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E  ||==//  \\==// ||   \\ ||==|| ||   ||         #017-SB07 -- [01/17/92] 
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                               A Bedtime Story 
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                       by Snarfblat, the Fork of Spoon 
 
     Michael Buckingham is legendary for his sweeping away of young children. 
He frequently picks them up as he is walking through town.  Parents used to 
tell their children to be careful.  They would say, "Freddie. If you see an 
evil looking man in a long black coat swinging a small gold chain, run away 
as fast as you can." Now they just say, "Stay indoors until you are 21 and 
you'll be safe." Mr. Buckingham should be left to himself.  Rumour has it 
that he didn't have a happy childhood.  His mother made him wear a purple 
jumpsuit every day because his grandmother made it.  Sometimes he carries a 
rainbow colored umbrella.  Watch out for that.   
     He walks briskly, staring straight forward as if there are a million 
things more important than you.  Then he turns towards you and grabs your 
first born child. 
     "Hihowyadoing? Nicekidgottagoseeyalater!" Goodbye Junior.  You can see 
your son's form through the coat, as he struggles to escape.  But even as you 
watch, the struggles subside.  Mr.  Buckingham has taken many children.  He 
has ways to keep them from getting away.  His pockets are stocked with 
everything little kids would like to play with.  That keeps them quiet for 
the walk home.  After that nobody sees them.  Most of the folks have moved 
out of that part of town. 
     Michael Buckingham is 69 now.  He rarely takes kids anymore.  Sometimes 
he will be trudging through the main street with a suspiciously full looking 
coat.  Nobody even notices now.  Sometimes one of the old folks will laugh 
and say "There goes old Bucky! He always was a crazy one." If he overhears 
them he will nod his head and flash a quick smile.  They have a right to 
laugh.  Let them. 
     Last week was the 100th anniversary of the founding of our town.  Mike 
surprised us with a huge dinner prepared in honor of all the people whose 
lives he had ruined.  "I didn't want you to think of me as one of the bad 
guys.  I had a problem, we all have problems.  Mine was just more 
noticeable." Almost every person in the town came to the banquet.  As they 
chewed into the delicious meat, many of them remarked through full mouths, "I 
hardly remember little Petey." and "When you put it that way, I guess it was 
worth losing my sole heir, because I am getting this GREAT meal." We all knew 
Mike was a good guy deep down.  Afterwards, I thought I saw something moving 
in his coat.  It was probably just his full stomach.   
 
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(C)1992 by The Durex Blender Corporation & Snarfblat of the Cybermax 
All Rights Available at the Door. No Reservations. 
 
    *** Spread the word of Turnex, the Blender for the Next Millenium. *** 
 
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