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Anything But Love episode guide
by Dennis Kytasaari & John Lavalie
dtd 2 Jan 95


aired Mar 1989 - Jun 1992  56 eps


regulars:
Jamie Lee Curtis as Hannah Louann Miller, an ex-teacher turned writer
Richard Lewis as Martin "Marty" Ezekiel Gold, feature writer for the magazine
Richard Frank as Jules Bennett, executive assistant [ in the 1st season Jules'
last name was Kramer ]
Sandy Faison as Pamela Peyton-Finch [ 1st season only ], fashion and gossip
writer
Louis Giambalvo as Norman Keil [ 1st season only ], editor of Chicago Monthly
Holly Fulger as Robin Dulitski [ season 2+ ], Hannah's best friend
Ann Magnuson as Catherine Hughes [ season 2+ ], hip new editor for Chicago
Weekly
Joseph Maher as Brian Alquist [ 2nd season only ], entertainment critic who
hates TV
Jane Milmore as Kelly [ eps 7-19 only ], a minor writer
Billy Van Zandt as Harold [ episodes 7-19 only ], another minor writer
Bruce Weitz as Mike Urbanek [ season 3+ ], writer with the regular guy angle
semi-regular:
Bruce Kirby as Leo Miller [ 1st season only ], Hannah's father


      Anything But Love was the story of Hannah Miller and her relationship with
Marty Gold. After they meet Marty gets Hannah a job in research at the magazine
where he works. Hannah, an aspiring writer, sees this as an opportunity to get
into the business. The show was created by Wendy Kout and developed by Dennis
Koenig. Creative differences between Wendy, Jamie & Richard caused her to leave
the series after the 1st season.

      When the show was picked up for the following fall season it had some
revisions to the format. Marty, Hannah and Jules still worked at the magazine
but other characters were replaced. A hip new editor was brought in and played
to the hilt by performance artist Ann Magnuson. Holly Fulger was added to give
Hannah a best friend to confide her thoughts about Marty with. One of the
running bits between Hannah and Robin was that they called each other Mrs.
Shmenkman. A name they came up with years ago when they decided they would both
marry a couple of brothers named Shmenkman before they were thirty. Joseph Maher
was added to round out the major cast. Other minor characters in the first part
of the 2nd season were played by Billy Van Zandt and Jane Milmore, they were
also the show's executive story consultants during this time. Their characters
didn't really do much and were dropped halfway through the season. Joseph
Maher's character was also dropped after the second season and Bruce Weitz was
brought in as Mike Urbanek, an everyman's writer. One of his primary functions
was to become Marty's confidant for his relationship with Hannah. Other
significant characters are shown in the guest cast, with their character names
between these brackets [  ] for their first appearance only. After the title of
the episode, those brackets are also used to highlight the content of the
opening bits that were added to the beginning of episodes, starting in the
second season. These little vignettes featured Hannah and Marty sitting at a
diner counter making observations on life, love, etc...


1st Season 1989  ABC  30 min  stereo  closed captioned


_001. Fear of Flying { Robin Frates, Craig Gini, Beth Robbins, Marilyn Coleman }

      Hannah decides to quit teaching and leave her boyfriend, Jack, and return
home to Chicago to become a writer. On the flight home to Chicago, Hannah meets
and helps Marty deal with his fear of flying and he tells her about a research
job open at Chicago Monthly, the magazine where he is a writer. Hannah goes down
the magazine to apply for the job, meets the editor and is challenged to write a
2,000 word article on "the tortilla wars, does Chicago prefer corn or flour?,"
for 9 o'clock the following morning.

      b: 7 Mar 89  w: Dennis Koenig & Wendy Kout  d: Michael Lessac

_002. Deadline { Taylor Negron }

      Hannah's first deadline prompts her first fight with Marty when she loses
his article in the computer and he doesn't have a backup, much to Pamela's
delight.

      b: 14 Mar 89  w: George Zateslo  d: Michael Lessac

_003. Burning the Toad { Robin Thomas, Wendie Malick [ Alice ] }

      Hannah's old boyfriend and Marty's ex-college roommate are one in the same
person, and Jack tries to convince her that he has changed. Meanwhile, Hannah
and Marty are working on a story that will expose a charity scam.

      b: 21 Mar 89  w: Sheree Guitar  d: Michael Lessac

_004. Love and Death { John O'Leary }

      Marty doesn't want anyone to know he is living in fear when he receives
his first death threat.

      b: 28 Mar 89  w: Judd Pillot & John Peaslee  d: Michael Lessac

_005. Dorothy Dearest { Doris Belack }

      Marty is in turmoil when his mother stops by for a visit and Hannah gets
him face his relationship with her, so he can get rid of all the angst it
generates.

      b: 4 Apr 89  w: Barbara Hall  d: Michael Lessac

_006. This is Not a Date { Fred Applegate, Mona Lyden, Wendy Malick }

      Hannah is down in the dumps and Marty gets dumped, so the two of them go
out together, for her birthday and the end of his relationship with Alice- but
it's "not a date".

      b: 11 Apr 89  w: Barbara Hall, Dennis Koenig & Wendy Kout  s: Marc
Flanagan  d: Michael Lessac

      NOTE: Wendie Malick's name is credited differently in this episode.


2nd Season 1989


_007. Ch-Ch-Changes [ vacation... ] { Denise Pickering, Christopher Collins }

      Hannah returns from a vacation to find that the magazine has been bought
by a corporation and the hip new editor comes in and begins to stir things up,
especially Marty whom considers resigning. Hannah becomes a writer, the magazine
is changed to a weekly format and is renamed the Chicago Weekly and an English
book and theatre critic is brought into review television.

      b: 27 Sep 89  w: Peter Noah  d: David Trainer

_008. Those Lips, Those Thais [ plants... ] { Tia Carrere }

      If he doesn't already feel guilty enough about everything, Marty really
feels guilty when his Thailanese foster daughter comes to attend college in
Chicago and he is really attracted to her.

      b: 4 Oct 89  w: Bruce Rasmussen  d: Michael Lessac

_009. It's My Party and I'll Schvitz If I Want To [ shay what... ] { Jimmy Lee
Newman Jr. }

      An unexpected heat wave puts a damper on a party Hannah tries throwing
because she wants to warm up her relationship with Catherine.

      b: 11 Oct 89  w: Janis Hirsch  d: David Trainer

_010. Scared Straight [ superstitions... ] { Nick Toth, Paunita Nichols, Jim
Maniaci }

      Marty and Hannah trade bylines to prove that Catherine is using favoritism
in choosing articles for publication, and Marty winds up jail protecting "his"
source.

      b: 18 Oct 89  w: Bill Diamond & Michael Saltzman  d: Michael Lessac

_011. Mr. Mom [ mood music ] { Austin Pendleton }

      Hannah finds out that her mother had her heart donated. She finds the new
owner is a depressed man, whom is not living his prolonged life to its fullest,
the way Hannah envisioned the recipient would.

      b: 25 Oct 90  w: Lloyd Garver  d: Matthew Diamond

_012. Just the Facts, Ma'am [ Number Nine... ] { Richard Kind, Lisa Fuller }

      Hannah sweet-talks Bradley, a factchecker, into letting a libelous quote
into her article, this all leads to a 10 million dollar libel suit and Hannah
having to fire him.

      b: 1 Nov 89  w: Bill Diamond & Michael Saltzman  d: Michael Lessac

_013. Bang You're Dead [ working out... ] { Corbin Bernsen, Richard McGonagle,
Maris Clement, Lauren Tuerk }

      Hannah loves Marty's psychiatrist to death and Marty finds it difficult to
cope with being shrinkless. Marty has a final session with his shrink
casket-side.

      b: 8 Nov 89  w: Billy Van Zandt & Jane Milmore  d: Michael Lessac

      NOTE: Corbin Bernsen was not listed in the credits for his role in this
episode; was he using one of the other credits as a pseudonym?

_014. Truth or Consequences [ museums... ] { Lenny Imamura, Ted Warren }

      Catherine makes everyone take a lie detector test when she suspects
someone on the staff is leaking gossip about her to an underground rag.

      b: 15 Nov 89  w: Bruce Rasmussen  d: Michael Lessac

      NOTE: This caption followed the broadcast of this episode: "Federal law
prohibits most private employers from using lie detector test during the course
of employment."

_015. It's Better to Have Loved and Flossed [ pillow talk... ]

      A trip to the dentist for Marty also includes making a date with Robin and
she is more than ready for a relationship and proves it by overreacting to a
little kiss.

      b: 22 Nov 89  w: Billy Van Zandt & Jane Milmore  d: Michael Lessac

_016. Harts and Bones [ heaven... ] { Kate McNeil [ Gail ] }

      Hannah insists she's not jealous of Marty's new girlfriend and invites
them to dinner to prove it. When his date appears to be choking, Hannah delivers
the Heimleich maneuver and breaks a rib, but she's not jealous.

      b: 29 Nov 89  w: Alan Kirschenbaum  d: James Widdoes

_017. Woman on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown [ ice capades... ] { Robert
Beuth, Andy Dick, Patrick Ryan }

      Catherine's decides to become "ordinary," after being snubbed of a mention
in pop-culture legend's recently published diaries, and leaves Marty in charge
of the magazine. The "Squaddies" protest Brian's review of the latest Star Squad
movie and storm the newsroom to make Brian come to their convention.

      b: 6 Dec 89  w: Janis Hirsch  d: James Widdoes

_018. Breast of Friends [ petting... ] { David Sage, Ron Canada, Suanne Spoke,
Valerie Redding, Gwil Richards, Richard Marion }

      Marty nurses a bruised ego when he sings show tunes on a news talk show
and Hannah makes a celebrity out of a woman who was thrown out of a restaurant
for nursing her baby.

      b: 13 Dec 89  w: Martin Sage & Sybil Adelman  d: Michael Lessac

      NOTE: Is Gwil Richards a real name? That is, the way it was credited on
the show, TV Guide listed this name as Gail.

_019. Hotel of the Damned [ oh say can you see... ] { Ralph Mauro }

      When the magazine needs a new cover story in less than 20 hours, Hannah &
Marty must goto a hotel to write the story. While searching for an angle on the
story, Hannah decides the mood may be just right to check out the bed with
Marty.

      b: 10 Jan 90  w: Bill Barol  d: Robert Berlinger

_020. All About Allison [ hitchhiking... ] { Courtney Thorne-Smith }

      Marty is the unwitting weapon used by an aspiring young journalist against
Hannah, after Hannah helped her get a chance to work for the magazine.

      b: 17 Jan 90  w: Bill Diamond & Michael Saltzman  d: Michael Lessac

_021. Proof it All Night [ rice pudding... ] { Linda Lutz, John Mulkeen, Todd
Schaeffer, John Vidor }

      When the staff is gearing up for an all-nighter to get out their election
issue, Hannah gets excited; however Marty is less than enthusiastic, especially
when the election is close, the night is long and the candidate he thought was a
lock, loses and he has no material.

      b: 24 Jan 90  w: Alan Kirschenbaum  d: Robert Berlinger

_022. Three Men on a Match [ hiccups... ] { John Calvin, Ralph Manza, Gail
O'Grady, Tony Cecere, Clay Boss }

      Hannah and Marty go out to dinner with Robin to help her celebrate her
un-anniversary. After seeing Robin's ex-husband there, each has a different
perspective on how the restaurant caught fire. Everyone turned their heads when
they walked across the room.

      b: 7 Feb 90  w: Janis Hirsch  d: Michael Lessac

_023. Partying is Such Sweet Sorrow [ secrets... ] { Kate McNeil, Philip
Sterling, Peggy Pope, Dan Gilvezan, David Wiley, Lisa Robins, Ross L. Martin,
Kenneth Neufeld, Bill New Jr., David James Raycroft }

      Marty's girlfriend plans a surprise birthday party for him, but he
surprises her and everyone else by breaking up with her, before everybody yells
surprise.

      b: 14 Feb 90  w: Billy Van Zandt & Jane Milmore  d: Michael Lessac

_024. The Icewoman Cometh [ valentine's day... ] { Leslie Bevis, Lou Felder }

      Marty may become editor after a corporate trouble-shooter comes into
evaluate and decides Catherine is out and he is in, never mind that Marty slept
with her. A little corporate blackmail may work wonders to save Catherine's job,
using Marty as the tool.

      b: 28 Feb 90  w: Bruce Rasmussen  d: Michael Lessac

_025. Hooray For Hollywood [ do you wanna dance... ] { Scott Williamson, Lisa
Aliff, Vicki Juditz }

      A friend of Marty's, a Hollywood producer, decides to "do lunch" with
Hannah when he wants to make a movie about one of her stories, something Marty
has rejected for a long time.

      b: 7 Mar 90  w: Bill Barol  d: Michael Lessac

_026. Robin Q. Public [ mushrooms... ]

      When Catherine gets the impression that the magazine may have become too
high brow, she searches out the everyman's opinion. When she hears Robin's
thoughts, she is impressed and takes her on as a consultant and the entire staff
becomes on edge.

      b: 14 Mar 90  w: Bill Diamond & Michael Saltzman  d: Robert Berlinger

_027. The Days of Whine and... [ what to wear... ] { Meg Wittner, Susie Duff,
Madelyn Cates, Jeff Silverman, Sumer Stamper, Ashley Bank, Cody Burger }

      A woman arrives and threatens to make Brian's life a living hell, by
threatening to get back at him for the bad review he gave that caused her
husband to die. Hannah meets Marty's ex-fiancee at his family's Seder and sees
that the old flame may still be lit.

      b: 21 Mar 90  w: Janis Hirsch  d: Robert Berlinger

_028. Thirty... Something? [ don't say it... ] { Greg Itzin, Josh C. Williams,
Katie Jane Johnson, Elyse Nicole Sherman, Isaac Harrison, Kendrick Hughes }

      Hannah's 30th birthday is no party for her when she takes time to reflect
on her life and love. Hannah's little voice inside her head tells her that
what's missing is Marty.

      b: 28 Mar 90  w: Peter Noah  d: Robert Berlinger


3rd Season 1991


_029. Say it Again, Han (1) { John Ritter [ Patrick Serreau ] }

      The development of their romance is put on hold when Patrick Serreau, a
world class photographer, comes to Chicago to take pictures for the magazine.
Patrick's interest in taking pictures isn't as great as his interest in Hannah.

      b: 6 Feb 91  w: Peter Noah  d: Robert Berlinger

      NOTE: This episode picked up right where the show ended last season and
there was no opening bit.

_030. Martus Interruptus (2) [ plastics... ] { John Ritter }

      Patrick thinks that he has a great working chemistry with Hannah when they
put together a their story on toxic-waste, so he offers he a chance to work with
him in West Africa.

      b: 13 Feb 91  w: Janis Hirsch  d: Robert Berlinger

_031. Hello... Mali? (3) [ he said, she said... ] { John Ritter, Andre Rosey
Brown, Tony Longo }

      As Hannah prepares to accompany Patrick to the jungle, he and Marty
contend with the urban jungle; there Patrick shows his true colors.

      b: 27 Feb 91  w: Billy Van Zandt & Jane Milmore  d:  Robert Berlinger

_032. Long Day's Journey into... What? [ to tell the truth... ]

      After Hannah & Marty complete their relationship they begin to fantasize
how everyone at the office will react.

      b: 13 Mar 91  w: Peter Noah  d: Peter Berlinger

_033. The Day After [ bacon & eggs... ]

      Marty and Hannah have their first relationship-related fight the next day
at work when Marty must edit her article and Hannah resents the changes.

      b: 20 Mar 91  w: Janis Hirsch  d: Robert Berlinger

_034. The Torrid Zone [ the kiss king... ] { Felicity Waterman, Patrick
Warburton, David Allyn }

      Much to Hannah's dismay, Marty must accompany a swimsuit model to the
Caribbean for an interview during her latest photo shoot.

      b: 27 Mar 91  w: Bill Bryan  d: Robert Berlinger

_035. My New Best Friend [ yppah birthday... ] { Brenda Strong, David Allyn }

      Hannah befriends the mistress of a billionaire just to get her exclusive
story, but regrets it later when she finds out what she is really like.

      b: 1 Apr 91  w: Bill Barol  d: Robert Berlinger

_036. Adventures in Babysitting [ danger man... ] { Lindsey Haun, Ellen Ratner,
Joel Cason }

      Hannah gets called away and Marty is left totally alone to entertain
Hannah's 5-year-old niece, Marty's appendix has other ideas.

      b: 10 Apr 91  w: Janis Hirsch  d: Robert Berlinger

_037. Isn't it Romantic [ shelf life... ] { David Allyn, Jeremy Lubbock }

      On Valentine's Day, Marty must find a way to rekindle their relationship
when Hannah decides the fire has gone out.

      b: 17 Apr 91  w: Bill Barol  d: Richard Marion

_038. Scream A Little Scream [ watch what... ] { Linda Lutz }

      Catherine tries scream therapy as a way to reduce tension. Robin becomes a
fifth wheel in her relationship with Hannah and Marty.

      b: 8 May 91  w: Bill Bryan  d: Robert Berlinger

_039. Pot of Gold [ old man marty... ] { Marius Mazmanian, David Allyn }

      A new magazine puts feelers out for Hannah, so Catherine plans to give her
a raise to keep her. Consequently, Marty's self-esteem drops because she'll make
more than he does.

      b: 15 May 91  w: Bill Bryan  d: Robert Berlinger


4th Season 1991


_040. Enormous Changes at the Last Minute [ yo ho ho... ] { Dee Macaluso }

      A home pregnancy test turns up positive, Hannah and Marty makes plans to
get married in a hurry, the doctors results are a bit different.

      b: 25 Sep 91  w: Peter Noah  d: Peter Noah

_041. I Feel a Cult Coming On [ just looking... ] { Stephen Wesley Bridgewater,
Jan Hoag, Jim Fitzpatrick, Michele Smith }

      Marty exposes a cult and they retaliate by exposing facts about the staff.
Marty becomes worried because he has one thing about him and Catherine that he
hasn't yet mentioned to Hannah.

      b: 2 Oct 91  w: Bill Barol  d: Robert Berlinger

_042. A Tale of Two Kiddies [ short stack... ] { Elissabeth Moss, Emily Ann
Lloyd, Bradley Michael Pierce, Gina Tuttle, Jason Marsden, Reno Goodale }

      A young girl gets to be editor for the day, which sets the tone for Marty
and Hannah imagining what love would have been like if they had met at a younger
ages. They do this while celebrating their 1st anniversary of knowing each
other.

      b: 9 Oct 91  w: Bruce Rasmussen  d: Robert Berlinger

_043. M is For the Many Things She Forgot She Gave Me [ necessities... ] { Anna
Berger }

      Marty must place his mother in a home when her failing memory begins to
force the issue.

      b: 16 Oct 91  w: Bruce Helford  d: Robert Berlinger

_044. Gimmie An "O" [ what if I... ] { Richard Burgi }

      Hannah makes a joke about the best sex she ever had, Marty sets out to
find out the details after he finds out it wasn't him.

      b: 23 Oct 91  w: Marjorie Gross  d: Robert Berlinger

_045. Training Film [ pass it, please... ] { Kenneth White }

      Marty's bad day is made worse when Hannah takes him on a train trip but
the only thing on his mind is "Murder on the Wisconsin Express".

      b: 30 Oct 91  w: Janis Hirsch  d: Robert Berlinger

_046. First Lady Sings the Blues [ this seat's taken... ] { Lauren Tom, Thomas
Nelson Webb, Angel Harper }

      Marty becomes obsessed when he finds out his cholesterol is too high,
meanwhile Hannah provides shelter interviews the widow of a deposed monarch and
is she a royal pain.

      b: 20 Nov 91  w: Janis Hirsch  d: Robert Berlinger

_047. Stop Me Before I... Again [ ooh, my head... ] (1) { John Ritter, Kelly
Goodman, Aaron Freeman, Joy Creel, Monica Creel, Leanna Creel }

      Patrick Serreau returns for the opening of a gallery show featuring his
erotic pictures, but he shows no sign of his old lecherous self to a
disbelieving Hannah.

      b: 4 Dec 91  w: Peter Noah  d: Robert Berlinger

      NOTE: The Creel triplets were not credited for their appearance in this
episode.

_048. Stop Me Before I... Again [ solidarity... ] (2) { John Ritter, John
Briganti, Joy Creel, Monica Creel, Leanna Creel }

      Patrick tries to set Marty up with the triplets, who love Jewish men,
featured in his exhibition so he can discredit him in the eyes of Hannah and
strengthen his own position.

      b: 11 Dec 91  w: Bruce Helford  d: Robert Berlinger

      NOTE: The Creel triplets were not credited for their appearance in this
episode.

_049. Salmonella is Coming to Town [ world of flavors... ] { Cristine Rose, Dave
Adams, Ric Sarabia, Charles Hutchins, Tony Veneto, Jean Pflieger, Mary Ellen
David }

      Jules cost cuts on a holiday dinner for the homeless, with sickening
results. When Hannah convinces Marty to go all out for Christmas, she gets the
idea that he has, by getting a new apartment for them.

      b: 18 Dec 91  w: Bruce Rasmussen  d: Robert Berlinger

_050. The Call of the Mild [ wings... ] { Cleto Augusto, Jan Eddy }

      Marty, Jules & Mike go to a wild man weekend in which Marty refuses to
take part, Jules decides to right Catherine's wrongs and Mike writes a poem.

      b: 8 Jan 92  w: Bruce Rasmussen  d: Jamie Lee Curtis

_051. I'd Kill For a Mink [ different strokes... ] { Lou Felder, Stephen
Prutting, Ken Zavayna, Michael Ashe, Jeff Kahn }

      Robin and the Animal Rescue Front (ARF), a group of animal rights
activists, are after Marty when he writes an article they don't agree with.
Marty is after them when their pet mink bites him. This is all further
complicated by the fact Catherine needs to keep fur ads in the magazine to keep
their budget intact.

      b: 15 Jan 92  w: Marjorie Gross  d: Thomas J. Thompson

_052. Catherine Honey, I'm Home [ public enemies... ] { Boyd Gaines, Elyse
Donalson, Mark Porro }

      Catherine seeks cooking advice from Hannah when the husband from her open
marriage suddenly shows up, wanting a divorce because he has found a new mate.

      b: 22 Jan 92  w: Robert Borden  d: Robert Berlinger

_053. Angst For the Memories [ huh?... ] { Eric Allan Kramer, D.D. Howard }

      The visit of Hannah's friend, Rachel, disturbs Marty who thinks Hannah
will unlike the fact that she and Marty once had a one-night stand.

      b: 5 Feb 92  w: David Rosenthal  d: Robert Berlinger

_054. Tryst and Shout [ mama done told me... ]

      Mike's wife is out of town for a while, so Hannah invites him over for
dinner and then he hits it off with Robin and Hannah becomes worried, what if he
hits on her?

      b: 14 Feb 92  w: Bill Barol  d: Robert Berlinger

_055. The Waiting [ nothing works... ] { Jeffrey Hayenga }

      As Hannah sits in a specialist's office awaiting the results of her
biopsy, she reflects on the past week of living with this secret from Marty.

      b: 27 May 92  w: Peter Noah  d: Peter Noah

_056. Marty Walks [ surprise me... ] { Adam Carl, Jean Pflieger }

      When Catherine won't print one of his stories, Marty quits the magazine
and Hannah is left holding Marty's big article on airline safety. Hannah becomes
the arbitrator in the their dispute.

      b: 3 Jun 92  w: David Rosenthal  d: Robert Berlinger



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 NOTES

 Any corrections, updates or other comments about this guide may be
 sent to fuddle@netcom.com (John Lavalie).

 This guide may be distributed and copied freely, in its entirety, for
 personal use. All original author and copyright information must remain
 intact. Any sales or other uses of this document are expressly forbidden,
 without the specific consent of the author(s).

 This guide was established in this format on 10 Apr 94.

 Copyright (c) 1994-95, Dennis Kytasaari & John Lavalie. All rights reserved.

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