"Hey, Laser-lips!  Your mama was a snowblower!"
"Your mother mates out of season."
"Your mother rides a dustbuster!"  -- Buster Bunny
A hurricane is a blow job from Mother Nature!
A rooster says cock-a-doodle doo, yo mama says any-cock'll do.
Are those yo mama's tits, or did Laurel and Hardy leave her their heads?
Born *again*?  Your mother didn't do it right the FIRST time?
Crossposted from alt.rap.sux.yo.yo.yo.mama
Every time I pass your house, your mother runs out and barks at me!
Excuse me, I can't seem to find my dick. May I look in yo mama's mouth?
fuck your mother,save yourself a trip to the whore house
I coulda had ya mama, but I made a phone call instead...
She's so nasty, she cuts her tampoon string so crabs can't bungee jump.
Yo mama has green hair and thinks she's a tree.
Yo mama has one hand and a Clapper.
Yo mama has one leg and a bicycle.
Yo mama has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it.
Yo mama is a Ferenghi ho!
Yo mama is just like a TV remote, a 2 year old could turn her on.
Yo mama is like a bus: Guys payin a quarter to get on her all day.
Yo mama is like a race car, burns 4 rubbers a night.
Yo mama is like a shotgun, one cock and she's ready to blow!
Yo mama is missing a finger and can't count past 9.
Yo mama is so black, they count her absent at night school.
Yo Mama is so fat and stupid that she wears a VCR as a beeper!
Yo mama is so fat she had to be baptized at Marine World.
Yo Mama is so fat she has to use hoola-hoops to hold her socks up.
Yo mama is so fat that when she has to haul ass it takes two trips!
Yo mama is so fat when she bungee jumps she goes straight down to hell.
Yo mama is so fat, after sex she smokes turkeys.
Yo mama is so fat, she don't cast a shadow.
Yo mama is so fat, she got a run in her blue jeans.
Yo mama is so fat, she has her own area code.
Yo mama is so fat, she has shocks on her toilet seat.
Yo mama is so fat, she has to go outside to put on deodorant.
Yo mama is so fat, she has to use a satellite disk as a diaphragm.
Yo mama is so fat, she uses the Astrodome for a diaphragm.
Yo mama is so fat, she's on both sides of the family!
Yo mama is so fat, when I got on top of her, my ears popped.
Yo mama is so funky, when she goes for a walk cats follow her.
Yo mama is so hairy that big foot takes photos of her.
Yo mama is so old her birth certificate expired
Yo mama is so old she played kick-ball with JESUS!
Yo mama is so poor, Jimmy Swaggart gives HER money.
Yo Mama is so short, you can see her feet on her driver's license.
Yo mama is so stupid, she dialed 911 for information.
Yo Mama is so stupid, she took the Pepsi Challenge and chose Jiff.
Yo mama is so sweaty that you'd run out of flour.
Yo mama is so ugly, Dairy Queen doesn't even treat her right.
Yo mama is so ugly, her doctor is a veterinarian.
Yo mama is so ugly, she has to sneak up on her mirror.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she walks by the bathroom the toilet *FLUSHES*.
Yo mama is so wrinkled she has to screw her hat on.
Yo mama is sooooooooo fat, she has a part-time job as a trampoline!
Yo Mama like a stop sign she's on every corner...
Yo Mama like the Stay Puffed Marshmallow Man everybody gets a piece...
Yo mama only got three teeth: One in her mouth and two in her pocket!
Yo mama said she liked seafood, so I gave her crabs.
Yo mama so backwards, she sits on the t.v. and watches the couch.
Yo mama so big, she don't have cellulite, she have celluHEAVY!
yo mama so big, when she sweats people wear raincoats around her!
Yo Mama so black a piece of coal makes a white mark on her...
Yo Mama so black she got out of the car and the oil light came on...
Yo mama so black, she farts soot!
Yo mama so clumsy, she got tangled up in a cordless phone.
Yo mama so cross eyed she dropped a dime and picked up 2 nickels.
Yo mama so dirty, she has to creep up on bath water.
Yo Mama so dumb she got locked in a quicky mart and starved to death...
Yo mama so dumb, her brain cells are on the ENDANGERED SPECIES list.
yo mama so dumb, she sold the car for gas money!
Yo mama so dumb, she think a HOT MEAL is stolen food.
Yo mama so dumb, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
Yo mama so fat she sat on a rainbow and skiddles popped out.
Yo mama so fat that when I tried to drive around her, I ran out of gas.
Yo Mama so fat you can't tell if she is coming or going...
Yo mama so fat, at the zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts!
Yo Mama so fat, copters land on her when she wears a Malcolm X shirt.
Yo mama so fat, her blood type is Ragu!
Yo mama so fat, her doctor's a grounds keeper.
Yo mama so fat, if she weighed 5 more pounds, she'd get group insurance.
Yo mama so fat, McDonalds has to change their sign every time she eats
Yo mama so fat, she CAN HEAR BACON FRYING in Canada.
Yo mama so fat, she can smell bacon frying in Canada!
Yo mama so fat, she can't even tie her own shoes!
Yo mama so fat, she can't reach her back pocket.
Yo mama so fat, she fell in love and broke it!
Yo mama so fat, she got her baby pictures taken by satellite.
Yo mama so fat, she got hit by a car and the car sued for body damages.
Yo mama so fat, she got hit by a truck and asked "Who threw that rock?"
Yo mama so fat, she had her ears pierced by harpoon.
Yo mama so fat, she has her own zip code
Yo mama so fat, she has to buy two airline tickets!
Yo mama so fat, she has to go outside to sit around the house
Yo mama so fat, she has to pull down her pants to get into her pockets!
Yo mama so fat, she keeps her diaphragm in a pizza box
Yo mama so fat, she runs on Diesel!
Yo mama so fat, she shows up on radar.
Yo mama so fat, she uses the freeway as a Slip n' Slide!
Yo mama so fat, she wears a microwave for a beeper!
Yo mama so fat, when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too.
Yo mama so fat, when she sits on a chair, she makes paper!
Yo mama so fat, when she sits on my face, I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama so fat, when she steps on a scale, it read "...to be continued".
Yo mama so fat, when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th.
Yo mama so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!".
Yo mama so funky, her Sure deodorant is now confused!
Yo Mama so funky, she made right guard turn left.
Yo mama so funky, she puts ice in her panties to keep the crabs fresh!
Yo Mama so funky, she slowed down speed stick.
Yo mama so funky, she sweats Black Flag!
Yo mama so funky, she used Secret and it told on her!
Yo mama so generous, she'd give you the hair off her back!
Yo mama so hairy, she look like she got Buckwheat in a head lock.
Yo mama so hairy, she played in gorillas in the mist
Yo mama so old she farts dust!
Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class.
Yo mama so old, her birth certificate expired!
Yo mama so old, I told her to act her age and the bitch dropped dead.
Yo mama so old, she co-wrote one of the ten commandments.
Yo mama so old, she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.
Yo mama so old, she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.
Yo mama so old, she owes Jesus a nickel.
Yo mama so old, she owes Jesus food stamps!
Yo mama so old, she was there for the first day of slavery.
Yo mama so old, she wrote the foreword to the Bible!
Yo mama so poor, she bitches about the hi prices at Goodwill.
Yo Mama so poor, she cant afford free cheese!
Yo mama so poor, she goes to KFC to lick other people's fingers!
Yo mama so poor, she married young just to get the rice!
Yo Mama so poor, the Somalians are sending her food.
Yo mama so poor, your family at cereal with a fork to save milk.
Yo mama so short, she can play handball on the curb.
Yo Mama so short, she jumped off the curb and died.
Yo mama so short, she poses for trophies!
Yo Mama so skank she gets drunk at communion...
Yo mama so skinny, Sally Struthers sends her food!
Yo mama so skinny, she uses a Band-Aid as a maxi-pad.
Yo mama so slow, it takes her two hours to watch 60 minutes!
Yo mama so smelly, that her shit is glad to escape.
Yo mama so stank, she could knock a buzzard off a $#!t wagon.
Yo Mama so stupid she took a job cutting grass offshore...
Yo Mama so stupid she tried to hang her self with a cordless phone...
Yo mama so stupid, I told her it was chilly outside, she got a spoon.
Yo mama so stupid, she asked you "What is the number for 911".
Yo mama so stupid, she called a 7-11 to ask when they closed!
Yo Mama so stupid, she gets lost in thought.
Yo Mama so stupid, she ran after a parked car!
Yo mama so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is where you pay your telephone
Yo mama so stupid, she thought a quarterback was change.
Yo mama so stupid, she thought softball was a venereal disease!
Yo Mama so stupid, she went to a 99c store and asked for a price check!
Yo mama so stupid, she went to Dodger stadium and drowned in the waves.
Yo mama so stupid, when she saw a sign that said "Wet Floor", she did!
Yo mama so tall, she did a back-flip and kicked Jesus in the mouth.
Yo Mama so tall, she did a cart wheel and kicked God in the chin.
Yo Mama so ugly her rice crispies won't talk to her...
Yo mama so ugly, her dentist treats her by mail!
Yo mama so ugly, her nickname is Damn!
Yo mama so ugly, if ugly were bricks, she'd have her own projects.
Yo mama so ugly, people go as her for Halloween.
Yo mama so ugly, she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
Yo Mama so ugly, she has to trick or treat over the phone.
Yo mama so ugly, she practices birth control by leaving the lights on!
Yo mama so ugly, she scares the roaches away.
Yo mama so ugly, the psychiatrist makes her lie facedown.
Yo mama so ugly, they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
Yo mama so ugly, they turn off the cameras when she walks into a bank!
Yo mama so ugly, when she goes to the beach, the tide won't come in!
Yo mama so ugly, when she was born, the doctor slapped HER mama!
Yo mama stinks so bad, she uses lysol for perfume.
Yo mama teeth so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter.
Yo mama twice the man you are.
Yo mama was born on Independence Day and can't remember her birthday.
Yo mama was so fat that when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch
Yo mama watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
Yo mama waves around a popsickle stick and calls it air conditioning.
Yo mama would eat the flour!
Yo mama's ass is so tight, only the dogs can hear it when she farts!
Yo mama's blind and seeing another man.
Yo mama's breath so bad, her teeth have asbestos caps!
Yo mama's cross-eyed and watches TV in stereo.
Yo mama's ears are so big, she drives the freeways by sonar!
Yo mama's feet so big, she got to have license plates for her shoes.
Yo mama's glasses are so thick she can see into the future.
Yo mama's got a glass eye with a fish in it!
Yo mama's got a metal afro with rusty sideburns.
Yo mama's got a wooden leg with branches.
Yo mama's got hair on her tongue and she gargles with curl activator.
Yo mama's got snakeskin teeth.
Yo mama's got three fingers and a banjo.
Yo mama's hair is so nappy she has to take Tylenol just to comb it.
Yo mama's hair is so nappy she rolls her hair with rice.
Yo mama's head is so short that she took a shower and got brain-washed.
Yo mama's head is so short, she took a shower and got brain-washed.
Yo mama's head is so small that she got her ear pierced and died.
Yo mama's hips are so big, people set their drinks on them.
Yo mama's house so dirty, the mice ride dirt bikes!
Yo mama's like 7-11. She's on every corner, and she's always open.
Yo mama's like 7-UP...never had it, never will.
Yo mama's like a bowling ball, she always comes back for more.
Yo Mama's like a bubble gum, 5 cents a blow!
Yo mama's like a hardware store, 2 Cents a screw.
Yo mama's like a light switch, even a little kid can turn her on.
Yo mama's like a race car driver, she burns a lot of rubbers.
Yo mama's like a shotgun, give her a cock and she blows.
Yo Mama's like a video game, 3 men for a quarter!
Yo mama's like an ice cream cone, everyone gets a lick.
Yo mama's like Denny's, open 24 hours.
Yo Mama's like Lucky, still the low price leader!
Yo mama's like McDonalds, Billions and Billions served.
Yo mama's like Nintendo, Now she's portable.
Yo mama's lips are so big, chap stick invented a spray!
Yo mama's nose is so big, you can bowl with her booger!
Yo mama's nose so big, she uses her boogers for bowling balls!
Yo mama's so big she's been given her own statehood.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped into the sky and got stuck!
Yo momma's so poor, she can't even pay attention.
you're momma's so fat that when she walks she leaves snail tracks....
Your mama's like a Christmas tree,  everybody hangs balls on her.
Your mama's like a goalie: she changes her pads after three periods.
Your mama's like a railroad track: She gets laid all over the country.
Your mama's like Crazy Eddie, she's practically giving it all away
Your Mama's so fat, a picture of her would fall off the wall!
Your Mama's so fat, everytime she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
Your Mama's so fat, her yearbook picture was an aerial photo.
Your Mama's so fat, I had to slap her thigh and ride the wave in.
Your Mama's so fat, it takes her two trips to haul ass.
Your Mama's so fat, she got to iron her pants on the driveway
Your Mama's so fat, she had to go to Sea World to get baptized
Your Mama's so fat, she has to use a mattress as a maxi-pad.
Your Mama's so fat, she jumped up in the air -- AND GOT STUCK!
Your Mama's so old she owes Jesus Christ a quarter
Your Mama's so old, her birthday's expired.
Your Mama's so poor she went to McDonald's to put a shake on layaway
Your Mama's so stupid, it takes her an hour to cook minute rice.
Your Mama's so stupid, she cooked her own complimentary breakfast.
Your Mama's so stupid, she got hit by a cup and said she got mugged.
Your Mama's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
Your Mama's so stupid, she got stabbed at a shoot-out.
Your Mama's so stupid, she has blonde roots in your eyeballs.
Your Mama's so stupid, she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet!
Your Mama's so stupid, she thinks manual labor is a Mexican!
Your Mama's so stupid, she thinks socialism means partying!
Your Mama's so stupid, she went to a Clippers game to get a hair cut.
Your Mama's so stupid, she went to a Whalers game to see Shamu.
Your Mama's so ugly, her face is closed on weekends!
Your Mama's so ugly, her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her
Your Mama's so ugly, her mother had to feed her with a sling shot.
Your Mama's so ugly, she could scare the chrome off a bumper!
Your Mama's so ugly, she could scare the moss off a rock!
Your Mama's so ugly, she'd make a train take a dirt road!
Your Mama's so ugly, the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
Your Mama's so ugly, the psychiatrist makes her lie facedown.
Your Mama's so ugly, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.
Your Mama's so ugly, when she cries the tears run up her face.
Your Mama's so ugly, when she was born the doctor slapped your mother!
Your mother's like a birthday cake, everybody gets a piece.
Your mother's like a doorknob, everybody gets a turn.
Your mother's like mustard, she spreads easy.
