My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.
 --Christopher Morley (1890-1957)

God made everything out of nothing, but the nothingness shows through.
 --Paul Vallery (1871-1945)

God was satisfied with his own work, and that is fatal.
 --Samuel Butler (1835-1902)

God is not dead but alive and well and working on a much less ambitious
project.
 --Graffito

Why attack God?  He may be as miserable as we are.
 --Erik Satie (1866-1925)

Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.
 --Lenny Bruce (1923-1966)

Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich.
 --Napoleon (1769-1821)

What if there had been room at the inn?
 --Linda Festa on the origins of Christianity

Christ died for our sins.  Dare we make his martyrdom meaningless by not
committing them?
 --Jules Feiffer

Catholicism has changed tremendously in recent years.  Now when Communion
is served there is also a salad bar.
 --Bill Marr

Faith is believeing what you know ain't so.
 --"A schoolboy" quoted by Mark Twain (1835-1910)

Faith is under the left nipple.
 --Martin Luther (1483-1546)

Because I'm Jewish, a lot of people ask why I killed Christ.  What can I
say?  It was an accident.  It was one of those parties that got out of
hand. I killed him because he wouldn't become a doctor.
 --Lenny Bruce (1923-1966)

Your chances of getting hit by lightning go up if you stand under a tree,
shake your fist at the sky, and say, "Storms suck!"
 --Johnny Carson

Trust in Allah, but tie your camel.
 --Arabian proverb

The last time I saw him he was walking down Lover's Lane holding his own
hand.
 --Fred Allen (1894-1956)

The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
 --Lucille S. Harper

It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities
without your help.
 --Miss Manners (Judith Martin)

