HOW TO BE TRENDY ~BALLS.FIL~ HOW TO BE TRENDY (AND SURVIVE THESE MODERN TIMES). by Slimer... Hip Hop, Metal, Nerd or not a Nerd that is the question.... Our modern western society seems to be parted in many different life styles these days. You are 'cool' when you watch MTV and buy Levis jeans and you are considered to be a wimp when you don't. I think that it is about time to introduce some new trends to replace the old (and boring) ones. You will find a list of handy hints and tips that can turn you into the most HOTest dude on the planet. Get ready for the new trends in fashion, life-style, music/t.v. and sex, be a trendsetter, be 'HOT', read D.B.A. magazine !! --- FASHION Who wants to buy jeans from Levis these days, as they are much to expensive and overhyped. Buy a cheap brand instead and show the world that you don't give a sh!t ! Be HOT and don't become a victim of commercials. Holes in your trousers are not cool, they give the impression that you can't afford to buy decent clothes. --- LIFE-STYLE Buy stuff that are not in the commercials on T.V., make a sport of avoiding them. Don't let those psycho annalists think that they can look inside your brain ! Don't be cool, NO be a 'HOT' dude. Do you know a girl that wants to sleep with a refrigerator !? Learning to master the washingmachine is considered to be HOT. Don't be the nerd that takes his dirty laundry to mommy ! Your a guy, you need to know how a washingmachine works ! Cars are no longer a symbol of status, they are polluting the environment and are bad for your health and condition. Be a man and take your bike and don't let wind, rain or a roaring thunderstorm stop you ! The Personal Computer is out !! Join the elite and buy a Falcon or at least an Archimedes. Don't be one of those millions of PC sheep on this earth. Dare ! Eeerhm, this article was typed on a PC using WordPerfect.. Most youth these days are completely crazy about America. It's really unbelievable. Remember America is founded by unwanted people that we Europeans send there. We brought our criminals to this continent to get rid of them. Just look at the high criminal rates. A lot of European crimi- nals have been influencend by American movies. Be proud of your own country !! --- MUSIC/T.V. 'House' is severely f@cked up "music" and can be considered as trash! A HOT dude doesn't move on f@cked up music only on decent music ranging from Rock to Heavy Metal or other music styles created by decent composers and singers ! At the end of this paragraph you will find a black list of t.v. programs that are NOT HOT to watch. These programs must be avoided at any cost. The people behind these programs are only after your money and mind ! Beverly Hills 90210 M.T.V. Catwalk 21 Jumpstreet The Bold and the Beautiful, and the likes Oprah Windfrey The Wheel of Fortune and other stupid game-programs --- SEX Fingerfucking will be replaced by toefucking using both of your toe's at once. These techniques are quite old but are worth to be introduced again. The normal missionary position is also back ! Who wants to get his arms and legs tangled in all kind of strange positions when you just want ordinary sex !? Forget those Chinese books or join their circus ! ~MINT.PAL~