
Top 10 Signs You've Gone To a Bad Hypnotist - July 23, 1992

10. When you come to, he's wearing your clothes.
9. You now own 19 Juice Tigers.
8. Days after your appointment, strangers come up to you on the street
   saying how much they enjoyed you in that live-sex show.
7. Everywhere you look: giant, whistling squirrels.
6. He tells you your wallet is blocking the alpha rays - better let
   him hold it.
5. He says, "You're getting very... uh... slippery - no, that's not
   it."
4. Anytime someone says the word "hello" you find yourself naked in
   Syracuse.
3. Suddenly you remember him from shop class.
2. Instead of tapping into your subconscious, he just waits for you
   to doze off and then yells stuff at you.
1. You wake up married to Doug Henning.

