus}).  2. By extension, any copyright notice intended to
   achieve similar aims.

copywronged: /ko'pee-rongd/ [play on `copyright'] adj. Syn. for
   {copybroke}.

core: n. Main storage or RAM.  Dates from the days of ferrite-core
   memory; now archaic as techspeak most places outside IBM, but also
   still used in the UNIX community and by old-time hackers or those
   who would sound like them.  Some derived idioms are quite current;
   `in core', for example, means `in memory' (as opposed to `on
   disk'), and both {core dump} and the `core image' or `core
   file' produced by one are terms in favor.  Commonwealth hackish
   prefers {store}.

core dump: n. [common {Iron Age} jargon, preserved by UNIX]
   1. [techspeak] A copy of the contents of {core}, produced when a
   process is aborted by certain kinds of internal error.  2. By
   extension, used for humans passing out, vomiting, or registering
   extreme shock.  "He dumped core.  All over the floor.  What a
   mess."  "He heard about X and dumped core."  3. Occasionally
   used for a human rambling on pointlessly at great length; esp. in
   apology: "Sorry, I dumped core on you".  4. A recapitulation of
   knowledge (compare {bits}, sense 1).  Hence, spewing all one
   knows about a topic, esp. in a lecture or answer to an exam
   question.  "Short, concise answers are better than core dumps"
   (from the instructions to an exam at Columbia; syn.  {brain
   dump}).  See {core}.

core leak: n. Syn. {memory leak}.

Core Wars: n. A game between `assembler' programs in a
   simulated machine, where the objective is to kill your opponent's
   program by overwriting it.  Popularized by A. K. Dewdney's column
   in `Scientific American' magazine, this was actually
   devised by Victor Vyssotsky, Robert Morris, and Dennis Ritchie in
   the early 1960s (their original game was called `Darwin' and ran on
   a PDP-1 at Bell Labs).  See {core}.

corge: /korj/ [originally, the name of a cat] n. Yet another
   meta-syntactic variable, invented by Mike Gallaher and propagated
   by the {GOSMACS} documentation.  See {grault}.

cosmic rays: n. Notionally, the cause of {bit rot}.  However, this is
   a semi-independent usage that may be invoked as a humorous way to
   {handwave} away any minor {randomness} that doesn't seem worth the
   bother of investigating.  "Hey, Eric --- I just got a burst of
   garbage on my {tube}, where did that come from?"  "Cosmic rays, I
   guess."  Compare {sunspots}, {phase of the moon}.  The British seem
   to prefer the usage `cosmic showers'; `alpha particles' is also
   heard, because stray alpha particles passing through a memory chip
   can cause single-bit errors (this becomes increasingly more likely
   as memory sizes and densities increase).

   Factual note: Alpha particles cause bit rot, cosmic rays do not
   (except occasionally in spaceborne computers).  Intel could not
   explain random bit drops in their early chips, and one hypothesis
   was cosmic rays.  So they created the World's Largest Lead Safe,
   using 25 tons of the stuff, and used two identical boards for
   testing.  One was placed in the safe, one outside.  The hypothesis
   was that if cosmic rays were causing the bit drops, they should see
   a statistically significant difference between the error rates on
   the two boards.  They did not observe such a difference.  Further
   investigation demonstrated conclusively that the bit drops were due
   to alpha particle emissions from thorium (and to a much lesser
   degree uranium) in the encapsulation material.  Since it is
   impossible to eliminate these radioactives (they are uniformly
   distributed through the earth's crust, with the statistically
   insignificant exception of uranium lodes) it became obvious that
   you have to design memories to withstand these hits.

cough and die: v. Syn. {barf}.  Connotes that the program is
   throwing its hands up by design rather than because of a bug or
   oversight.  "The parser saw a control-A in its input where it was
   looking for a printable, so it coughed and died."

cowboy: [Sun, from William Gibson's {cyberpunk} SF] n. Synonym
   for {hacker}.  It is reported that at Sun this word is often
   said with reverence.

CP/M:: /C-P-M/ n. [Control Program for Microcomputers] An
   early microcomputer {OS} written by hacker Gary Kildall for
   8080- and Z80-based machines, very popular in the late 1970s but
   virtually wiped out by MS-DOS after the release of the IBM PC
   in 1981.  Legend has it that Kildall's company blew its chance to
   write the OS for the IBM PC because Kildall decided to spend a day
   IBM's reps wanted to meet with him enjoying the perfect flying
   weather in his private plane.  Many of CP/M's features and conventions
   strongly resemble those of early DEC operating systems such as
   {{TOPS-10}}, OS/8, RSTS, and RSX-11.  See {{MS-DOS}},
   {operating system}.

CPU Wars: /C-P-U worz/ n. A 1979 large-format comic by Chas
   Andres chronicling the attempts of the brainwashed androids of IPM
   (Impossible to Program Machines) to conquer and destroy the
   peaceful denizens of HEC (Human Engineered Computers).  This rather
   transparent allegory featured many references to {ADVENT} and
   the immortal line "Eat flaming death, minicomputer mongrels!"
   (uttered, of course, by an IPM stormtrooper).  It is alleged that
   the author subsequently received a letter of appreciation on IBM
   company stationery from the head of IBM's Thomas J. Watson Research
   Laboratories (then, as now, one of the few islands of true
   hackerdom in the IBM archipelago).  The lower loop of the B in the
   IBM logo, it is said, had been carefully whited out.  See {eat
   flaming death}.

cracker: n. One who breaks security on a system.  Coined ca. 1985
   by hackers in defense against journalistic misuse of {hacker}
   (q.v., sense 8).  An earlier attempt to establish `worm' in this
   sense around 1981--82 on USENET was largely a failure.

crank: [from automotive slang] vt. Verb used to describe the
   performance of a machine, especially sustained performance.  "This
   box cranks (or, cranks at) about 6 {megaflops}, with a burst mode
   of twice that on vectorized operations."

crash: 1. n. A sudden, usually drastic failure.  Most often said
   of the {system} (q.v., sense 1), sometimes of magnetic disk
   drives.  "Three {luser}s lost their files in last night's disk
   crash."  A disk crash that involves the read/write heads dropping
   onto the surface of the disks and scraping off the oxide may also
   be referred to as a `head crash', whereas the term `system
   crash' usually, though not always, implies that the operating
   system or other software was at fault.  2. v. To fail suddenly.
   "Has the system just crashed?"  "Something crashed the OS!" See
   {down}.  Also used transitively to indicate the cause of the
   crash (usually a person or a program, or both).  "Those idiots
   playing {SPACEWAR} crashed the system." 3. vi. Sometimes said
   of people hitting the sack after a long {hacking run}; see
   {gronk out}.

crash and burn: vi.,n. A spectacular crash, in the mode of the
   conclusion of the car-chase scene in the movie "Bullitt" and
   many subsequent imitators.  Sun-3 monitors losing the flyback
   transformer and lightning strikes on VAX-11/780 backplanes are
   notable crash and burn generators.  The construction
   `crash-and-burn machine' is reported for a computer used
   exclusively for alpha or {beta} testing, or reproducing bugs
   (i.e., not for development).  The implication is that it wouldn't
   be such a disaster if that machine crashed, since only the testers
   would be inconvenienced.

crawling horror: n. Ancient crufty hardware or software that is
   kept obstinately alive by forces beyond the control of the hackers
   at a site.  Like {dusty deck} or {gonkulator}, but connotes
   that the thing described is not just an irritation but an active
   menace to health and sanity.  "Mostly we code new stuff in C, but
   they pay us to maintain one big FORTRAN II application from
   nineteen-sixty-X that's a real crawling horror...."  Compare
   {WOMBAT}.

cray: /kray/ n. 1. (properly, capitalized) One of the line of
   supercomputers designed by Cray Research.  2. Any supercomputer at
   all.  3. The {canonical} {number-crunching} machine.

   The term is actually the lowercased last name of Seymour Cray, a
   noted computer architect and co-founder of the company.  Numerous
   vivid legends surround him, some true and some admittedly invented
   by Cray Research brass to shape their corporate culture and image.

cray instability: n. A shortcoming of a program or algorithm that
   manifests itself only when a large problem is being run on a powerful
   machine (see {cray}).  Generally more subtle than bugs that can
   be detected in smaller problems running on a workstation or mini.

crayola: /kray-oh'l*/ n. A super-mini or -micro computer that
   provides some reasonable percentage of supercomputer performance
   for an unreasonably low price.  Might also be a {killer micro}.

crayon: n. 1. Someone who works on Cray supercomputers.  More
   specifically, it implies a programmer, probably of the CDC ilk,
   probably male, and almost certainly wearing a tie (irrespective of
   gender).  Systems types who have a UNIX background tend not to be
   described as crayons.  2. A {computron} (sense 2) that
   participates only in {number-crunching}.  3. A unit of
   computational power equal to that of a single Cray-1.  There is a
   standard joke about this that derives from an old Crayola crayon
   promotional gimmick: When you buy 64 crayons you get a free
   sharpener.

creationism: n. The (false) belief that large, innovative designs
   can be completely specified in advance and then painlessly magicked
   out of the void by the normal efforts of a team of normally
   talented programmers.  In fact, experience has shown repeatedly
   that good designs arise only from evolutionary, exploratory
   interaction between one (or at most a small handful of)
   exceptionally able designer(s) and an active user population ---
   and that the first try at a big new idea is always wrong.
   Unfortunately, because these truths don't fit the planning models
   beloved of {management}, they are generally ignored.

creeping elegance: n. Describes a tendency for parts of a design to
   become {elegant} past the point of diminishing return.  This
   often happens at the expense of the less interesting parts of the
   design, the schedule, and other things deemed important in the
   {Real World}.  See also {creeping featurism}, {second-system
   effect}, {tense}.

creeping featurism: /kree'ping fee'chr-izm/ n. 1. Describes a
   systematic tendency to load more {chrome} and {feature}s onto
   systems at the expense of whatever elegance they may have possessed
   when originally designed.  See also {feeping creaturism}.  "You
   know, the main problem with {BSD} UNIX has always been creeping
   featurism."  2. More generally, the tendency for anything
   complicated to become even more complicated because people keep
   saying "Gee, it would be even better if it had this feature
   too".  (See {feature}.)  The result is usually a patchwork
   because it grew one ad-hoc step at a time, rather than being
   planned.  Planning is a lot of work, but it's easy to add just one
   extra little feature to help someone ... and then another ...
   and another....  When creeping featurism gets out of hand, it's
   like a cancer.  Usually this term is used to describe computer
   programs, but it could also be said of the federal government, the
   IRS 1040 form, and new cars.  A similar phenomenon sometimes
   afflicts conscious redesigns; see {second-system effect}.  See
   also {creeping elegance}.

creeping featuritis: /kree'ping fee'-chr-i:`t*s/ n. Variant of
   {creeping featurism}, with its own spoonerization: `feeping
   creaturitis'.  Some people like to reserve this form for the
   disease as it actually manifests in software or hardware, as
   opposed to the lurking general tendency in designers' minds.  (After
   all, -ism means `condition' or `pursuit of', whereas -itis usually
   means `inflammation of'.)

cretin: /kret'n/ or /kree'tn/ n. Congenital {loser}; an obnoxious
   person; someone who can't do anything right.  It has been observed
   that many American hackers tend to favor the British pronunciation
   /kre'tn/ over standard American /kree'tn/; it is thought this may
   be due to the insidious phonetic influence of Monty Python's Flying
   Circus.

cretinous: /kret'n-*s/ or /kreet'n-*s/ adj. Wrong; stupid;
   non-functional; very poorly designed.  Also used pejoratively of
   people.  See {dread high-bit disease} for an example.
   Approximate synonyms: {bletcherous}, `bagbiting' (see
   {bagbiter}), {losing}, {brain-damaged}.

crippleware: n. 1. Software that has some important functionality
   deliberately removed, so as to entice potential users to pay for a
   working version.  2. [Cambridge] {Guiltware} that exhorts you to
   donate to some charity (compare {careware}).  3. Hardware
   deliberately crippled, which can be upgraded to a more expensive
   model by a trivial change (e.g., cutting a jumper).

critical mass: n. In physics, the minimum amount of fissionable
   material required to sustain a chain reaction.  Of a software
   product, describes a condition of the software such that fixing one
   bug introduces one plus {epsilon} bugs.  When software achieves
   critical mass, it can only be discarded and rewritten.

crlf: /ker'l*f/, sometimes /kru'l*f/ or /C-R-L-F/ n. (often
   capitalized as `CRLF') A carriage return (CR) followed by a line
   feed (LF).  More loosely, whatever it takes to get you from the
   end of one line of text to the beginning of the next line.  See
   {newline}, {terpri}.  Under {{UNIX}} influence this usage
   has become less common (UNIX uses a bare line feed as its `CRLF').

crock: [from the obvious mainstream scatologism] n. 1. An awkward
   feature or programming technique that ought to be made cleaner.
   Using small integers to represent error codes without the
   program interpreting them to the user (as in, for example, UNIX
   `make(1)', which returns code 139 for a process that dies due
   to {segfault}).  2. A technique that works acceptably, but which
   is quite prone to failure if disturbed in the least, for example
   depending on the machine opcodes having particular bit patterns so
   that you can use instructions as data words too; a tightly woven,
   almost completely unmodifiable structure.  See {kluge},
   {brittle}.  Also in the adjectives `crockish' and
   `crocky', and the nouns `crockishness' and `crockitude'.

cross-post: [USENET] vi. To post a single article simultaneously to
   several newsgroups.  Distinguished from posting the article
   repeatedly, once to each newsgroup, which causes people to see it
   multiple times (this is very bad form).  Gratuitous cross-posting
   without a Followup-To line directing responses to a single followup
   group is frowned upon, as it tends to cause {followup} articles
   to go to inappropriate newsgroups when people respond to only one
   part of the original posting.

crudware: /kruhd'weir/ n. Pejorative term for the hundreds of
   megabytes of low-quality {freeware} circulated by user's groups
   and BBS systems in the micro-hobbyist world.  "Yet *another*
   set of disk catalog utilities for {{MS-DOS}}?  What crudware!"

cruft: /kruhft/ [back-formation from {crufty}] 1. n. An
   unpleasant substance.  The dust that gathers under your bed is
   cruft; the TMRC Dictionary correctly noted that attacking it with a
   broom only produces more.  2. n. The results of shoddy
   construction.  3. vt. [from `hand cruft', pun on `hand craft'] To
   write assembler code for something normally (and better) done by a
   compiler (see {hand-hacking}).  4. n. Excess; superfluous junk.
   Esp. used of redundant or superseded code.

cruft together: vt. (also `cruft up') To throw together
   something ugly but temporarily workable.  Like vt. {kluge up},
   but more pejorative.  "There isn't any program now to reverse all
   the lines of a file, but I can probably cruft one together in about
   10 minutes."  See {hack together}, {hack up}, {kluge up},
   {crufty}.

cruftsmanship: /kruhfts'm*n-ship / n. [from {cruft}] The
   antithesis of craftsmanship.

crufty: /kruhf'tee/ [origin unknown; poss. from `crusty' or
   `cruddy'] adj. 1. Poorly built, possibly over-complex.  The
   {canonical} example is "This is standard old crufty DEC
   software".  In fact, one fanciful theory of the origin of `crufty'
   holds that was originally a mutation of `crusty' applied to DEC
   software so old that the `s' characters were tall and skinny, looking
   more like `f' characters.  2. Unpleasant, especially to the touch,
   often with encrusted junk.  Like spilled coffee smeared with peanut
   butter and catsup.  3. Generally unpleasant.  4. (sometimes spelled
   `cruftie') n. A small crufty object (see {frob}); often one
   that doesn't fit well into the scheme of things.  "A LISP property
   list is a good place to store crufties (or, collectively,
   {random} cruft)."

crumb: n. Two binary digits; a {quad}.  Larger than a {bit},
   smaller than a {nybble}.  Considered silly.  Syn. {tayste}.

crunch: 1. vi. To process, usually in a time-consuming or
   complicated way.  Connotes an essentially trivial operation that is
   nonetheless painful to perform.  The pain may be due to the
   triviality's being embedded in a loop from 1 to 1,000,000,000.
   "FORTRAN programs do mostly {number-crunching}."  2. vt. To
   reduce the size of a file by a complicated scheme that produces bit
   configurations completely unrelated to the original data, such as
   by a Huffman code.  (The file ends up looking like a paper document
   would if somebody crunched the paper into a wad.)  Since such
   compression usually takes more computations than simpler methods
   such as run-length encoding, the term is doubly appropriate.  (This
   meaning is usually used in the construction `file crunch(ing)' to
   distinguish it from {number-crunching}.)  See {compress}.
   3. n. The character `#'.  Used at XEROX and CMU, among other
   places.  See {{ASCII}}.  4. vt. To squeeze program source into a
   minimum-size representation that will still compile or execute.
   The term came into being specifically for a famous program on the
   BBC micro that crunched BASIC source in order to make it run more
   quickly (it was a wholly interpretive BASIC, so the number of
   characters mattered).  {Obfuscated C Contest} entries are often
   crunched; see the first example under that entry.

cruncha cruncha cruncha: /kruhn'ch* kruhn'ch* kruhn'ch*/ interj.
   An encouragement sometimes muttered to a machine bogged down in a
   serious {grovel}.  Also describes a notional sound made by
   groveling hardware.  See {wugga wugga}, {grind} (sense 3).

cryppie: /krip'ee/ n. A cryptographer.  One who hacks or implements
   cryptographic software or hardware.

CTSS: /C-T-S-S/ n. Compatible Time-Sharing System.  An early
   (1963) experiment in the design of interactive time-sharing
   operating systems, ancestral to {{Multics}}, {{UNIX}}, and
   {{ITS}}.  The name {{ITS}} (Incompatible Time-sharing System)
   was a hack on CTSS, meant both as a joke and to express some basic
   differences in philosophy about the way I/O services should be
   presented to user programs.

CTY: /sit'ee/ or /C-T-Y/ n. [MIT] The terminal physically
   associated with a computer's system {{console}}.  The term is a
   contraction of `Console {tty}', that is, `Console TeleTYpe'.
   This {{ITS}}- and {{TOPS-10}}-associated term has become less
   common, as most UNIX hackers simply refer to the CTY as `the
   console'.

cube: n. 1. [short for `cubicle'] A module in the open-plan
   offices used at many programming shops.  "I've got the manuals in
   my cube."  2. A NeXT machine (which resembles a matte-black cube).

cubing: [parallel with `tubing'] vi. 1. Hacking on an IPSC (Intel
   Personal SuperComputer) hypercube.  "Louella's gone cubing
   *again*!!"  2. Hacking Rubik's Cube or related puzzles,
   either physically or mathematically.  3. An indescribable form of
   self-torture (see sense 1 or #2).

cursor dipped in X: n. There are a couple of metaphors in English
   of the form `pen dipped in X' (perhaps the most common values of X
   are `acid', `bile', and `vitriol').  These map over neatly to this
   hackish usage (the cursor being what moves, leaving letters behind,
   when one is composing on-line).  "Talk about a {nastygram}!  He
   must've had his cursor dipped in acid when he wrote that one!"

cuspy: /kuhs'pee/ [WPI: from the DEC acronym CUSP, for `Commonly
   Used System Program', i.e., a utility program used by many people]
   adj. 1. (of a program) Well-written.  2. Functionally excellent.  A
   program that performs well and interfaces well to users is cuspy.
   See {rude}.  3. [NYU] Said of an attractive woman, especially one
   regarded as available.  Implies a certain curvaceousness.

cut a tape: [poss. fr. mainstream `cut a check' or from the
   recording industry's `cut a record'] vi. To write a software or
   document distribution on magnetic tape for shipment.  Has nothing
   to do with physically cutting the medium!  Though this usage is
   quite widespread, one never speaks of analogously `cutting a disk'
   or anything else in this sense.

cybercrud: /si:'ber-kruhd/ [coined by Ted Nelson] n. Obfuscatory
   tech-talk.  Verbiage with a high {MEGO} factor.  The computer
   equivalent of bureaucratese.

cyberpunk: /si:'ber-puhnk/ [orig. by SF writer Bruce Bethke and/or
   editor Gardner Dozois] n.,adj. A subgenre of SF launched in 1982
   by William Gibson's epoch-making novel `Neuromancer' (though
   its roots go back through Vernor Vinge's `True Names' (see
   the Bibliography) to John Brunner's 1975 novel `The Shockwave
   Rider').  Gibson's near-total ignorance of computers and the
   present-day hacker culture enabled him to speculate about the role
   of computers and hackers in the future in ways hackers have since
   found both irritatingly na"ive and tremendously stimulating.
   Gibson's work was widely imitated, in particular by the short-lived
   but innovative "Max Headroom" TV series.  See {cyberspace},
   {ice}, {go flatline}.

cyberspace: /si:'ber-spays/ n. 1. Notional `information-space'
   loaded with visual cues and navigable with brain-computer
   interfaces called `cyberspace decks'; a characteristic prop of
   {cyberpunk} SF.  At the time of this writing (mid-1991),
   serious efforts to construct {virtual reality} interfaces
   modeled explicitly on Gibsonian cyberspace are already under way,
   using more conventional devices such as glove sensors and binocular
   TV headsets.  Few hackers are prepared to deny outright the
   possibility of a cyberspace someday evolving out of the network
   (see {network, the}).  2. Occasionally, the metaphoric location
   of the mind of a person in {hack mode}.  Some hackers report
   experiencing strong eidetic imagery when in hack mode;
   interestingly, independent reports from multiple sources suggest
   that there are common features to the experience.  In particular,
   the dominant colors of this subjective `cyberspace' are often
   gray and silver, and the imagery often involves constellations of
   marching dots, elaborate shifting patterns of lines and angles, or
   moire patterns.

cycle: 1. n. The basic unit of computation.  What every hacker
   wants more of (noted hacker Bill Gosper describes himself as a
   "cycle junkie"). One can describe an instruction as taking so
   many `clock cycles'.  Often the computer can access its
   memory once on every clock cycle, and so one speaks also of
   `memory cycles'.  These are technical meanings of {cycle}.  The
   jargon meaning comes from the observation that there are only so
   many cycles per second, and when you are sharing a computer the
   cycles get divided up among the users.  The more cycles the
   computer spends working on your program rather than someone else's,
   the faster your program will run.  That's why every hacker wants
   more cycles: so he can spend less time waiting for the computer to
   respond.  2. By extension, a notional unit of *human* thought
   power, emphasizing that lots of things compete for the typical
   hacker's think time.  "I refused to get involved with the Rubik's
   Cube back when it was big.  Knew I'd burn too many cycles on it if
   I let myself."  3. vt. Syn. {bounce}, {120 reset}; from the
   phrase `cycle power'. "Cycle the machine again, that serial port's
   still hung."

cycle crunch: n. A situation where the number of people trying to
   use the computer simultaneously has reached the point where no one
   can get enough cycles because they are spread too thin and the
   system has probably begun to {thrash}.  This is an inevitable
   result of Parkinson's Law applied to timesharing.  Usually the only
   solution is to buy more computer.  Happily, this has rapidly become
   easier in recent years, so much so that the very term `cycle
   crunch' now has a faintly archaic flavor; most hackers now use
   workstations or personal computers as opposed to traditional
   timesharing systems.

cycle drought: n. A scarcity of cycles.  It may be due to a {cycle
   crunch}, but it could also occur because part of the computer is
   temporarily not working, leaving fewer cycles to go around.
   "The {high moby} is {down}, so we're running with only
   half the usual amount of memory.  There will be a cycle drought
   until it's fixed."

cycle of reincarnation: [coined by Ivan Sutherland ca. 1970] n.
   Term used to refer to a well-known effect whereby function in a
   computing system family is migrated out to special-purpose
   peripheral hardware for speed, then the peripheral evolves toward
   more computing power as it does its job, then somebody notices that
   it is inefficient to support two asymmetrical processors in the
   architecture and folds the function back into the main CPU, at
   which point the cycle begins again.  Several iterations of this
   cycle have been observed in graphics-processor design, and at least
   one or two in communications and floating-point processors.  Also
   known as `the Wheel of Life', `the Wheel of Samsara', and other
   variations of the basic Hindu/Buddhist theological idea.

cycle server: n. A powerful machine that exists primarily for
   running large {batch} jobs.  Implies that interactive tasks such as
   editing are done on other machines on the network, such as
   workstations.