=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= F.U.C.K. Anthology II --------------------- There is always kidding about tagline rippoffs and some people take it seriously, but fuck it. This anthology if full of taglines I have collected over the last year or so. Some are fucking hilarious, while others are funny, but ring a lot of the truth. Read them and take it for what it is worth. McBorg: Over 50 Billion Assimilated. Circumstantial evidence may suffice, as when there's fish in the milk One man's cultist is another man's prophet ... As your Doctor I advise you to drink heavily. I'm not stupid, I'm neuroanatomically challenged. REALITY.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot universe? (Y/N/Q) I'm in shape ... round's a shape isn't it? RAM = Rarely Adequate Memory I know a good tagline when I steal one. He who dies with the most TAGLINES wins! (A)bort, (R)etry, (S)mack the @#$%* thing with a BFH! Courage is just stupidity with a BOLD look on your face! Yes, that IS a shotgun in my pocket, but I AM glad to see you anyway. Now wait a minute... How do I know you're the REAL Angel of Death? Call my dad...my mom's too busy. - Chelsea Clinton to school nurse. Strangely enough, some of my best friends are humans. BorgDOS v3.02 loaded... All valuable programs will be assimilated! C:\DOS ... C:\DOS\RUN ... RUN\DOS\RUN! ... CAUTION!!! Do NOT look at laser with remaining eye... If it wasn't for C, we would be using BASI, PASAL and OBOL! God Said : E = mv - Ze/r, And There Was Light Help me, my operator is pulling my plu ՟ NO CARRIER Proofread carefully to see if you any words out. Life is anything that dies when you stomp it. Dyslexics are genetically designed to translate Japanese. "If you can't make it good, make it LOOK good." - B Gates Line noise provided by Southwestern Bell Telephone! Two most common elements in the universe: Hydrogen & Stupidity. Never date a woman who can pee higher on a wall than you can GVRNMENT.SYS Corrupted: (P)anic? Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it. I know it all. I just can't remember it all. Drugs, crime, sex, money... God, I love Congress. Im sorry officer, I didnt realize I was breaking the laws of physics Don't be a butt nugget Double your Hard Drive Space: DELETE WINDOWS! Beware of averages ... they regress to the mean! SsUeBnLdIMINmAeL TmAoGnLeIyNE. Downloading at 300 baud is as exciting as fucking Mother Teresa. Remember when safe sex was a padded headboard? "You keep saying that, I don't think it means what you think it means" Your Cat-Scan shows disfiguration, I wanna laugh myself to death. This tagline is SHAREWARE! To register, send me $10 Tag line thievery ... On the next Geraldo! A genius recognizes a moron faster than a moron recognizes a genius. IN STEREO WHERE AVAILABLE ۲ Why buy her a Diamond when SHE don't last forever? y lips make promises but my heart is a whore. Super-sado-masochistic-expialidocious! The next time you wave, please use ALL of your fingers. Don't pick up a girl unless you can lift her boyfriend. oes God have unlimited disk space? Windows - The best 8 meg solitare game around! Lawyers should advertise on hospital ceilings. OS/2 - because YOU'RE not afraid of a few hundred bugs. Help stamp out, eliminate and abolish redundancy! New Grammar: Bad - Worse - Windoze Click ... click ... click ... damn, out of taglines! I just got pulled over by the LAPD, and boy, am I beat! As easy as 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841. 640k = 4 Megs In Dog Bytes. NY cops go bar-hopping; LA cops go night-clubbing. If at first you don't succeed, redefine success... How do I set my Laserprinter to stun ?? "The human race has only one effectaive weapon, and that is laughter." "When policy fails, try thinking." "Genuis is 10 percent insperation, and 50 percent capitol gains." Obscenity is whatever gives the Judge an erection. Illiterate? Write for FREE HELP! Shh! Be vewy vewy quiet! I'm hunting wuntime ewwors! If I wanted culture, I'd go eat yogurt. Pollytheism (n.), The belief that God is a parrot. (Pollytheist) On the 8th day, the Corps of Engineers started changing everything. This message was typed on recycled phosphor. Pardon me. What other colors of Poupon do you have? That tagline is TRUE -> <- That tagline is FALSE Man created booze, God created weed, who do YOU trust? If you're not part of the solution, you're part of Congress. Windows 3.1... The 486 Crippler. Strangely enough, some of my best friends are humans. Hello? I know you're out there, I can hear you reloading. Experiment #9: Cats without legs never land on all fours. Don't be sexist. Broads hate that. Success is a matter of luck; just ask any failure. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. Windows. The President Bush of your computer. Despite the cost of living, it remains popular. Dogs crawl under fences; software crawls under Windows. Ross Perot: Best reason for the CIA to keep hiring assassins. Real men use the command lines... In God we trust; all others we voice verify. What if God is virtualizing reality? C:\>Erase c:\reality.sys Copy a:\trek\*.* c:\ "I say we nuke the site from Orbit, they're all liberals anyway." Don't take life too seriously ... it's not permanent. h  mM gs AAAAA: American Association Against Acronym Abuse. When someone says, "Have a nice day," tell them you have other plans. Ohgreat,nowmydamnspacebarwon'twork! Since you're going to die anyway, can we use you as a shield?? Christian (n): Two-legged sport animal originally bred for lion food. Best loved feature of MS-DOS 6.0: the uninstall. Death is Life's way of telling you you've been fired. Here's a final in from Rome: Lions - 42, Christians - 0 Are you using Windows.......or is that just an XT? "Toto, I don't think we're in DOS anymore..." $ not found ... A)bort, R)efinance, or D)eclare Bankrupcy '\o,.:"/v Tagline debris. 007 Error 216: Tagline out of paper. to read the next message A lecture on time travel will be held yesterday. Arkansas foreplay: "Sis, are you awake?" Backup is for whimps! Batches, batches, we don' need no steenkin' batches! Beware of geeks bearing .GIFS! Buy a 486-33 you can reboot faster Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard... Calm down. It's only ones and zeros. College is just High School with ashtrays. Control-ALT-Delete thyself D.A.M.N. Nude Mothers against Dyslexia Daddy! Let me push a-!@# NO CARRIER Do you mind, if we dance wif yo dates.... Eat the rich - the poor are tough and stringy. ERROR 301: Keyboard not found. Press F1 to resume. Error : (A)bort (R)etry (S)ell it ERROR LPT1 not found.. use backup - PENCIL & PAPER Ever caught yourself reading taglines and not the msgs? Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity Hard DISK? Gee lady, I misunderstood you. I am not young enough to know everything. I like children, if they are properly cooked! I'm not arrogant, I'm just better than you. I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this? If there is no God, who pops up the Kleenex? If you can't think of a tagline, steal one! (like I do!) Ignorance is temporary, stupidity is permanent It's not a virus... it's just Windows 3.0! It's not what you say, it's what I think you said. Jesse Jackson: the EDLIN of political candidates. Looks like a booger --> @ , but its not. MS Word: From the folks who brought you EDLIN My system goes down more often than a $10 whore. Nobody ever expects the Spanish Inquisition Politically incorrect and DAMNED proud of it!!! Schizophrenia beats being alone. To err is human. To moo is bovine. h$ s G ❞ My karma just ran over your dogma. --T-A+G-L-I+N-E--+M-E-A+S-U-R+I-N-G+--G-A+U-G-E-- Don't play stupid with me, I'm better at it! Another brilYunt mind DiZtroyed by da publik edukashun sistem. Jesus saves...Gretzky gets the rebound...he shoots...he SCORES!! Police tagline. Do not cross. SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . . RAM = Rarely Adequate Memory Drop your carrier ... we have you surrounded! A feature is a bug with seniority. RAM DISK is NOT an installation procedure! DOS never says "EXCELLENT command or filename"... Downloading at 300 baud is as exciting as fucking Mother Teresa. All generalizations are false. Anarchy is against the law. For God's Sake, Get Off...She's Dead Jim! Minds & parachutes only function properly when open. ..................... Group Photo Power corrupts. Absolute power is kinda neat. Pardon my driving... I'm trying to reload, eh? Blood is thicker than water, and much tastier Born Free, Taxed to Death !! Cockroaches rule the Earth. Pass it on. George Bush - the EDLIN of Presidents ! Gravity is a myth. The Earth sucks. Gun Control-- Being able to hit the Target! I am free of prejudices. I hate everyone equally. I am going to live forever, or die trying! It said "Insert disk #3", but only two will fit!! Paranoia is heightened awareness!! Press [Ctrl][Alt][Del] to continue. "Obscenity is whatever gives the Judge an erection" ...A penny saved is a Congressional oversight. Ask me about my vow of silence. Blood is thicker than water, and much tastier. Castration takes balls. Criminal lawyer. Isn't that redundant? Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity. Gravity doesn't exist: the earth sucks. I just got my AT&T bill. Buy stock! Pardon my driving; I'm trying to reload. That was Zen, this is Tao. The worst thing about censorship is . WARNING! SAFESEX.ZIP is a Trojan. Windows is NOT a virus... a virus DOES something! Holodeck, run program "Kill_Wesley_One." Real programmers use COPY CON:PROGRAM.EXE If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. In the Beginning, God rolled a 00 on the Random World Generation Table Chernobyl Used Macs Always remember that you're unique, just like everyone else. Resistence is futile. Resistence is amusing. Resistance is appreciated 2400 baud makes you want to get out and push If you have seen any cool taglines and you want to submit them for future publication just mail them along. Peace. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Questions, comments, bitches, ideas, etc : z3brf@ttacs.ttu.edu : FUCK = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Official F.U.C.K. 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